


My King, My Love

by Yttergrund



Category: Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Medieval, Fairy Tale Elements, Fluff and Angst, Historical Fantasy, M/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Protective Teddy Altman, Romance, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2019-02-20
Packaged: 2019-02-23 04:11:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 71,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13182102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yttergrund/pseuds/Yttergrund
Summary: Story of Teddy and Billy set in a medieval fantasy world. One is a king, the other in need of a saviour.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is going to be some kind of an amalgamation of medieval, fairy-tale and fantasy elements, though it won’t include magic, mythical beasts, superpowers etc. So calling it a fairy-tale or a fantasy story is a bit of a stretch. Closest definition would probably be a medieval story with fantastical elements.
> 
> The story is not set in our world but it is a world similar to ours. Time-period and setting would probably be something like our Europe in the 14th and 15th centuries. There will be historical anachronisms for I’m not trying to write a historically accurate story. This is simply due to the fact that it would take too much of my time to research it all. I’m also far too busy with my studies and with my other story which is called Under the Northern Sky (if you want to check that out).
> 
> First two or three chapters of this story are probably going to be somewhat heavy but it’s not going to be an angst fest throughout. Fluffy and soft Teddy/Billy story was (and is) my main intention here, so just hang in there; sweetness will be included.
> 
> Regarding those tags; neither of our boys is the person doing That. Billy is a victim of abuse however. 
> 
> Also, I’m not going to mention in the tags all the things that might happen, nor will I give trigger warnings at the start of the chapters. You don’t get such things in real life, so, you know; be warned.

///\\\\\

 

Teddy parried the blow coming towards him and with a well-placed kick he pushed the attacker off him. The man’s head hit the wall behind him hard and Teddy used his brief distraction to his own advantage; he charged forward and ran the assailant through with a savage thrust. The attacker made a choked scream as Teddy pulled back and the sword left his guts with a wet smack. The man tumbled down onto the floor, blood pouring from the wound. He was dead or was soon going to be.

Teddy leaned heavily against the wall and spat a gob of spit, mixed with blood, on the floor where it joined with the widening pool of crimson gore.

“Fuck.” Teddy muttered, removed his helmet and wiped some of the sweat off his brow and from around his mouth. A little bit of blood stained the leather palm of his gauntlet; the attacker's first surprise blow had made a small scrape on his scalp somewhere amongst his blond hair. Good thing that the helmet had withstood the blow. And more importantly; he had put on the thing on the first place.

There was still blood in his mouth; apparently he had also bit his tongue when the blow landed, if the coppery taste in his mouth was any indication. Luckily the tongue was still there and he hadn’t bitten it off; that would have been just humiliating.

But it could have been worse, much worse in fact; if he had not heard the man’s helmet clinking against the wall and thus been able to partly block the first hit, it would have been him on the flagstone floor bleeding to death. Teddy was glad that he had foregone the idea of putting on his plated armour. Yes, it would have given him more protection, but it would have made more noise than the surcoat covered mail he was wearing. Not much, but enough to make sure that the hidden assailant would have gone unnoticed. He placed his dented helmet onto a nearby windowsill; it really only blocked his sight indoors. Though, to be fair, it had helped to keep his brain where it belonged to.

Teddy wiped his gauntlet on his bloodied and dirty surcoat and continued down the corridor, trying to wish away the smell of blood and shit; he must have punctured the dead man’s bowels. Poor bastard, but that was war. War was neither chivalrous nor gallant and Teddy was glad that this would be the final battle in this blasted war.

As he crept down the corridor he stopped and tried to listen whether or not the fighting continued. He had no idea how the storming of the keep had proceeded, he had not seen any of his men for a half an hour or so. But they had had the upper hand when Teddy had stormed the keep after the bailey had been partly secured. And though he was alone, he was reasonably confident that things were not going to go sideways.

He stood still and listened for any hint of the state of the battle; there was a sound of approaching footsteps and Teddy raised his sword in anticipation. The approaching person was hidden by a curve in the corridor and because Teddy wasn’t going to go back, he simply squared his shoulders and prepared to face the possible attacker.

The footsteps got closer and Teddy’s fingers tightened their hold around the grip of his sword and he shifted his weight so as to have the best possible stance for fighting.

Teddy’s posture however relaxed when he recognised the man coming around the curve; a friend, not a foe.

“George.” Teddy sighed happily. “Good to see you.”

“Your Majesty.” He bowed his head, but then his brow furrowed. “You’re hurt, should we send for healer?”

“No.” Teddy shook his head. “It is only a scratch.”

George’s brow furrowed even more. “Where are your guards, I distinctly remember you leaving with a small retinue of knights when you stormed the keep.”

“I sent them to help to deal with the western side of the bailey.”

“And then you entered the keep without assistance. Unsecured keep, if I might add, sire.”

“Royal prerogative.” Teddy shrugged.

“Indeed, sire. You’ve never been afraid to put your royal self into danger, always running into the fray, heedless of consequences.” George replied with an unamused huff. “But, to more important matters. The castle is ours; the outer and inner baileys are secure as is the keep and the gatehouses. The rebels surrendered a moment ago and the royal standard flies on the mast.”

Teddy closed his eyes and sighed wearily but with immense gratitude. The war was finally over, well, nearly over.

“Excellent. Is there any news of Lord Norris?”

“I’m sorry, sire. There is none.” George shook his head.

“Dammit!” Teddy cursed and hit the wall with his gauntlet covered fist.

It still hurt.

“We believe he escaped during the battle, or even before it; most likely in a hurry as our advance was quicker than he, or we, had expected it to be.”

“Before or during, it doesn’t matter. I wanted that treasonous bastard be brought to justice.” Teddy growled. “He should pay for all of the bloodshed he caused. The way in which he sacked Birdenbergh it was…”

“It was barbaric, sire.”

Teddy just nodded grimly.

“There was a large stable in the outer bailey, wasn’t there?” Teddy asked and rubbed his face.

“Indeed there was.”

“Put those who surrendered there for the time being, we’ll sort that mess out later.”

“Yes, your majesty.”

“And George,” Teddy glanced at his adjutant. “Any kind of cruel or retaliatory measures towards the rebels are expressly forbidden. I won’t have any of our soldiers descending to the level of Lord Norris and his ilk. Many of those who fought for Norris were forced to do so out of fear, or did it because of lies.”

“Of course, sire.”

“Tell the men that I’ll hang them by their balls if they break my will.” Teddy stated gruffly.

George just nodded with a bemused smile and then continued in a more serious tone. “I just came down from upper levels; I believe we found Lord Norris’ rooms.”

“Show me.” Teddy ordered and his posture straightened immediately.

George turned on his heels and led the way. As they passed one of their knights George relayed the orders to him, and after a quick bow to Teddy the knight left to carry out his orders. As they ascended the stairs both men kept their swords unsheathed; you never knew where a lone enemy soldier might have been hiding and waiting.

When they reached the right floor they came across few men from Teddy’s troops and he ordered them to follow. As they reached a thick, polished door, Teddy told the foot soldiers to stay on guard outside and the young King and his adjutant entered.

The first room, some sort of an anteroom, was a mess and it looked ransacked. Whether it had been looted by his men or even by Lord Norris’ Teddy didn’t know nor particularly cared and they moved on to the inner, main room. It was a spacious and opulent room, or it was opulent when compared to the rest of the foreboding castle. Tapestries covered the walls and a large canopy bed dominated the general view, other smaller pieces of upturned furniture filled the remaining space. The room however could have been full of gold and still the only thing Teddy would have dragged out with him would have been the owner of the bedchamber; Lord Norris himself.

Teddy walked slowly among the litter covered floor, occasionally shifting some of the rubbish with the tip of his sword or squatting down to pick up and inspect a piece of parchment. There were few books on the floor, strewn here and there, and Teddy gently picked them up, dusting them clean. He passed them to George who took them and placed them into a bag he picked up from the floor. Teddy liked riding and swordplay as much as any other man of his age, but books were one of his secret passions, a fact that George knew well. And so, he didn’t even raise an eyebrow when being given the books. Some books however weren’t enough to quell the King’s anger.

There was a silver goblet under an upturned table and Teddy picked it up, it felt heavy in his gauntlet covered hand. Was it originally Norris’ cup, or stolen from some unfortunate soul, Teddy didn’t know.

It still felt satisfying to throw the thing against the wall.

“Fuck!” He growled.

Teddy’s rage however was immediately assuaged when the heavy silver cup hit the tapestry covered wall. Instead of a muted clang, there was a deep thump. As the now deformed goblet fell to the floor he slowly walked over to the wall, looking it with suspicion.

“There’s something behind there.” Teddy whispered to George, who nodded and crept towards the wall with similar misgivings.

The King’s adjutant looked up and pointed at the fastenings holding the tapestry up; it would come down with a hard yank. Teddy nodded and took a step back, making sure the damn thing would not fell on him. George passed his sword to Teddy and took a firm hold of the woven, colourful cloth with both of his hands and yanked it firmly. The whole thing came down with one pull, sending a large cloud of dust into the air as it landed on the dirty floor.

A door was revealed, a solid pine door in a small niche. There was no lock, but there was a sturdy looking latch keeping the door shut.

Teddy passed George’s sword back to him and nodded to the man. He took hold of the latch and looked at the King who again nodded silently. George slid the metal latch open and pulled the heavy door wide open to reveal a smallish room.

It was gloomy, cold, miserable looking chamber, more like a cell or storeroom rather than an actual room. There were shelves on both walls, bathed in the dimmest of light that fell from a window high near the ceiling; it wasn’t even a proper window, just a glazed arrow loop really.

Assortment of different kind of valuables had been stacked on the shelves Teddy noted as he slowly walked into the room, sword still in his hand. Jewellery, golden objects and silverware was strewn here and there in surprising quantities; most likely plundered on one of the rebellious Lord’s raids. The fact that they still were in the room suggested that Lord Norris had indeed left in a hurry. Teddy stopped at the point where the shelves ended and the room opened into a slightly larger space and by standing still for a moment he allowed his eyes to become more accustomed to the dim lighting of the chamber. But then he heard, or rather felt something.

There was someone else in the room with him; someone who wasn’t George.

“Show yourself.” Teddy growled.

Nothing happened.

Teddy’s eyes scanned the room with fierce intensity until finally he spotted the person hiding in the gloom.

There was someone keeping themselves hidden in the corner. There was no knight there, standing up with a raised sword ready to attack, nor was there a cocked crossbow aimed to his chest, ready to be fired. No, someone was huddled in the corner and Teddy took a step closer, his heavy boots making a deep thump in the small space as he slowly prowled closer.

A pitiful sight met his eyes.

On a thin straw mattress there sat a boy, or a young man, clothed only in a knee length linen shirt. He looked filthy and his dark hair was messy and shiny from grease. The boy was shuddering like a leaf, wielding a small and broken knife - practically a toy - with both of his trembling hands. Teddy doubted whether the small blade could pierce even the surcoat on him, let alone his mail.

Teddy lowered his sword and sheathed it.

It wasn’t the small stature of the boy or the fact that he could pose no threat to a large man like Teddy that made the King put away his sword. It wasn’t even the look on the boy’s gaunt, ashen face; he looked terrified, utterly and absolutely horrified by the mail covered man in front of him. His cracked, dry lips were nothing but white lines, just as pale as the rest of him. None of those facts were the reason why Teddy lowered his blade.

No, it was the boy’s eyes: the King had seen that same look in the eyes of horribly injured people. The amber brown eyes looked broken, so broken and tired. Like he had given up and was just waiting for something, something to end the torment; something which Teddy’s sword might have been able to provide.

The boy’s eyes shifted over to George who had entered the room and was now standing behind his king. The huddled figure started to shake even more and with a flick of his hand Teddy told his adjutant to get back, which he did with a small nod.

Teddy removed his gauntlets and dropped them onto the floor; he then slowly walked closer and kneeled in front of the boy.  It was a reckless thing to do, really. His throat was now somewhat exposed and with a quick surge the boy could stick his knife into Teddy’s neck. But instead of attacking, the boy just withdrew his knees even closer to his chest, trying to curl into a tight, little ball.

Even on his knees Teddy towered over the boy and it wasn’t a posture he wanted to do as he was reasonably convinced that it just made the boy even more scared. So, Teddy held his arms loosely at his side and his expression soft, hoping to give to the huddled figure some sort of assurance that he was not a threat.

“Hello.” Teddy said gently. “My name is Theodore, but you can call me Teddy. Who might you be?”

Only thing Teddy heard in the room was the boy’s laboured, almost panicked breathing.

“Do you understand me?” Teddy asked and then quickly added: “You don’t have to speak; you could just nod. If you want to.”

The boy nodded minutely, his eyes never leaving Teddy.

“So you understand me?” Teddy asked.

The boy nodded again.

“Good. I know you are scared, I mean, I would be if I were in your place, but we aren’t here to hurt you. We just want to help.” Teddy spoke softly. “ _I_ want to help you.” He added.

The boy shuddered and his mouth opened and then closed; no sound came out. Teddy had looked around and he hadn’t spotted any kind of source of water in the room; the boy had to be parched.

“Just take your time, there’s no hurry.” Teddy gently spurred.

Again the boy opened his mouth, and then with a hoarse whisper he croaked; “Billy.”

“Billy.” Teddy repeated. “Your name is Billy.”

The bo- No, not the boy, _Billy_ nodded.

“Hello, Billy.” Teddy nodded and glanced down at Billy’s hands; he was still holding the small knife, clutching it with enough force to turn his knuckles white. Not that you could see the difference; he was so pale.

“I was just wondering if…” Teddy lifted his gaze back up. “If you could give that knife to me?”

Billy tried to pull back as much as the stone walls would allow, which was none. He just stared Teddy with fear, eyes full of hurt and the broken blade just shook more. Billy’s eyes followed Teddy’s every movement and even the tiniest of them caused the boy to flinch.

Teddy raised his right hand, palm up, to show that he meant no harm, and then lifted his left in similar way.

“May I take the knife?” Teddy softly queried.

Billy continued to shake, there was no answer to the King's query and so Teddy decided to risk it and moved closer. He brought his hands near Billy’s and left them there hovering; not touching but keeping his hands close.

“I’m going to take the knife now?” Teddy partly asked, partly told.

He gently brought his hands to cup Billy’s and the raven haired boy made a broken sound when Teddy’s large hands covered his trembling ones.

“It’s alright; I’m not going to hurt you.” Teddy whispered.

Billy’s hands were cold. Almost icy and so thin that Teddy suspected that the gaunt, sallow appearance wasn’t just a result of lack of sunlight.

Teddy curled his fingers around Billy’s hands and then slowly, with care and gentleness, he pressed his thick thumbs between the knife’s hilt and Billy’s palms and pried the trembling hands apart.

The boy’s breathing had gone so shallow that it almost sounded as if he wasn’t breathing at all.

With his left hand Teddy gently plucked the knife out of Billy’s now loosened grip and tossed the blade aside where it landed on the stone floor with a small clink.

“There we go.” The King smiled softly; looking at Billy’s hands he pressed them back together with his own. Billy’s hands were now palm to palm between Teddy’s large ones, completely covered by them.

“Your hands are a tad cool. We need to get them warm or you’ll get sick.” Teddy hummed and raised his eyes back to Billy’s.

There were tears in his eyes and he was shaking just as much as previously.

“Please…” Billy croaked weakly. “Please don’t hurt me. No more… please.”

Teddy felt anguish twisting in the pit of his stomach. “No, Billy. I’m no-”

But before he could finish, Billy’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and his jaw dropped against his chest. As his unconscious body could not fall backwards or to its side, it fell forward into Teddy’s arms and he made a small surprised sound when Billy’s unconscious face hit his stomach. The King however quickly sprang into action and gathered the boy in his arms.

He was thin, so awfully thin that Teddy feared that he was going to break the poor boy if he wasn’t gentle enough. As Teddy slipped his arms around Billy, one arm under his knees and one under his back, and stood up, carrying the boy in bridal style, he noticed the boy’s weight. Or the lack thereof; he weighed absolutely nothing.

Yes, Teddy was a large, strong man, but the fact that he could pick Billy up like a child would pick up a ragdoll; it was a disconcerting thought. Even though Teddy estimated him to be only slightly shorter than an average person, and probably not that much younger than he himself was, Billy was far too thin. He had been with too little to eat for a good while; no one came this weak and famished from skipping a meal, or two. And why was Billy like this?

There was no need for guesswork. Teddy knew exactly who was to blame.

As he was about to turn and leave he noticed a small cloth bundle in the dark corner where it had been hidden behind Billy’s back. The King kneeled to investigate and kept the boy pressed against his chest but allowed Billy’s legs to momentarily fall onto the floor as he opened the bundle with his left hand.

Teddy’s heart broke when he opened the dirty piece of fabric and saw its contents.

There were no great treasures or secrets inside, only two things; a small, dried apple, and an even smaller piece of stone hard, inedible looking bread.

Teddy looked down at the boy in his arms and his heart ached. Billy had guarded those barely edible looking morsels of food like they were made of gold and silver. Even in a situation where someone with a sword had entered his small world, Billy had protected the scraps of food diligently.

Again Teddy gathered the unconscious boy to his lap and stood up, trying to calm himself down. He wasn’t going to cry, he wasn’t. This wasn’t the worst thing he had seen during this war, much worse things had happened and yet, in a way, this was worse than anything he had seen. This was deliberate and purposeful, not random, not just an unfortunate happenstance. No, Billy had been mistreated just for the hell of it.

Part of Teddy was filled with seething rage towards the man who was responsible of Billy’s pitiful state; Norris was going to pay dearly of his cruelty, of this and of all the other horrible things done by him and his treacherous troops.

Teddy closed his eyes for a moment and sighed heavily, then after few deep, calming breaths he walked out into the main room and squinted against the light in there; it felt far too bright after the gloom of the small chamber.

George looked at the figure in Teddy’s lap with furrowed brow. “How is he?”

“Not well. Not well at all.” Teddy said quietly and then nodded towards Norris’ ornately decorated canopy bed. “Could you pass that blanket to me?”

George fetched the blanket and helped Teddy to wrap it around the unconscious boy.

“He’s so light.” Teddy whispered. “Barely weighs anything.”

George nodded grimly and headed for the door. “You might not need the healers help, sire. But I do believe he does.”

“Indeed.” Teddy nodded and made sure that Billy’s head rested comfortably against his shoulder. Well, as comfortably as it could against a mail covered shoulder.

As they walked out of the keep and into the bailey few of his knights and some of the foot soldiers stared, but none said anything. Teddy left George to handle the situation at the castle and he himself headed back to the war camp. As he walked out of the gate and left the relatively protected outer bailey the cold autumn wind blew against Teddy and he was glad that he had wrapped the blanket around Billy. Teddy doubted whether the boy was hale enough to withstand even a common cold, let alone something more serious. And so, the King hastened his stride and headed back to his tent.

Few of the men who were already dismantling the heavy siege equipment - trebuchets being the largest of them - cheered as their king passed them. Teddy’s grim expression however muted most of them rather quickly, and those who were lazing about on top of the earthworks which had provided cover for the attackers soon looked busy and active, thinking that the King’s ire was directed at them.

King Theodore III was loved by his people and by his troops. When he had been crown prince people had called him Prince Teddy and later, unsurprisingly, he came to be known as King Teddy.

A nickname that he himself held in high regard.

He was known to be a gentle and kind ruler with fierce sense of justice and above all, immensely reasonable and level-headed. But when the King was having a bad day, as he now looked to have, most people knew to leave him be and steered clear of him.

When Teddy reached his tent he entered it with a small nod to the sentries and walked over to his campaign bed, passing a tub full of hot, steaming water that the servants had prepared for him. He gently lowered Billy on the bed which was sturdier, and softer, than most of its kind. A small piece of luxury amidst war but damn if he was going to sleep on some bloody rickety thing months on end!

One of the servants walked in and bowed in respect. Teddy immediately sent him to fetch the healer and moments later the servant returned with the elderly healer and his young pupil.

“Master Burnley.” Teddy nodded to the old man.

“Your Majesty.” He bowed his head, as did his pupil.

“I’m sorry I trouble you with this. You must be busy with all of the wounded, even with the other healers, but I must insist if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all, sire. I am your personal physician after all.” He glanced at Billy who still remained unconscious. “I gather he needs my help. You seem to be hale and hearty as always.”

“I’m fine.” Teddy sighed, then turned to Billy and brushed the boy’s hair out of his eyes. “But he isn’t.”

“Well then, I must begin.” Master Burnley walked over to his patient and his pupil followed with a large case full of remedies and potions.

“If you do not mind, sire. I would like to see to my patient in private.”

Teddy nodded, of course he could stay if he so wished, he was the King after all. But because Billy could not give an answer whether or not he wanted anyone else, beside the healer and his aide in the tent, Teddy decided to head out.

“Use anything you need.” Teddy said before stepping out. “If you need assistance just ask one of the servants, and feel free to use the tub. I’ll wash myself in one of my captains’ tent.”

“Thank you, sire.” Burnley nodded.

“His name is Billy.” Teddy said, looked at the boy for a moment, and headed out.

 

 

A bit over an hour and a half later Teddy walked back to his tent, the sky had darkened as evening fell. His tent was lit by lanterns inside and few torches outside, making it look like a safe haven in the cool autumn evening. Teddy felt marginally better, having washed away the blood, filth, and sweat of the day. He had also changed into more comfortable clothing and shrugged off his armour, but still carried his sword with him, just in case.

Sentries outside his tent nodded to their king, they were different ones than earlier; guard shift of the previous ones had ended while Teddy had been away. The air inside the tent felt warm, this thanks to the glowing braziers inside. Well, it was warm when compared to the damp coolness that reigned supreme outside.

Burnley’s aide was gone Teddy noted when he entered the tent. Only the healer remained and he nodded when the King approached the bed.

“Sire.”

“How is he?” Teddy asked, keeping his voice down.

“Better, now that he is here.” Burnley sighed. “But only slightly. He is in quite poor state, he’s underweight and there are bruises and scars across his body. We bathed him, treated his wounds, and managed to feed some broth to him.”

“The bruises; show them to me.” The King sighed. He wanted to see the damage personally.

Burnley lifted the thick blankets and Teddy saw that Billy had clean, soft looking clothes on him; they looked too big for him. Yet again Teddy felt anger bubbling inside him for the treatment of the poor boy.

“My aide had some extra clothes with him and he fetched them for the boy to wear.”

Burnley’s aide wasn’t a large man and still his clothes looked far too big on Billy.

“Relay my gratitude to him.”

Burnley nodded and lifted the linen undershirt to reveal a thin, frail body and Teddy clenched his fists, his fingernails were digging small crescents to the palms of his hands.

Billy wasn’t just thin, he was practically emaciated and to make matters worse, his pale skin was covered in bruises and cuts. Some were old and some were new, the colouring of the bruising ranged from almost recently appeared dark purple to sickly hues of green and yellow. Many of them looked like they resulted from hits with a fist or with a belt. One even looked to be a result of a boot heel, as if someone had just stamped down with his foot, driving the heel into the soft skin.

“It’s the same story on his back.” Burnley said quietly. “Cuts there are unfortunately more numerous.”

“Are they…” Teddy asked and swallowed thickly.

“Made with purpose?” Burnley looked at Teddy. “I’d say so. They are too shallow and precise to be the result of a fight, made only with intention of hurting.” He sighed.

Teddy rubbed his face with both hands and took few deep breaths.

“Nothing but mindless torture.” Teddy muttered to no one particular.

“There is one more thing, sire.” Burnley said and looked pityingly at the boy.

“More?” Teddy whispered and looked at Burnley, then at the figure on his bed.

Burnley nodded. “He’s been assaulted.”

Teddy’s brow furrowed. “Well of course he has, I can see tha-”

Then the penny dropped.

“Raped?” Teddy asked with a hoarse whisper.

Burnley nodded. “Assulted or th-”

“Raped.” Teddy growled. “Let’s call it what it is.”

“Of course, sire.” Burnley replied and continued quietly. “He’s been raped or the person who slept with him was unnecessarily rough.”

“When did this happen, in your estimate?” Teddy asked and sat onto the edge of the bed, gently pulling the shirt back down and covering Billy’s small body with a layer of blankets.

“The most recent one would have happened probably few days ago.” Burnley sighed.

_The most recent one..._

 

Teddy closed his eyes and hung his head low. Of course there had been more than one instance.

“Anything else?” Teddy asked with sudden weariness.

 

_Wasn’t this day ever going to end?_

 

“No, sire. That is all.”

“Good.” Teddy swallowed thickly. “Does he need more of your attention or will he manage on by himself.”

“The cuts and bruises are already healing and so there is nothing else for me to do. He requires plenty of rest and a decent meal,” Burnley glanced at Billy with a small, sad smile. “Or two.”

Teddy nodded and covered Billy’s hand that was lying on top of the bedcoverings with his own.

“He should not start eating with anything too hearty; broth and porridge with moderation for the first few days, after that he can proceed to something more substantial.”

“Thank you master Burnley.” The King smiled tiredly at the old man.

“Your Majesty.” The healer bowed.

“Keep him warm, sire.” Burnley added as he was leaving. “I fear that even a slightest of colds could be fatal, his constitution is simply too weak.”

Teddy nodded mutely and the old healer left. Now it was just the two of them in the tent and Teddy gently lifted the bedcoverings and slipped Billy’s hand under them. He still looked cold and shivered slightly in his sleep; the tent and the thick blankets just weren’t cutting it.

Billy was simply too thin to stay warm just by himself in the coolness of the tent. Getting him back to the castle wasn’t an option either, for the rooms had been unheated and it would take days to drive the cold and damp away from the thick stone walls.

So, Teddy did what he could; he dragged couple of the braziers nearer to the bed, as close as he dared, moved some of the lanterns to dim the area around the bed, and finally kicked off his boots. He took off his belt along with the tunic and after a moment of hesitation he slipped under the blankets, gathering Billy gently against his chest. Teddy spooned the boy from behind and wrapped one of his thick arms around him, warming him up. Now that the only things separating them were their trousers and linen undershirts, and Teddy could actually feel how thin Billy was; it all became so horribly real. Billy was barely more than skin and bones, so horribly skinny when compared to his own muscular, well fed body.

A surge of protectiveness coursed through Teddy as he breathed in Billy’s fresh from the bath scent. No one was going to hurt the boy in his arms ever again, not if he had anything to say in the matter.

No one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the first chapter, the next one is already written but in need of polishing. It will be out within a week. 
> 
> I’m not sure how long this story will be in its entirety, few chapters at least. It will have a definite ending though, despite its length or lack thereof. I don’t want to leave people hanging. I’ve already come up with some things I want to include but no hard plans exist, so updates will be random. 
> 
> If you liked this story you might want to check out my other story Under the Northern Sky, which is set during the Second World War. It’s a historically accurate story about lesser known parts of WWII. So the setting is quite different from this story.
> 
> Here’s a link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10034450/chapters/22363433
> 
> If you want to criticize, have suggestions or just want to chat; do leave a comment.
> 
> Have a happy new year!


	2. Chapter 2

///\\\\\

 

Billy felt warm and comfortable; a rare and pleasant feeling in his life and he kept his eyes closed. He wasn’t lying on his own thin straw mattress, the bed he was in was soft and smelled clean, and so it had to be Lord Norris’ bed. Billy had apparently spent the whole night next to the lord. It sometimes happened. After having his way with him, Norris would forget that Billy was still in his bed and he would just fell asleep on him; leaving Billy to lie there like a salt statue. Though it usually only occurred when the lord was blind drunk.

It was only after when Billy tried to move his body to a better position that he noticed the arm around him; Lord Norris was still in bed holding him, and as always, Billy knew to stay still. The longer the lord was asleep, the longer Billy’s temporary reprieve would last. To take his mind off the situation, he found himself thinking of the dream he had had last night.

It wasn’t like one of his usual nightmares, or dreams in which he soared high above clouds and walked in a quiet forest. No, this had been a strange and unusual, and yet, compelling dream.

A large man, clad in mail which had been covered by a dark green surcoat, had entered his room. Surely he was there to put him down; Billy remembered his dream-self thinking. But no, as he had walked closer Billy had seen him better, with golden hair and blue eyes, eyes that had kindness in them; the man had kneeled in front of him and told him his name. Billy could not recall the name, as hard as he tried, but he remembered the handsome face. The angular, strong jaw, soft looking lips, the man’s almost regal bearing. He also recalled the large hands that had so gently taken his own shaking ones between them. So gently in fact, that Billy had at that point realised it was all a dream; no one had ever touched him with such care. He didn’t remember much after that, only thick, strong arms, under and around him, carrying him away from the cold, dark chamber.

 

_If only._

 

Finally Billy’s moment of peace ended when the arm holding him withdrew. Lord Norris was awake and Billy tried to relax his body; either the lord was going to fuck him, or literally kick him off the bed. It didn’t matter which of the options it was going to be, resisting would just make it worse. And if there was one thing Billy had learned in the past three years, it was that what Lord Norris wanted, Lord Norris got.

Billy pretended to be asleep, not that it had ever worked as a way to prolong the inevitable. The only times when Norris left Billy in his bed was when he didn’t realise that his lay was still there and left in a hurry, called away to attend some important business. Billy relished those moments, for they allowed him to be selfish and laze in the soft bed for a few fleeting moments. This would not be one of those times because of course he had been noticed, and Billy felt the bed dip a bit as the lord stood up.

Then there was the sound of rustling of clothes and steps leaving the bed, leaving Billy by himself. Where was the kick, the order to make himself scarce? The order for him to slink back to his cell?

_No_ , not cell, cells and rooms were for prisoners and for people. Billy wasn’t even a prisoner; even they eventually got their freedom or ended up with a noose around their neck. No, he existed for Lord Norris’ enjoyment, a thing to be kept out of sight, only to be taken out when needed; an object. Objects were kept in storerooms. Why wasn’t he being told to return to his place of storage?

There were quiet voices nearby; it was probably one of the servants bringing breakfasts to the lord of the castle. The servants hardly ever even glanced at Billy. He was the lord’s favourite toy, a pet; nothing more.

In a way Billy found it easier to just be invisible. During those rare occasions when the servants did look at him; Billy could only see disgust in their eyes. So, to be regarded as a part of the furnishings, to be viewed with indifference, it was better than to be Lord Norris’ fuck toy.

When the smell of porridge and fresh bread filled Billy’s nostrils, he knew that his guess had been a correct one. Not that it mattered though; his breakfast would be scraps of whatever Lord Norris saw fit to give to him. It was never much, just enough to keep him alive. The lord had said that he didn’t want his precious little treasure getting fat. So, Billy tried to pretend that the smell of food was not there, that it was just a figment of his imagination. Of course it never worked, he was always hungry; a fact that Lord Norris knew well. The smell of food was just one his more subtle ways of tormenting Billy.

Billy kept his eyes closed, but felt his stomach grumbling and he tried to prevent it from making any noise; Lord Norris hated when his dear pet was so greedy and usually the grumblings of his stomach ended with a meal withheld. Of course the lord knew perfectly well, as did everyone, that trying to prevent a hungry stomach from grumbling was like trying to will away the sunrise; useless. But Norris was nothing but inventive when it came to thinking up reasons to hurt Billy.

Then finally his stomach growled with such noise that it had to be heard on the other side of the room.

It had been heard. Steps got closer and Billy tried to prevent himself from shaking. Lord Norris was going to say something with mock gentleness; he would chide Billy for being too greedy and Billy would have to try to assure him that he wasn’t being greedy, that it was an accident and so on, and so on… And if he would beg and grovel hard enough he might get his share of the food.

He felt a presence next to the bed and he prepared himself for the inevitable. But instead of Lord Norris’ agonizingly familiar voice, there was a voice of a stranger:

“Good morning.” A deep, soft voice said. The voice, Billy thought, sounded vaguely familiar.

Trying to calm himself, Billy took few deep breaths and opened his eyes. First he was confused, and then scared.

He wasn’t in Lord Norris’ bed, not in his room, not even in the castle; he was in a foreign tent. As he looked up, he could see the tent’s roof moving with the breeze and he could hear birds singing. Billy felt numb, for he had almost forgotten how the singing of birds sounded; the world outside his room and Norris’ bedchamber had turned into a vaguely familiar concept, nothing more. However, Billy quickly pushed the shock away because this was not the time to get distracted. He slowly turned his head, lying there in the unfamiliar bed, and finally saw the man who had spoken.

It was the man from his dream.

Standing there tall, looking just as big and strong as he had in Billy’s dream; short, golden blond hair, strong jaw, blue eyes, same everything. As Billy took in the imposing figure in front of him, he noticed the man’s clothing. He was wearing a simple, dark-green tunic that hugged his thick arms, wide shoulders and strong chest like it was moulded on him. The cloth tugged across the sort of bulging muscles one would think more likely to find on a field hand. He was a man who’d clearly been well fed as he grew up; that sort of body was raised on good meat and fresh bread, _and_ with hours of practise in sword fighting and other martial arts.

The man was a knight, or more likely a lord.

Billy was sure of it when he noticed that he wore a leather belt just above his hips, the symbol of his knighthood and high standing. There was no sword hanging off the belt, but the leather loops for the scabbard were there on the left side. His trousers, fit for riding, hugged his meaty thighs and on his feet he wore boots that looked worn, but meticulously cared and kept. His clothing was deceptively simple and yet, Billy knew the man was someone of power and means.

It was the little things that gave it away; the absolute form fittingness of the clothes was one indication, the other, more important one was the piping on the mouth of his sleeves and on the fringe of his tunic’s high collar. You only achieved that glint of pure grey with real silver thread. And finally, the way in which he carried himself with an air surety of one who had spent a lifetime in absolute certainty of his place in the world. The man oozed confidence and strength and he was clearly a person who knew his own power, both physical and political, well.

All in all, he looked like he could snap Billy in half, and Billy was in his bed.

He shuddered. Not knowing how he had ended in the bed, he hoped, _hoped_ so hard that this was the place he was supposed to be. He hadn’t been ordered to leave the bed, but maybe he should have had. Billy wished he wouldn’t be punished; even one slap with one of the man’s large hands would break something in his face, of this he was certain.

Suddenly he was even more unsure and scared, well, more than he usually was. Where was he? Where was Lord Norris?

“Good morning.” The large man said again. “How are you feeling?”

Was… Was _he_ being asked how he was feeling? Billy felt confused, maybe there was someone standing on the other side of the bed. Maybe the question was meant for them. But the man kept looking at him, smile on his lips. Smile that, Billy thought, looked almost gentle and patient…

Billy gathered what little remained of courage, rose to sit on the edge of the bed with his hands on his lap, and stuttered out an answer. “I…” A pregnant pause followed. “I…”

He licked his dry lips and tried again a third time. “I’m Billy.”

Oh no. No, no no! The man hadn’t asked his name, no one cared about his name. The man wanted to know his condition nothing more. A simple, straightforward answer was the only thing Billy should have given. He had made a mistake, would he be punished? Billy didn’t want to be punished.

The man however, he just smiled. “I know. We met yesterday.”

“We did?” Billy whispered. “Sir.” He quickly added, remembering his place.

 

_The dream!_

 

The man nodded. “Yes. Do you know who I am?”

Billy felt fear gripping his heart. They had met, so Billy was supposed to know the man’s name. He had forgotten this important, powerful man’s name and now he was supposed to know it, and he didn’t know it, and… _Oh no, please no_.

“I don’t, sir.” Billy whispered meekly. “I’m sorry, I don’t know who… I’m sorry.”

But instead of slapping him for the insolence, the man just chuckled gently. “You were out like a snuffed candle when we met yesterday. So I’m not surprised you don’t recall my name. I’m Theodore, but you can call me Teddy.”

Billy just stared for a second; _Teddy_ , not sir. It would be weird to call this powerful lord by his first name but he would do whatever he was ordered to. He always did. The name did however sounded vaguely familiar, but Billy couldn’t put his finger on why.

“Back to my first question,” Teddy said. “How are you feeling?”

Before Billy could answer, his stomach did the answering for him; it made an almighty growl.

“Hungry,” Teddy laughed softly, it didn’t sound mocking. “I would guess.”

“I’m sorry.” Billy whispered timidly.

Teddy just smiled gently. “Nothing wrong with that. Come, the breakfast is served.”

Breakfast? For- For him?

Billy dutifully stood up, feeling wobbly and weak from hunger; still he headed after the blond, leaving the comfortable bed with a quick, longing glance. It was only then he noticed his clothes, warm and well-made clothes covered his body. He even had thick woolly socks on his feet that kept them warm on the rug covered ground. It was so long ago since he had worn something else than dirty shirts that barely hid his modesty. Billy felt like crying, but men like Norris hated crying, at least when they were the ones not causing it, and Billy didn’t want to see how Teddy would react if he started to weep there and then.

He walked closer to the table and on it there were brown clay bowls, two of them. The other was filled with fluffy looking porridge, and second one was full of buttered pieces of bread, they were so fresh that they were still steaming. And suddenly Billy was _so_ hungry.

There were also two cups, and plates with spoons on the table, and a pitcher full of dark liquid, ale perhaps. It was then that he realised it; the food wasn’t for him, he was just supposed to watch.

Someone else was coming to share breakfast with Teddy and Billy knew his place. He stepped away from the table, trying to make himself as invisible and unobtrusive as possible.

Teddy looked at him with something akin to pity. “Billy, you can sit at the table. It’s for you.” He nodded at the setting.

 

_For me?_

 

Billy swallowed thickly. To sit at the table with a lord like Teddy, it was… beyond peculiar. Also the simple act of sitting while eating felt strange. It was so long ago since he had actually eaten whilst sitting by a table, _years_.

Was this a test by his new… What was Teddy to him; was he his new master? Owner? Had Lord Norris given him away or had he been won as a prize in a game of chance? Maybe Lord Norris had lost the war; Billy had heard the rumours about a war. Maybe Teddy was some other powerful lord who had conquered Norris on a field of battle, claiming Billy as his bounty. That seemed reasonable; Billy vaguely remembered hearing muffled noises to his room. Maybe the castle had been taken.

Billy’s moment of thought ended when a strong hand landed on his shoulder.

“Would you like to have something to eat?” Teddy asked gently.

“Yes, please.” Billy whispered and looked up as Teddy softly guided him to his seat.

 

_Why is he being so gentle?_

 

In his seat, Billy kept his hands on his lap, wringing them minutely, while trying to not stare at the heaps of food on the table.

“Would you like to have some?” Teddy asked, scooped up a generous amount of porridge with a ladle and looked at Billy.

Billy swallowed thickly and nodded. More porridge than Billy had ever been given was deposited on his plate.

“More?” Teddy queried. His voice was just as soft and gentle as before.

Billy’s eyes shot at Teddy and he licked his lips nervously. Was this a test? Did Teddy want see how greedy he was? How much he dared to ask when he had not done anything to deserve it.

“I…” Billy whispered. What he had to lose? Nothing; was the answer. So, Billy pushed his luck. “Yes, please.”

Teddy nodded almost encouragingly and more porridge was put on his plate. Teddy also helped himself to a generous portion and tuck in. Billy slowly picked up a spoon, keeping his eyes on the lord to see if he was doing something wrong. He had not been given permission to start eating, but the large man saw his action and didn’t stop him, so Billy yet again risked it and went forth.

He slowly brought the spoon to his mouth, still half expecting an order to stop; none came. And when the taste of warm porridge filled his mouth Billy wanted to cry. It was so good, fluffy and soft, yet hearty and filling. Billy tucked in like a man starving, which he more or less was. He didn’t notice when Teddy, with a small smile, poured his cup full and passed one of the small breads to him. Billy just kept wolfing down his portion, almost unconsciously taking a bite of the piece of bread that had appeared next to his plate. He even grabbed another one of the small breads from the bowl. When taking a sip from his cup he noticed the taste, it was ale, but almost sweet and fruity. Billy kept eating and eating, relishing the taste and abundance of food, he just lost himself.

It wasn’t until he felt full, fuller than he had felt in years, that he finally stopped. However, that content feeling one got after a good meal quickly turned into one of apprehension and fear.

He had just stuffed his greedy face with more food than he normally ate in two or three days, he might have even grabbed one of the small breads from the bowl without permission. Billy looked at the blond, expecting his expression to be one of displeasure, but instead of that, he was smiling brightly.

“Well, someone was hungry.” He chuckled.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be so greedy.” Billy whispered, again wringing his hands in his lap.

“You weren’t being greedy.” Teddy said softly. “You were hungry.”

Billy nodded meekly and was about to speak when an intense feeling of nausea filled him. He was going to be sick. Billy shot up, he had to get out!

But before he could barely even push his chair back he was violently sick. He bended forward, and after a few strong retches he had emptied the contents of his stomach onto the polished table, covering the table and the earthenware, everything, with his vomit. The sick got everywhere; it even dripped down from the table’s edge and onto the rugs, seeping into them.

The only thing that had prevented the mess from soaking his own feet were the strong arms which had pulled him away from the messy scene. Those thick arms were now keeping him upright on his wobbly feet, and for a fleeting moment, with absolute horror, Billy looked at the mess. The sickly sweet smell of bile filled his nostrils and the tent.

 

_No, no, no, nonono… Please, no._

 

The only thing he could do was to slip away from the arms holding him up, and get down onto his knees onto the rug covered ground. Billy pressed his face into the mat in utter submission and shivered. He had just horribly offended Teddy, a powerful lord and an important man by being sick on his table.

Billy decided not to even bother with begging; this was not a thing to be forgotten. He had to be punished and that was that. Billy felt tears falling down his face and into the rug. It was so unfair; he had just been hungry.

He found himself hoping that the beating wouldn’t kill him; one kick from Teddy’s boot would immediately break one or more of his ribs, making it hard for Teddy to have his way with him. So perhaps it would be just his face, Billy could still service his new lord even with eyes swollen shut.

Now more than ever Teddy’s size would become clear, but perhaps he wouldn’t completely wreck his new possession.

Billy felt the rug in front of him sift and Teddy kneeled in front of his shuddering figure.

“Please.” Billy whimpered, begging even if he wasn’t supposed to. “I won’t do it again, please.”

A strong, warm hand pressed against Billy’s cheek and to his eternal shame, Billy actually craned into the touch. It was perverse to seek comfort from the hand that was about to hurt him, but for a moment he just wanted to believe that it was meant as comforting gesture. That it was someone trying to help and care for him.

Teddy’s hand remained on his cheek, but a thick thumb slid under Billy’s jaw, and with what had to be faux gentleness, the hand lifted his face off the ground. Billy closed his eyes; he didn’t want to see the incoming fist.

“Billy, look at me, please.” Teddy ordered, even if he made it sound like a plea.

Billy opened his eyes, tears still running down his face.

Teddy’s expression was unreadable. If Billy would have had to guess, he would have said that Teddy was trying to hold back tears. But that couldn’t be true. So, the clenched jaw indicated only one thing; rage so incandescent that Billy again felt sick.

He was going to be hurt.

“Let’s get up.” Teddy ordered, and pulled Billy to his feet. He complied, rising haltingly to his knees, and then up to his feet. His eyes were huge with fear, and desperation, still wet. Teddy just grabbed a piece of cloth from the table and dabbed some of Billy’s tears away, then wiped his mouth clean.

Smart thing really; no one wanted sick on their knuckles.

The lord placed one large hand on Billy’s back and guided him towards the bed. Billy went numbly, still awaiting the forthcoming brutality he thought he deserved. He followed, as Teddy moved over to the edge of the bed and sat down onto the soft, clean blankets.

_Oh._

 

It was only then that Billy realised what the punishment was going to be. At least it was a punishment Billy understood.

He took his place on the bed and instantly eased back on his elbows, spreading his legs for Teddy to do whatever he wanted with his body. Billy had erred horribly and Teddy was obviously entitled to _take_ from him. Lord Norris had frequently used sex as a form of punishment, and Billy was well familiar with all the ways it could hurt. But small part of him still hoped Teddy not to cross the line that separated _punishment_ from _torture_.

Billy lay back, legs parted and bent loosely at the knees, his head tipped back to submissively bare his throat. Resisting had only ever spurred Norris on, made him even more brutal.

Teddy just stared at him, his expression was still unfamiliar.

“I’m sorry, is… Is this not to your liking?” Billy whispered. “Wou- Would you like me to be on my belly, or on my knees? O- Or do you want me to use my mouth?”

But instead of telling him to take whatever the position in which the lord might have enjoyed fucking him the most, Teddy moved forward, taking Billy’s left knee and pushing it in against his right to close to expectant, submissive spread of his legs. He bent forward, shakily taking Billy’s face in his trembling hands, his lips twitching in a low, mortified murmur.

“N-, no, Billy. No. I- I’m not going to…” Teddy whispered brokenly, blinking one too many times, a single drop of moisture escaping down his left cheek as he leaned close.

Billy lied on his back, eyes wide and stared at the lord in confused, conflicted pain, his lips parted slightly as he waited for the punishment that should have been forthcoming. Teddy swallowed hard, a shudder running up his spine as he stared into Billy’s shattered eyes, and he let out a raw, agonized breath.

“Please, Billy. Just get up.” Teddy whispered and pulled Billy into a sitting position, locking his eyes with Billy’s.

“Never...okay?” He managed in a cracked whisper. “I’m not going to rape you as punishment. _That_ should never be used as a punishment, do you understand?” He pressed desperately. “Lord Norris is a sick bastard for forcing himself onto you, for raping you as a punishment, a- and I’m never going to do that to you. Never.”

Teddy’s hold on his face almost unconsciously tightened his forehead pressing desperately to Billy’s as another soft, agonized tear slipped over the rim of his eyelid.

“Billy…” He started again, drawing in a shaking breath. “Why did you try to initiate that?” Teddy asked carefully.

Billy blinked sharply, breaking out of the haze of tension, fear, and shame. He’d been stock still until this moment, trying to process Teddy’s words, trying to understand why he wasn’t being hurt. He blinked again, letting out a tight breath. “I…” He started haltingly, his voice small, face ashen with fear and confusion and hurt.

“I had to.” Billy whispered. “You have the right to punish me, you own me and… I- if you fuck me then you don’t have to hit me or use the knife, and… And it hurts less and I… I just don’t want to be hurt. I promise I’ll behave. Please…” Billy sniffed. “I don’t…”

Teddy choked back a strangled sound that was something like a sob and pulled Billy into his arms, burying his face in the side of his neck. For some reason Billy went willingly, allowed to be held, and for some reason it felt _good_.

Billy was pressed against his broad chest, Teddy’s hands holding him as he clung to him, and Billy felt hot moisture slipping from under his lashes as it dropped down onto his neck. Teddy was crying, holding him, and _crying_...His hand slid shakily up dragging through Billy’s hair as he caught a breath, letting it out again- raw, and tremulous.

“I’m not going to hurt you…”

The words were low, and choked, and Billy felt something inside him crumble as Teddy’s strong, gentle arms held him firmly. His breath was hot on the side of Billy’s neck, his hands clinging to him like he’d never let go.

“I don’t own you... No one does. No one has the right to hurt you. I don’t have the right to hurt you...I promise I won’t hurt you...” Teddy whispered. “You don’t have to do this...you don’t have to submit or be afraid anymore.”

Billy felt Teddy swallowing hard, slowly lifting his head, not ever bothering to brush at the wetness across his cheeks. He leaned closer, touching his forehead to Billy’s as he caressed the other man’s cheek with a shaking hand. “Billy...I- I want to help you. I care about what happens to you, and whether or not you’re safe, and happy... I simply want to help.”

“But-” Billy started desperately, and Teddy’s shaking figure pressed closer, his hands taking his jaw a little more fully.

“Look at me.” Teddy pleaded, cutting him off with a note of agony in his voice. “Billy... look at me, please…”

Billy did.

“Listen…” He breathed. “I don’t ever want you to do that again...I don’t ever want you to feel like you have to do something to… to offer yourself to me or to anyone else as a punishment or otherwise. I will never hurt you; I just want to help you. I want to be your friend and help you.”

Teddy’s hand brushed softly over Billy’s sunken cheek, caressing him with all the tenderness in the world, his deep blue eyes holding a sea of care and hurt.

“I don’t own you and I don’t want to own you. I want you to be happy...I want you to get better, Billy... I want to see you free, and safe, and recovering from the things that monster did to you... that’s all… I will help you; keep you safe, if you want me to.” Teddy breathed. “That’s all I want... no favours, or pleasure, or sex. I just want you to be alright.”

Billy blinked, staring up at the large man as his words seeped into the cracks of his shattered soul, pouring over all the raw hurt, and fear like ice water on a burn. And suddenly, in a moment of weakness, Billy let the stinging in his eyes well yet again, and hot tears slid down his sunken cheeks. He tipped his head forward, breaking out of his stillness as he leaned into Teddy’s touch, and something like a sob escaped his throat. His arms twitched at his sides, before his desperation for comfort overtook him and they came up, wrapping around Teddy’s neck.

He clung to him and pressed in, burying his face into the crook of Teddy’s neck, arms clinging to him in a desperate embrace. Billy trembled in his arms, muffling quiet, hitching sobs into his shoulder as Teddy held him in a firm and gentle hold.

 

_Gentle. Teddy is so gentle._

 

They sat there for a long time, Teddy murmuring words of comfort into Billy’s ear as he let himself cry. It was so long since he had cried properly; not trying to hide his frightened sobs or silently crying for his lot in the world. Billy cried because he could, he let it all out; the fear, the hurt, the agony of it all. And through it all Teddy’s fingers ran through his hair, his opposite hand massaging over the tension in his shoulders and back.

Billy felt safe. For the first time in his life Billy felt safe in someone else’s arms; in the arms of this gentle, caring man. He didn’t want to leave. He just wanted to be held.

“I’ll keep you safe.” Teddy murmured, after Billy’s hitching sobs calmed down a bit. “You don’t have to be afraid anymore.”

“You can’t promise that.” Billy whispered hoarsely, his voice affected by the crying. “There’s always someone more powerful than you.”

This was it.

This was Billy’s test; he had just outright said, not just insinuated that there was someone more powerful than Teddy. By questioning his strength and might, Billy might as well have spat in his face.

But instead of getting angry, Teddy smiled and dried Billy’s tears with his thumb.

“Do you know who I am?” Teddy softly asked, causing Billy’s brow to furrow.

“You are Theodore.” Billy said quietly. “Teddy?” He corrected himself with a note of uncertainty.

“I am.” Teddy laughed gently. “But what I mean is that… Norris is, _was_ , a lord. What do you think my tittle is?”

Billy swallowed. “It’s… It’s a lord. Isn’t it?”

“And why would you guess it to be that?” Teddy raised his eyebrow, with an amused smile. His eyes were still red from crying. Though, not so much as Billy’s own eyes were, probably.

“Because of your clothes.” Billy said. “Your clothes are far too well made for an ordinary knight. And this tent is large and comfortable; far too large and comfortable to a mere knight, so,” Billy shrugged minutely. “A lord.”

Teddy brushed the hair out of Billy’s eyes and smiled. “Good guess, but not a correct one. It’s a higher tittle than that of a lord.”

Billy’s eyes widened with shock. “You’re… You’re a baron.” Billy breathed out.

There were five Barons of the Realm in the kingdom, even lowly Billy knew that. All were powerful men, but they all were King’s men; impeccably loyal to their sovereign and prepared to defend his and the kingdom’s interests. Not anything like the multitude of lords and knights who liked to squabble over trivial matters. Or ended up betraying their King…

“Still a good guess, but not quite there.” Teddy smiled.

Billy was confused. Who was Teddy? Was he a foreign dignitary or a mercenary; a grand warlord from abroad that had defeated Lord Norris.

“Higher than a baron.” Teddy said levelly and a gentle hand moved to caress Billy’s cheek.

“What do you me-”

Then Billy understood.

“You are the King.” Billy whispered meekly, lowered his eyes and started to pull away, trying to get on his knees to show due deference. “Your Majesty.” Billy stuttered, but before he could get any further Tedd- the King pulled him back.

“Billy, look at me.” The King gently huffed and Billy ever so carefully raised his eyes back to his. “I think at this point we are past the usual forms of addressing. Wouldn’t you say so?”

“I…” Billy muttered weakly; he had no idea what to say. “I… I suppose. But… But why?”

“Because,” Teddy sighed. “Most people, if not all, call me Your Majesty or sire, or something similar. And sometimes… Sometimes I just want to be Teddy. So now that I have a friend, I want him to call me Teddy.”

“A friend.” Billy whispered.

Teddy just nodded and hugged him close.

Billy had a friend; a friend that hugged him. He had never had a friend.

His arms found their way around Teddy’s muscular torso and he actually sighed contently when the large man’s arms settled around him.

After a while Teddy mumbled into Billy’s hair. When had Billy buried his face against Teddy’s strong chest?

“What would you like to do?”

Suddenly Billy felt tired, he was so exhausted and weary. He just wanted to sleep for a week; the emotional and physical strain of the past hour had taken its toll on him.

“I… Could I sleep for a bit?” Billy asked quietly and glanced at the King.

“Of course.” Teddy said. “How about this; you take a nap and I’ll get us something to eat when you’re awake.”

Billy nodded minutely.

Teddy stood up to leave and Billy, without thinking, grabbed his wrist. When the King glanced at the thin hand clinging to his wrist, Billy quickly removed it.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…” Billy said quietly. “It was insolent of me t-”

“It’s fine.” Teddy said and gently took hold of Billy’s hand. “Would you like me to stay?”

A king was asking if Billy wanted him to stay; to be there until he fell to sleep.

Billy nodded timidly and Teddy sat on the edge of the bed as Billy slipped under the bedcoverings.

“Comfortable?” Teddy queried.

Billy was about to say yes, but then a small shiver shook him; after Teddy’s warm embrace everything felt cold.

“You are feeling cold.” Teddy simply stated, and again Billy nodded silently. “Would… would you like me to hold you for a moment?” Teddy asked. “To get you warm.” He quickly added.

Billy hesitated for a moment, until the need for warmth and comfort won.

“Yes, please.” Billy whispered and, to his astonishment, Teddy kicked off his boots and removed his belt and tunic. He wiggled behind the smaller man and after a second of indecision he pulled Billy against his body. He ended being snugly pressed against Teddy’s broad frame, his back against the King’s strong chest, and almost immediately he felt warm. Teddy was like a human furnace; keeping him warm against the chill and the dampness of autumn.

The King pulled the blankets over them and Billy burrowed into the blankets with a small content sigh; a first of its kind in a long time, perhaps ever.

“Teddy,” Billy asked quietly when he felt his eyes starting to droop.

The blond hummed in acknowledgment.

“Is… is this a d-” Billy tried, but his voice cracked. “Am I dreaming this?”

“No.” Teddy gently murmured and tightened his gentle hold. “I’m here, and I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Okay.” Billy mumbled sleepily. “Oka-” The yawn nearly dislocated his jaw.

Billy drifted to dreamless, restful sleep while he listened Teddy’s even, steady breaths; a lullaby of sorts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being more serious and rougher than I originally planned, but here it is anyway. Things will get better, you have my word.
> 
> I don’t have anything concrete to say about the next chapter. It exists (in my head), but I’m extremely busy for a while and so I don’t have much free time for writing. Therefore the next update is goodness knows when.
> 
> Do leave a comment if you have questions, criticism, suggestions etc.


	3. Chapter 3

///\\\\\

 

Teddy held Billy against him for a good while; not just until the boy fell asleep, but for almost an hour after that. He just lied there and listened as Billy’s breathing changed to deep and even inhales.

Eventually he had to get up; with some reluctance Teddy removed his arms from around Billy and slipped out of the bed, trying not to make too much noise. He gently tucked Billy back in and pulled the blankets right up to his chin, making absolutely sure that he was warm and covered right down to his toes.

For a moment he stood still and gazed at Billy, just taking him in. His face was bathed in soft golden-red light that was the result of the afternoon sun shining through the tent’s walls and ceiling. It left his face in soft relief, and made him look almost healthy.

Teddy knew better however; the light could do only so much in making him appear healthier.

Not only did the sunlight make Billy look slightly less sallow, it was also a welcome change to the infuriatingly drab weather that had plagued the campaign for weeks now. When it had not been raining, the miserable drizzle had turned into a continuous north-easterly gale; with violent gusts of wind causing even the most well anchored tents to collapse. Therefor it was no wonder that a good deal of Teddy’s men had caught the ague.

As he relished the change in weather, Teddy pulled his boots back on and picked up his tunic, putting it on and fastening its little clasps. He finished his outfit by girding his hips with the belt and tightening it firmly; he walked over to the tent’s door and called in one of the servants. When the retainer entered he simply glanced at the mess on and under the table and bowed courteously to the King.

Few minutes later the mess was cleared and on the table there was a fresh bundle of thyme and lavender to dispel any of the lingering smell of sick.

Teddy sat down at the table and with a cursory glance he went through the pile of reports and dispatches which the messenger had delivered earlier that morning. He picked one of the reports at random and started reading. It was a decently sized pile to be dealt with, but the heap of reading could have been thicker, much thicker in fact; if not for the fact that he had left his cousin in charge of things while he was away battling against Norris and his troops.

Cousin Steven had made an excellent job as a steward; he had made sure that the kingdoms affairs ran smoothly even in the absence of the King. Often Teddy found that he was glad of his decision to make Steven regent; for then he himself had been able to focus simply on warfare and the more mundane, less important parts of governing had been done by Steven with the powers invested to him by Teddy. In fact, he had a lot of power in his hands. Not only did he command the troops responsible of the defence of the capital, he also had all of the powers of a monarch; the right to convene the Diet, the final say in any legal decision made by a court of law and so on. The only rights he was left without were the right to declare war and the right to form treaties with foreign powers.

If it would have been any other person acting as the steward Teddy might have grown to regret his decision, for the position could be used as a steppingstone in a rebellious action. But he trusted Steven implicitly; he was loyal to a fault.

As Teddy was authorizing an order for a necessary removal of some grain from a nearby granary, George walked in. The King signed the order with his signature, _Theodore R_. and glanced at his adjutant.

“Good morning, your Majesty.” George said with a bow.

“Good morning to you too.” Teddy nodded back and put away his quill, flipping the inkwell’s lid shut. “How are things at the castle?”

“That’s what I was coming to inform you, sire. We now have the exact number of captives, and we have managed to separate the commanders of the rebels from the ordinary men.”

“How many defenders were there?”

“All in all, just under three hundred. Seven of them we would categorise as leaders; six of those were Norris’ vassal knights and one was a mercenary.”

“Less than three hundred.” Teddy huffed. “It felt like more.”

“Indeed.” George nodded. “But that’s what is always so deceptive when you lay siege; the enemy sees you and your troops, but you can’t see them.”

“So it means that Norris’ army disbanded earlier than we knew. His men just probably slipped away in the cover of darkness; deserted him and his lost cause. Good for them.” Teddy chuckled.

“Yes, they got away scot free. But that brings us back to the question at hand; how do you wish we deal with the captured rebels.”

“Let them go.” Teddy sighed. “The ordinary men.” He added. “The remaining leaders are to be brought to the capital with us, to be tried and convicted.”

“Sensible solution, sire. Leniency may prove to be a better way to show to those who still harbour rebellious thoughts that you are not their enemy. It’s the scheming lords like Norris and not the Crown that the people should be afraid of.”

“Mhmm.” Teddy hummed.

“It is good that you have continued on the path started by your grandfather and your mother. The key to making sure that the Crown survives lies not in the support of the nobility, but in the support of the common folk. They way in which the bond between the Crown and the people has strengthened in the past century or so, it means that the risk of insurrection by the men likes of Lord Norris has decreased. When your subjects have no antipathy towards the monarch or the Crown, it means that any attempts to incite them into rebellion against you will ultimately come to nothing.”

“Norris manged to do so.” Teddy sighed glumly.

“He did, sire.” George agreed. “But, he was one of the _Marcher_ Lord’s, and the fealty of the marches to the Crown, especially here in the north, has always been somewhat…” George shrugged minutely.

“Questionable.” Teddy added frankly.

“Exactly that, sire.”

“It’s not the peoples fault though.” The King said and ran a hand across his face.

“It’s the fact that as one of the Marcher Lords Norris had more powers and rights than your run of the mill lord, and could therefore slowly turn the people of his fief against me and the Crown. Whisper of dissent here, a rumour of the Crown’s ‘corruption’ there, silver given to the right people… If there is something I’m aiming to do during my reign, it is that the whole bloody system of Marcher Lords is done away with.” Teddy huffed sternly.

“The times when they needed their extra powers and autonomy to defend the realm’s borders against foreign hosts, reivers and other bandits, it is long since gone.”

“Their powers have always been somewhat problematic, sire.” George agreed with a nod.

“But this rebellion might prove out to be a blessing in disguise; it might bring end to those powers. If you were to convene the Diet as soon as you return to the capital, the Estates should be more than willing to abolish the Marcher Lords’ rights. The upper estates would probably be somewhat opposed, but with some persuasion the nobility and clergy would acquiesce. The other nobles especially have always been quite disgruntled by the fact that Marcher Lords, who are supposed to be their equals, have had their extra rights. So, if you were to give the chance for the other nobles to strip them of those powers… Well, it shouldn’t be too hard to get them to agree with your Majesty’s view.”

“How do you think the lower estates would react?”

“Burghers and land-owning peasants would do it in a blink of an eye; they are always more than happy to reduce the influence of the lords. Bring them down a peg or two, one might say. Therefore their support is all but guaranteed.”

“You’re right, as always.” Teddy nodded in agreement. “I’ll convene the Diet once we are back at the capital. Though, one question still remains; what should be done with Castle Norris? It’s a sizeable fortress and anyone who holds it, is always going to be in a position of power. To allow it to fall into untrusty hands would be calamitous; it would need to be someone reliable as the lord…”

The King glanced at his adjutant.

“Your Majesty,” George nodded respectfully. “As much as I would be honoured; my family’s seat is in the south, as are most of my other holdings. Castle of this size would require a near constant presence and it would make it impossible for me to continue my service as your adjutant. So, with utmost respect…”

“Just say you don’t want the damn thing.” Teddy huffed amusedly and smiled. “You know, you are a peculiar man, George. Here I am, offering you a castle and you decline the offer. Most people would cut off their left arm for the chance of becoming a lord of a castle of this size.”

“I’m not most people, sire.” George smiled. “Though, the main reason for me passing your Majesty’s most generous offer is the weather.”

“The weather!” Teddy snorted.

“The weather.” George nodded solemnly. “It is, and to put it frankly; it is shite.”

Teddy laughed, but then quickly pulled himself together and glanced at sleeping Billy; he hadn’t woken up.

“That it is.” Teddy shook his head with a bemused smile. “And there’s a horrible draft in that damn heap of stones, I noted. Perhaps the reason why the Norris family has always been so unreliable is the fact that they all wanted to live somewhere sunnier.”

“It very well may be.” George chuckled. “But, concerning the castle,” He continued levelly. “I would suggest turning it into a Crown’s castle with a garrison. And furthermore, an appointment of a vogt with a limit to their term, to manage the civil and military matters, would also be prudent; you could make sure that the castle could not be used as a staging ground for another rebellion.”

“That sounds like a decent idea,” The King hummed. “The town nearby? What was it called… Frestring, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, sire.”

“I could give them borough rights; issue a charter and thus free them from a lord’s rule. I noted that people in the town didn’t seem particularly heartbroken when we entered it and they learned about Norris’ impending downfall. I suspect he wasn’t the most pleasant of lords to live under. It would also invigorate the economy there. Nothing calms people down more than extra pieces of silver in their pockets.”

“Exactly. Moreover, people here did expect, and still probably do, you to enact some kind of retaliatory measures towards those who threw in their lot in support of Lord Norris. But if you were to act in magnanimous manner…”

“They and people in general in the marches would be more inclined to change their views concerning the Crown and me.”

George nodded.

“Then it is settled,” Teddy sighed and stood up, stretching his back with a satisfied grunt. “I’ll have the clerks draft the official documents later, but as of this moment Castle Norris is no more, henceforth it is Frestring’s Crown Castle. See that a contingent of troops is left behind to man the castle when we start our march back to south.”

George hummed in agreement and glanced at the figure sleeping in the King’s bed.

“How is he?”

“He’s…” Teddy didn’t know what to say; Billy wasn’t well, he was hurt and scarred, not only physically but mentally also. And Teddy was worried that the latter form of damage would prove to be more lasting.

“He’s on the road to recovery. Well… just at the start of it.” He finally said.

“Do you wish him to have his own tent?”

“No.” Teddy said. “Not if he doesn’t ask for one.”

George was about to leave, but the King continued speaking.

“He has been... I’ve always known that Norris was a terrible man, cruel and callous, rotten to his black core. Well you’ve seen his and his ilk’s handiwork.” Teddy growled. “But what Billy told me, what he has endured, it was… it was far worse than I could have imagined. To breath the same air with a man like Norris, having to think that that bastard was allowed to walk freely in _my_ court, that _I_ allowed it; it makes me sick. If I would have known what kind of man he was before all of this… And I’m not talking about his little rebellion,” Teddy glanced at Billy. “I would have had him drawn and quartered.”

“Not hanged?” George asked quietly.

“No.” Teddy said, his eyes glinting menacingly. “There would have been the risk that he dies before the good part. I would have liked him to live long enough see his cock and balls cut off and his innards outside his body; for him to have the chance of seeing them cast on hot coals and burned, and for him to smell his own burning flesh.”

“No one has been hanged, drawn and quartered in almost a century; not since the days of your great-grandfather. Not even for high treason, sire.” The King’s aide pointed out quietly.

“I know.” Teddy said coldly. “For him I could have made an exception, still could. Hear him scream…” There were traces of a menacing smile on the King’s lips and he was still for a moment.

“George, if you are in a situation where you can either spare or kill him… Do the latter if you want to be merciful, for if I get my hands on him I won’t be.”

George made a small nod which went unseen by the young King whose eyes were glued to the boy lying in his bed. Also without Teddy’s notice went the expression of subdued shock; George had never seen his sovereign so enraged, filled to the brim with cold and expressionless wrath. Not even when they had been surveying the aftermaths of the sack of Birdenbergh had he looked so enraged. But then George saw his monarch’s eyes, how they looked at the figure on the bed, and he to some extent understood. The King’s adjutant bowed silently and left. When he was out of the tent, George let out a shuddery breath he had been holding in.

 

 

After his counsellor had left, Teddy continued his task of reading through the pile of correspondence and dispatches. Several of them he had to read again because his eyes kept wandering back to Billy. When the official material was finally read through, he grabbed a book from one of his luggage trunks, hauled a chair next to his bed and started absentmindedly flick through the book. Teddy sat in the tent through the morning hours and into the afternoon, not once leaving the side of his bed and the figure in it.

He had promised to be there when Billy would wake up; it wasn’t Teddy’s plan to break that promise.

It was in the afternoon that Billy eventually woke up. Teddy was flipping the pages of another book he had picked up, just mindlessly perusing it through when the boy in his bed started to stir. The King just listened how Billy’s breathing went from deep and even, to a quicker, slightly shallower and how he finally opened his eyes. Billy squinted against the last rays of afternoon sunlight filtrating through the canvas roof.

When he turned his head and noticed Teddy next to his bed, a small, almost shy smile crept on his lips and the blond felt a small flutter in his chest.

“Good morning.” Teddy said and cleared his throat. “Well, it’s actually afternoon, so I suppose it should be ‘good afternoon’.”

“Hello.” Billy said and his smile widened a bit.

“That works as well.” Teddy chuckled.

“It wasn’t a dream then… You said that you’d be here when I wake up.” Billy said, gazing at Teddy.

The King smiled understandingly. “No, you were not dreaming. I said I would be here and kings don’t lie.”

Billy didn’t say anything, just kept looking at the King with something akin to wonderment.

“Are you hungry?” Teddy asked after a while.

Billy’s smile was immediately replaced with an expression of apprehension and almost of shame.

“Yes.” He whispered. “I- I promise _it_ won’t happen again.”

“Billy…” Teddy smiled in a slightly downhearted way. “I’m not angry at you for it, I promise. And if it happens again; I still wouldn’t be cross with you.”

Billy nodded mutely and rose to sit on the edge of the bed, shoulders hunched and shivering slightly when he left the warm cocoon of the blankets.

“Are you cold?” Teddy quickly asked.

“No. No, I’m…” The boy murmured, but a sneeze cut him short.

Teddy had a feeling that Billy was still behaving, or at least trying to behave in a way that he thought would most please the King. It was an awful thought, to think that Billy would try to act in way that he didn’t himself want to, but still would; just because he thought that any kind of individuality would be used against him.

Teddy made a solemn oath to himself that would make his utmost to gently steer Billy away from such form of behaviour.

Standing up, he walked over to the chest that held his clothes and grabbed one of his tunics. He walked over to Billy and wrapped the coat over his narrow shoulders. The garment was far too big for him, but it would keep him warm in the quickly cooling afternoon.

Billy just looked at him for a moment and then pulled the piece of clothing tighter around him.

“Thank you.” Billy said gratefully.

Teddy just nodded and offered his hand to the boy. “Supper?”

“Yes, please.” Billy replied and grabbed Teddy’s outstretched hand.

Teddy pulled him onto his feet and noted how cool Billy’s slim hand was; a thought of repeating the action where he took Billy’s hands between his own crossed Teddy’s mind, but he quickly dispelled the image.

The King walked over to the table and cleared the parchments away, putting them into one of the chests with books and other correspondence. Billy was still hovering near the table, looking a bit apprehensive, but he followed Teddy’s example and sat down with him.

Two of the servants walked in, bowed and quickly set the table for two.

Teddy had told the cooks to prepare something that was hearty but easily digestible. Billy’s stomach just hadn’t handled that well the sheer amount of food he had eaten in the morning, so small steps it was going to be.

Teddy lifted the lid off from the large bowl and a cloud of steam billowed out, the smell of beef stew filled the air.

“Smells good.” Teddy smiled and glanced at Billy.

Billy didn’t reply; his eyes were glued to the steaming bowl of stew. So, Teddy just grabbed Billy’s plate and scooped some of the food on it. It was more like broth than stew he noted, and that was just fine. Maybe Billy could keep it down more easily.

“Thank you.” Billy said as Teddy gave the plate back to him.

As he scooped some of the broth on his own plate, he decided to tease Billy a bit; hopefully he wouldn’t be offended.

“Let’s hope the food isn’t as temperamental as it was in the morning.” Teddy grinned.

To the King’s relieve a blush crept up to Billy’s cheeks. “Let’s.” Billy muttered with a smallest of smiles.

They ate in a pleasant silence and once Billy had finished his plate he just sat there, seeing if his stomach would decide to protest. It didn’t, and he dared to eat some more. The supper was finished with small slices of blackberry tart and when Billy tasted his piece of the sweet dessert he made an absolutely adorable little sigh; someone apparently had a sweet tooth.

“Good?” Teddy asked with a knowing smile.

Billy just nodded eyes full of wonder. As if he couldn’t still quite believe he was eating something so good.

 

 

When the supper was finished and the plates, cups, and such had been collected away by the servants, the lanterns were lit and the gloving braziers brought in. The darkening tent was filled with soft golden light and Billy made a content sigh, closing his eyes.

Teddy silently looked at him for a moment; this was really the first time that Billy looked like he was actually somewhat relaxed. He wasn’t fidgeting or wringing his hands nervously; he looked peaceful and calm.

“Are you feeling better?”

“Yes.” Billy said and opened his eyes. “I haven’t eaten that well in years.”

Teddy clenched his fists under the table. If said by any other person it would have just meant that the food had been wonderful, but when said by Billy it meant literally that; he had not eaten that amount of food in one sitting in years.

“I’m glad to hear.” The King smiled, and then continued levelly. “I was wondering… What would you like to do now?”

Billy’s brow furrowed a bit in confusion. “I… I thought maybe I could go back to the bed and…” his answer petered out and the uncertainty returned to his expression.

“No, I mean, what would you like to do now that you are free?”

Billy’s expression was suddenly full of hesitance and insecurity; he looked lost.

“I don’t know.” He said with a small voice, but then glanced at Teddy with something like doubt.

“If… If I would like to leave…” Billy licked his lips nervously. “Would you let me?” He asked cautiously.

Teddy immediately understood Billy’s doubtful look. He still probably thought, at least to some degree, that he was in a gilded cage. That the King’s words about him being his own man, being free were just comforting lies. There to make him more pliant and conforming.

“I would.” Teddy said. “As I said, you are free to go.”

“I want to leave.” Billy whispered.

Teddy felt a pang in his heart. He didn’t want to see Billy leaving, but he would rather cut of his own hand than be like Norris and keep Billy with him against his will.

“Very well then.” Teddy nodded. “Can you wait until sunrise or do you want to leave now?”

“Now.” Billy said and swallowed hard.

The King stood up and smiled downheartedly down at Billy. “Of course, I’ll have a horse ready for you in an hour. I would also like you to take some provisions and silver with you, get you safely on the road. But I demand one thing when you go.”

“What’s that?” Billy asked with a small shudder.

“That you allow me to send someone to escort you, at least for the night. These regions are not the safest ones to travel through in night-time, and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

Billy nodded mutely.

“I’ll also grant you with a letter of passage; it’ll allow you to travel unimpeded throughout the entire kingdom. It means that you are under the Crown’s and the King’s, under _my_ , personal protection and no one is therefore allowed to stop you, or in any way hinder or prevent your progress. And… I hope you promise me one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“That you stay safe.” The King whispered.

Teddy turned to leave and swallowed thickly, hanging his head low for a moment. He was about to call one of the servants in, to have him prepare a horse and some proper clothes for Billy. But before he could call out, a hand softly grabbed his arm.

Billy had quietly stood up and padded silently around the table to stand behind Teddy.

“I… I don’t really want to go. I just had to know that, that…”

“That I would let you go.” Teddy finished the sentence and turned.

Billy nodded mutely.

The King hesitated for a moment and then brought his hand up, placing it on Billy’s shoulder and squeezing gently.

“I’m glad you decided to stay.”

“I have nowhere else to go.” Billy said quietly and looked down at his feet.

“No family?”

Billy just shook his head.

“Are they dead?” It was a blunt question, but Teddy felt that straightforwardness would be a better solution.

“I don’t know.” Billy whispered with a broken voice. “I never knew them.”

Teddy pushed his luck and gathered the boy in his arms and Billy pressed his forehead against the King’s chest.

“I was brought up by a traveling salesman; Johann was his name. He said that he found me from the side of a road and took me in. I was probably four or five then according to him. He wasn’t particularly kind or gentle, but… but he was dependable. He fed me, clothed me, and taught me how to read and write, also how to do sums. Never hit me…”

Teddy’s hold on Billy tightened a bit and he burrowed himself against the larger man’s chest.

“He was the closest thing of a family I had and it wasn’t a bad way to live; to travel from one town and village to next, see different places and people. But… But then he met Lord Norris, started to do business with him.” Billy whispered with a small tremor. “He ended being in debt to him and then he died, or was killed because of the money he owed or for some other reason. I don’t know. But the- Then they, Lord Norris’ men, said that I was responsible for Johann’s debts. That as his son it was up to me to pay them.”

“You weren’t his son, and even if you were, the law clearly states that children are not responsible for their parents’ debts.” Teddy growled.

“Oh.” Billy made a small humourless huff. “I didn’t know that.”

“Well, anyway.” Billy continued with a small voice. “I became a servant in his household, not willingly, obviously. And the first year was… I wasn’t noticed, I was just one of the faceless servants so it wasn’t so bad, just work and more work; doing what you were told. But then three years ago, after my seventeenth birthday, I was serving Lord Norris’ lunch to him and… And that was the first time he saw me. He took an instant liking to me, and… an-”

Billy snaked his arms around Teddy and he shook from silent tears.

“And then it started.” Teddy whispered brokenly, finishing the short, sad story. “I’m so sorry Billy. So, so sorry.”

Billy just shook and held on tightly.

“Why are you doing this?” Billy asked raspingly. “You’re wealthy and educated, son of an ancient family; you’re the _King_ and… and I’m nothing. I don’t even have a proper name, I’m just William and that’s it. Even the clothes on my back are someone else’s. I can’t give you anything, I’m… I’m worthless, beneath you; you are highborn and I’m... I’m nothing, no one. Why?”

“I want to help you, Billy. That’s all.” Teddy mumbled into the boy’s hair. “I know that you might think that this is a ruse of some kind but it’s not. I’m not expecting anything back from you; I just want to help. And you are wrong, so wrong. You are _not_ worthless or beneath me, or nothing. You are strong, so strong. Many would have just given up under Norris’ torture but you held on.”

“But I didn’t hold on.” Billy sobbed. “He… He broke me. I just let it happen, allowed him to touch me, hurt me, _fuck_ me, and… And I stopped resisting; I gave up and just accepted it. Why didn’t I fight, why, wh-”

“Because…” Teddy tried to find the right words in a situation where there were none. “Because sometimes the only option is to make a… A tactical retreat, to save your strength for another fight.”

It sounded so cold so, so militaristic; people’s lives were not military campaigns, but Teddy didn’t know what else to say.

“I was so tired, I… I had no strength left in me.” Billy wept. “When you found me, I remember that… That I wanted to die. I wasn’t thinking that maybe you would save me or that you would take me with you. I was so, _so_ tired of being hungry and scared and I-” Billy croaked. “I wanted you to kill me. I didn’t want to be hurt anymore. I just wanted it to end. I…”

Teddy shuddered; he had hoped that the desperate look on Billy’s face in the small room hadn’t been because of that. Apparently it had been.

Billy’s legs gave way under him and Teddy pulled him into his lap, keeping him upright.

“Please, please…” Billy mumbled almost incoherently into the crook of Teddy’s neck, sounding far away. “I’ll behave, I won’t… I don’t want to go. I want to be with you, I’ll do anything. I’ll be good, please don’t send me away. I’ll be good... I’ll give you anything you want.”

“Billy. Billy…” Teddy pleaded hoarsely to no avail.

He had slipped into some kind of a trance, and the only thing Teddy could do was to carry Billy to the bed and sit down with him in his lap. Billy clung to him like a drowning man to piece of driftwood, babbling almost incoherently about ‘being good’, ‘giving’, and ‘behaving’. The King was sure of what kind of ‘giving’ Billy was going on about, and tried to coax the shuddering figure in his lap back to his senses. Teddy’s soft murmuring had little effect and it was only so much Teddy could do, or take, and he started to cry.

“Just come back Billy.” Teddy murmured hoarsely. “It’s okay, just come back. You’re safe, you’re safe, you’re…”

In the end it was just tears. Billy crying and clinging to Teddy, while Teddy hugged him back just as tightly, crying as well.

At some point, amidst the weeping, the King felt lithe fingers softly carding through his hair and heard a small, croaky voice murmuring into his ear.

“Don’t cry, Teddy.” Billy was whispering. “Don’t cry. It’s all right, don’t cry.”

Teddy wanted to laugh. Billy, strong and wonderful Billy, was trying to soothe him. It was supposed to be the other way round and he lifted his gaze to look at the boy in his lap.

“Teddy, why are you crying?” Billy asked; his eyes were red and puffy.

“You’re back.” The King smiled wetly.

 “I...” Billy whispered and tried to pull away. “I’m sorry, I…”

Teddy didn’t let him pull away and kept his arms around him, pulling him snugly against him.

“Don’t be.”

They just sat there, the tent slowly cooling around them. Neither let go; hands just clinging to each other’s bodies, seeking comfort and warmth. At some point Teddy realised that Billy had to be starving for touch; for gentle touch to be precise. And more haltingly; Teddy realised that he also longed to be held by someone, anyone.

 

_No. Not just anyone. It had to be Billy._

 

Finally, when the salt of dried tears started to prickle in the corners of his eyes, he loosened his hold on Billy. The boy lifted his gaze and looked at Teddy with reddened eyes.

“Would… Would you come with me to the capital?” Teddy asked hoarsely. “But only if you want.”

The King swallowed hard. “Please.”

It wasn’t a word Teddy often used.

Billy nodded mutely and then spoke. “I don’t have any other place to go. So, if you’ll have m-”

“Always.” Teddy interrupted him. “Always.”

Billy looked at him in wonderment for a moment and then closed his eyes, burying his face into the crook of Teddy’s neck. They sat there for a long time, well into evening. The King breathing in unison with the boy in his lap, his right hand gently rubbing Billy’s back, trying to ease the tension in there.

Teddy felt his own eyes starting to droop and eventually Billy’s grip on him grew more lax and his breathing turned heavier and heavier, sleepier.

Kicking off his boots, the King didn’t even ask permission, he just rolled onto his side with Billy’s arms around him, and pulled a blanket over them. Billy was barely awake and just nuzzled against Teddy’s chest, intertwining his legs with the blond’s. The King buried his face in Billy’s hair, breathing in his scent and slipped his large arms around the man, pulling them tightly together.

They were doing the same thing as in the morning and yesterday, and Teddy found himself wishing that this would not be the last time that he could fall asleep with Billy in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vogt was a title of a reeve, bailiff or advocate, an overlord (mostly of nobility) exerting guardianship or military protection, as well as secular justice over a certain territory.
> 
> Diet is a formal deliberative assembly similar to that of parliament. They were compromised of Estates, usually there were only three; nobility, clergy and burghers. In Sweden (and here in Finland because we were part of the Swedish Kingdom for several centuries) however we also had the peasantry (the land owning sort) represented as the fourth estate. Mainly this was due to the fact that the feudal system never gained a foothold in Sweden and the peasantry was predominantly free. Well, as free as a peasant could be in those days. But still, yay for fledgling beginnings of representative democracy!
> 
> Interestingly, after Sweden lost a war against Russia and Finland became an autonomous Grand Duchy inside the Russian Empire nothing really changed, the Estates simply swore allegiance to the Russian Emperor, now the Grand Duke of Finland, and legislative body still remained in form of a diet, as in Diet of Finland. It existed until 1906 when it came rather apparent, that basing the voting rights of the citizens’ on the medieval idea of a person being a member of a certain estate wasn’t really working. This for the simple reason that majority of people weren’t part of any estate. Thus the diet was reformed from a legislative assembly of four Estates into a unicameral parliament of 200 members. At the same time universal suffrage was introduced, which gave all men and women, 24 years or older, the right to vote and stand for election.  
> New Zealand and parts of Australia gave the right to vote for women before Finland. But Finland actually was the first country in the world to give women the right to vote AND stand for election.
> 
> Well, that was probably unnecessarily long explanation for what a diet is. Anyhow, the next chapter is under work but it might take some time to be finished because I’m going to be awfully busy in February with my studies. But as they say; onwards and upwards!  
> Do leave a comment if you have questions, criticism, suggestions etc.


	4. Chapter 4

///\\\\\

 

Billy was roused from his sleep by the sound of gusts of wind rustling the tent as the ropes that anchored it to the ground were groaning and moaning with the tents jostling. It was still dark but the few lanterns and the still slightly glowing braziers gave just enough light to see around.

When he tried to move Billy noticed the arm around him and the body under him; he was partly lying on top of Teddy. His head was on the large man’s chest, gently going up and down with his even breathing. Billy slowly moved his head and looked at the King’s sleeping form. Even in the dim illumination his hair shone like gold and the soft glow from the lanterns left his features in gentle relief.

Billy gradually slid his hand up his broad chest and softly stroked Teddy’s strong jaw. The wind howled outside, but inside the tent it was quiet enough for Billy to hear the man’s steady exhales. There were beginnings of stubble on the King’s jaw Billy noted as his fingers caught against the roughness. His wandering hand continued its trek up Teddy’s cheek to his temple, stopping as his fingers met the soft, golden strands of hair there.

He really should not have been doing it, touching without permission, but Billy couldn’t help himself. His fingers buried themselves into the short hair on the side of Teddy’s head and his palm pressed against the soft shell of the blond’s ear. Billy closed his eyes for a moment as he drew small circles with his fingers and relished the feeling of contentedness and calm. The easy half-sleep state he was in, the warmth of the man under him and how his soft hair felt against the pads of his fingers, everything just felt good.

Billy wanted to steal another look before he would try to catch sleep again, wanted to remember the soft expression on Teddy’s handsome face, but when he opened his eyes he found blue eyes looking at his own brown ones. His fingers stilled, as did his breathing.

Teddy’s eyes were boring into his, and he could not turn away his gaze; he was pinned down by that inquisitive stare. Finally after what felt like a small eternity Teddy closed his eyes and with his free arm pulled the blankets higher. He then slid both of his large arms around Billy and pulled the man in his hold closer, tucking his head under his jaw. Billy’s nose ended up brushing the base of the King’s throat and both of their legs tangled together.

“Too early.” Teddy mumbled into Billy’s hair with a sleep roughened voice. “Go back to sleep.” And after few deep breaths he was fast asleep.

The wind picked up speed outside and howled wickedly.

Billy was still for a moment and then closed his eyes, Teddy’s arms still held him comfortably.

Everything felt safe.

 

 

Few hours later Billy woke up again, this time to sounds of whinnying horses and to the bustling noises of the camp. He was alone in the bed, but from nearby he heard soft humming. Billy rolled on to his side and saw Teddy sitting by the table, reading a parchment and then scribbling something on it, all the while humming some song. He looked focused on his task and it allowed Billy to watch the man for a moment.

Teddy was unlike anyone he had ever known; he was powerful in every sense of the word, and yet he was calm and kind, and above all he was gentle. No one Billy had ever known had been so gentle and level, so patient, so... caring. He was like those kings from the old tales that people told to each other and to their children; too perfect even to be real. Perhaps that was it, that this wasn’t real. Maybe he had finally cracked; maybe he was lying in his small room drooling like a simpleton while Lord Norris tried to beat some sense back to him. Or perhaps he had finally keeled over from hunger and this was the afterlife.

It didn’t feel like afterlife though. He was feeling a bit hungry and the weather outside seemed to be somewhat unpleasant. Wasn’t the afterlife supposed to be full of good food and sunshine?

Billy’s musings concerning the circumstances of his existence were however cut short when Teddy glanced up from his work and smiled brightly at Billy.

“Morning.” Teddy said and put away his quill.

“Good morning.” Billy replied, and a small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.

“How was your sleep?”

“Sound. I think I’ve never slept that well.” Billy glanced at the King with a small smile. “I think it was the mattress.”

“I’m glad to hear that I’m a passable cushion.” Teddy chuckled. “That’s what we monarchs are there really for,” He said in a mock whisper. “To provide soft bedding for out subjects. Just don’t tell anyone, or I’ll have many more people clamouring to sleep on top of me.”

Billy huffed a small, amused laugh. “I promise I won’t.”

He then yawned and rose to sit on the edge of the bed, noting the change of clothes on a stool nearby. They looked far too small for Teddy.

“They’re for you.” The blond said when he noticed Billy’s staring.

“For me.” Billy whispered with a stunned expression and reached to touch the simple dark-green tunic that was the topmost piece of clothing of the pile. It was made of sturdy and tightly woven fabric, yet it was soft to touch; it had to be high quality wool. The trousers were made from similar kind of cloth, though they were slate grey, but they looked just as well made as the tunic. At the bottom of the pile there was a neatly folded hooded cloak, same colour as the trousers, but it had been treated with some kind of oil to make sure it held water.  On the ground next to the stool there was a pair of boots that looked to be a perfect fit for Billy’s feet. All of the garbs were relatively simple in their decorations but they looked to be worth more than a decent amount of silver.

Billy just looked at the King in surprise.

“I ordered them to be made yesterday. You need some proper clothing once we start our journey back to the capital.” He said and shrugged.

“Thank you.” Billy whispered, feeling slightly choked. He had never had clothes so well made.

“The least I can do.” Teddy murmured and rubbed his neck. “You can’t go around wearing my clothes; they are a bit too large for you.”

It was only then that Billy realised that he was still wearing the King’s oversized tunic, now creased and crumbled from sleeping it on.

“Oh, I’m sorry…” Billy scrambled to take the coat off him.

“No, no.” Teddy chuckled. “I don’t need it; I just thought it would be easier for you to wear something of your own size. I really don’t mind seeing you in my clothe-”

The King’s mouth snapped shut with an audible sound.

“I mean…” Teddy cleared his throat. “Anyway,” He continued nonchalantly. “There’s some hot water for you, if you wish to have a wash. I thought it would nice for you to have a quick scrubbing before putting on your new clothes.”

“I’d like that.” Billy said and stood up. He headed towards the large bowl of steaming hot water on a small side-table.

“Right,” Teddy nodded and headed out. “I’ll give you some privacy and I’ve told the guards not to let anyone in. Feel free to use the razor and anything else you might want.”

The King left and Billy was left alone in the tent.

When he dibbed his finger into the water, a wide smile crept to Billy’s lips; warm water was an exceedingly rare luxury for him. Grabbing a washrag from a pile of clean ones, he dunked it in the water and squeezed the excess water from it. It was almost too hot for his skin when he dragged the sodden cloth against his cheeks, but the warmth felt so good that he didn’t really mind. After a moment of hesitation, he grabbed a bar of sweetly scented soap, produced a small amount of lather and covered his cheeks with it. The small mirror with beautifully carved frames, propped against a jug of cool water, helped with the application of it.

The lather smelled good and Billy almost shivered from delight when the highly decorated razor glided smoothly along his skin. It wasn’t like anything he had experienced before. When in the past he had had the chance to use the common cheap lye soaps they had just made his skin itchy and red, but this felt like shaving with air. He carefully removed the beginnings of the stubble on his cheeks and jaw and finished the shave by dunking his face into the still hot water, hissing from the heat as it was almost too much to bear. But bloody hell if he didn’t feel clean!

He wasn’t really in need of a proper wash; he had probably been bathed while being unconscious. But a quick scrub of his armpits and such wouldn’t be out of order, and as Billy had already shrugged off Teddy’s tunic he proceeded to take off the white undershirt he was still wearing. He pulled the piece of clothing over his head and scrubbed himself clean with the soapy and warm rag. Quickly glancing towards the tents now closed flap door, he hurriedly lowered his trousers and gave a quick wash to his nether regions.

As he dropped the used washrag to a wicker basket next to the table, he made the error of glancing at the mirror and seeing his own naked torso.

 

_Hideous._

 

That’s what Lord Norris had said every time when he had seen Billy’s body, covered in bruises, cuts and scars. He had also said that it didn’t bother him; the marks meant that Billy was _his,_ marked by him.

Like cattle or livestock.

As he traced the scars and bruises on his skin, Billy felt a lump forming in his throat. He was always going to be marked by his former lord. Yes, the bruises would fade and even the smaller scars; some of them were already disappearing. But the cuts and larger scars wouldn’t, they would stay there, always serve as constant reminders of his past.

Billy’s fingers slowly moved from one mark to another. The one near his left clavicle was a result of Norris throwing a knife used to sharpen quills at him. Those three scars on his right arm were there because he had knocked over a table and broken three glass cups; one cut for each one of the broken challises.

Billy reached behind him and felt the patchwork of raised scars on his back; he had never actually seen them. He knew they were there, they always reminded of their existence in some way. Sometimes they were aching and pulling his skin, other times he just scratched some itch and his fingers met one of the raised lines, forcing him to remember that particular welt being made; how it had hurt, how he had cried when Lord Norris had pressed the knife into his skin. From some he only recalled the pain to which he had woken up after having fainted during the actual cutting part. Then there had been the sheer agony of having to lie on his stomach to allow the cuts to scab over, and when they had inevitably split open again from the slightest of movements everything had hurt again; it had always just hurt so much. Pain a constant companion in his life.

His fingers continued to trace the raised marks on his back, but then Billy made an even bigger mistake; he twisted his body in such a manner that he could see the damage on his back. He stilled and just stared. Of course he had always had some idea of the state of his back, but actually seeing the scars left him feeling numb and sick.

 

_Hideous._

 

He hadn’t been wrong, Lord Norris hadn’t been wrong. His back looked awful. It… it looked _hideous_. The way in which the scars crisscrossed on his back and shoulders was nothing but numbing. Billy had always hoped that they weren’t that extensive, that noticeable, that… _disgusting_. But they were, they just… _were_.

Billy felt the tears coming and a sob escaped from his mouth, curling in on himself he cried. Norris had left him spoilt, he was deformed; a monster. Norris would always be there, always. He had marked Billy for himself. Anyone who would see the scars would be sickened and rightly so; Billy himself was disgusted by them. How could anyone touch him let alone his back with anything but revulsion, when he himself barely could stand to do so.

He was spoilt. Damaged goods.

_‘Nothing but a used whore.’_

_That’s what_ he _had said._

 

He sat there for a long time, shuddering with silent tears while the steaming bowl of water slowly turned tepid. Billy had no idea for how long he sat there but the tears finally dried and the only thing that was left was this hollow, swirling mixture of tired grief and ache inside him. There was barely any wherewithal in him to feel anger.

Billy was jostled out of his haze when he sensed a presence behind him; he whipped around and saw Teddy looking at him, at his back. Teddy’s eyes were filled with pity and sorrow and he reached towards Billy.

“Billy… I’m s-”

Billy just withdrew with a shudder and Teddy’s hand stilled. Instead of touching he grabbed the undershirt from where it lay and passed it to Billy and he quickly covered himself with the garment.

“I’m sorry you had to see that. It’s unsightly to look at.” He said through gritted teeth.

“Billy…” Teddy sighed sadly. “It’s not.”

“It is!” Billy hissed with sadness and anger in his voice. “It’s a disgusting and unsightly sight, don’t tell me it isn’t!”

He stood up and pushed past the King, actually bumping into him, and stormed out into the cool autumn morning, passing a pair of surprised looking guards.

The gusty wind felt cold and bracing on his flushed skin, and after a while it dried what little had remained of his tears, and Billy stood there on the small hillock on which the King’s tent stood, watching the hustle and bustle of the camp below.

In distance the castle loomed over the scenery. Even in the golden sunlight the fortress looked off-putting and foreboding. It had been Billy’s prison for over three years and it would still be even if he wouldn’t step in its shadow for the rest of his life. That cursed heap of stones with its bastard lord would always be weighing him down no matter how far he would run. Norris’ deeds had ensured that.

Footfalls headed to his direction, they were steady and even, and Billy already had learned to recognise that gait; it was Teddy. Billy swallowed hard when he realised the way in which he had stormed out; he had actually shoved the King, bumped into him hard and not even apologised. People had been put to the sword for lesser transgressions and no matter what their relationship was; one could not simply harm the royal person for it was a crime of utmost severity.

Billy waited for the inevitable command to turn around, to show some respect. None came however. Teddy simply walked over to him and stood by his side, watching the scenery in front of them.

“It really isn’t unsightly.” Teddy said levelly but with tenderness, referring to Billy’s outburst. “Those scars only become disgusting if you let them define you. Don’t let them control you. Yes, they are a part of you now and always will be, but they are not _you_.”

“But they are hideous.” Billy said brokenly. “Who will ever look at me with something else than distain? Who wou- Would even touch me? Would _you_ be able to touch them?” Billy asked with a hoarse whisper.

“Yes.” The King smiled gently and lifted his arm to hover over Billy’s lower back. “May I?” He asked softly.

Billy nodded mutely and Teddy slowly slid his hand under Billy’s loosely hanging shirt, pressing his large palm and calloused fingers to the skin of Billy’s lower back. His hand felt warm, so warm that Billy thought he would burst into flames from the heat. And when Teddy slid his hand higher, hitching the shirt up and softly tracing the scars with his fingers, Billy made a soft, involuntary whimper.

Teddy’s large hand stopped between Billy’s shoulder blades and he spoke quietly.

“Your scars are… they are like the scars and grooves on an old oak. They show that it has weathered much in its life, maybe a storm has at one point ripped a branch off it, or a passing woodsman has used its trunk as a target for his arrows. Those scars however don’t diminish from that tree’s beauty or from its strength. If anything, they add to it, they show that that tree has survived. And you are like that oak, you are beautiful and strong and your scars don’t in any way make you less, and anyone who denies it is a fool.”

Teddy removed his hand and Billy just stood there stock still for a moment, warmth of the King’s hand lingering on his back until he turned and buried his face into Teddy’s chest. The King just wrapped his arms around him, holding the smaller man firmly, but with infinite gentleness. They stood there for the entire world to see, but the King didn’t seem to mind.

Finally Billy tried to pull back but the King would not allow him to.

“Teddy, people will see us. They will get the wrong idea and talk.” Billy whispered.

“Let them.” He murmured into Billy’s hair.

“But the rumours…”

“I’ll just throw the gossipers into the nearest dungeon for a month. That’ll teach them.”

“You would?”

“Well, I wouldn’t.” Teddy shrugged but then stilled for a moment. “Actually, for you I would.” The King said sternly and his hold tightened around Billy. “For you I would.”

“Why?”  Billy asked weakly.

“Because… Because I can as I’m the King. I promised that no one will ever hurt you, neither with words nor with deeds, and I intend to keep my word. If anyone tries to hurt you I’ll burn them.” Teddy said with a quiet, dangerous voice.

“You shouldn’t do that; I’m not worth the silver to buy the firewood.” Billy whispered, trying to be jovial, but it came out shuddery and unsure.

“I’ll burn them all. The world if I have to.” Teddy growled with a faraway look, it was as if he hadn’t heard Billy’s self-deprecating quip or even his own words. Maybe he had not.

Billy shuddered. He didn’t know how to respond to a statement like that. He had never had friends, Teddy was his first and only one, but even Billy knew that friends usually did not say things like that with such earnestness and conviction.

“Teddy… I… Could we just leave? The castle is there and I… Could we just leave?” He finally uttered.

“I gave the march-order this morning; we will leave at dawn tomorrow.” The King murmured into Billy’s hair. “Can you wait until then?”

Billy nodded and shivered, this time it was because of the cold wind and because his woollen socks were sodden by the mist covered grass he was standing on. Teddy glanced at the wet socks and then glanced at Billy and proceeded to simply pick him up, one hand on his back and another behind the knees, holding him tight and secure against his broad body. He really should have protested the way in which Teddy picked him up, but Billy felt nothing but security in the man’s arms and pressed his face into the crook of his neck.

The sentries knew their place and kept their eyes forward and lips tightly sealed as the King passed them, carrying the strange, dark-haired boy in his lap. And if the King was heard softly murmuring comforting things into the boy’s ear; the guards knew to keep what they had heard to themselves. It wasn’t the most sensible of things to start to spreading rumours of the King’s personal affairs.

 

 

Early in the next morning Billy was standing outside and watching the camp slowly disappearing, tents vanishing one by one, cooking fires being snuffed out with plumes of steam and smoke rising high above them all. The weather was sunny and there was barely any wind, the day was so different when compared to the gusty and damp day that had been yesterday. It was a perfect weather for traveling, neither too hot nor cold, and Billy felt a small surge of excitement coursing through him. He was leaving this place behind him and if it depended on him, he would not be ever again returning under that castle’s shadow. Even in the soft, golden light the stone keep dominated the scenery, the light doing little to dispel the off-putting nature of it.

To get his mind off his prison of almost four years, he ran his fingers on the soft fabric of his new clothes; they and the boots also were a perfect fit. Billy had never worn so comfortable, yet sturdy and well-made apparels. As he was admiring his new clothes, Teddy walked next to him and Billy glanced at the King. He was wearing a dark-blue tunic with a heavy looking cloak clasped around his neck. There was also his knight’s belt with a sword hanging from it. Teddy looked every inch of the King he was; tall, broad shouldered and with a strong angular jaw. He gave off an aura of surety and strength; a feeling of being in command. If one had to use a single word to describe him; regal.

To Billy, and to anyone really, he looked regal.

“Ready to go?”

Billy took a one last look of the castle and turned, hoping to never see Castle Norris again.

“Yes.” He said, voice cracking a bit.

Teddy was still looking at the castle, but after a small moment of contemplation he also turned.

“Let’s go.” He said gently and pulled Billy’s small hand into his large, warm one.

They walked across the spot where the King’s tent had been; the tent itself now packed away to be pitched when they would stop after the first leg of their return journey. The grass on top of which the King’s home during the siege had stood was now flattened and dry after being covered by the thick rugs for so long and as they crossed the dry spot and headed towards two horses, held by a pair of soldiers, a realization hit Billy; he was probably supposed to ride one of the large animals.

Teddy walked over to the larger of the two horses, a bay coloured and absolutely massive stallion with white, feathery socks, and proceeded to softly pet its coat while softly murmuring something unintelligible to it. Billy just stayed back and watched the animals with something akin to fear and awe. His wasn’t exactly afraid of horses per se, he just wasn’t that keen to ride the animals for one simple reason; he didn’t know how to.

“Come and say hello.” Teddy beckoned him closer to his horse. “Max here is a big old softie, aren’t you?” He crooned to the large mount. _Large horse for a large man_ ; Billy thought and took a hesitant step closer.

Teddy yet again grabbed Billy’s hand and placed it to the horse’s smooth, soft flank. “He likes when you stroke it.” Teddy smiled. “Don’t you?” Teddy murmured to the horse and it made a happy whinnying sound and stomped the ground with one of its massive hoofs. “He’s not a proper destrier, but a draught horse. Max has never seen battle; he is just too big and cumbersome for such things. He makes an excellent horse for slow, comfortable riding, though.” Teddy smiled and patted the horse again.

“Come, let’s say hi to Moss.” The King dragged Billy towards the smaller, chestnut coloured gelding. “Moss here is as calm and docile as they come. That’s why we call it just that.” Teddy laughed. “This boy here would, if it were allowed to, just stand still until moss covers it. Not a big fan of trot, let alone bucking and horseplay, are you, you old slowpoke?”

Moss just flicked its tail in a lacklustre manner.

“Lazybones.” Teddy laughed fondly.

Even this fairly normal sized horse seemed absolutely massive to Billy, who had never had that much experience with proper horses. The carriage in which he and Johann had travelled through the land was pulled by a pair of unruly beasts; two infuriatingly stubborn mules. Both were just happy to pull things, but woe to anyone who tried to ride them.

“Teddy I…” Billy muttered quietly. “Maybe I could ride in one of the supply wagons. I wouldn’t mind it and…”

“Nonsense!” Teddy exclaimed excitedly. “We’ll have a grand old time what with talking and eyeing the scenery. We will pass Bannhelm gorge today and you will miss it if you sit in a wagon full of luggage and cooking ware an- Billy?”

“I don’t know how to ride a horse.” Billy muttered ruefully. “Never even been on one’s back.”

It was an awkward thing to admit. To someone like Teddy, for a person who had been with horses all his life, it had to absolutely ridiculous idea that someone wouldn’t know how to ride. Billy hoped that he wouldn’t be too annoyed by his revelation.

“I’m sorry, Billy.” Teddy said levelly. “I didn’t even realise to ask whether or not you can ride. I just expected it and… I’m sorry.”

Billy just looked at the King in disbelief. “There’s nothing for you to apologise, I’m the one slowing the departure. If you just give the word to some supply wagon driver so that I can travel with them…” He muttered.

“I could do that. Or,” Teddy looked at Billy. “You could ride with me.”

“But I don’t kn-”

“With me on Max.” He quickly added.

Billy glanced at the towering animal and then looked at Teddy. “Can it carry the both of us?”

The King snorted amusedly and even the foot soldier holding the horse looked away, trying to hide his smirk.

“I think he can manage.” Teddy smiled and patted the horse again. “You could ride with me at least for today and perhaps for the first few days, that way we could leave the marches behind us relatively quickly. And when we are nearer to the capital I could give you some riding lessons. The march will take at least ten days, perhaps more if we don’t rush or we stay put for a day or two, so we’d have plenty of time for your lessons.”

The idea of leaving the marches as quickly as possible was an appealing one and Billy wasn’t going to oppose the idea. Also, the King’s horse seemed like a decently docile creature so perhaps he wouldn’t immediately fall on his arse, and of course he would have Teddy to hold on to. With his mind’s eye Billy could already see himself clinging to Teddy’s back like some great barnacle or a particularly stubborn bur. And so Billy acquiesced.

“Very well then, just…” Billy bit his lip nervously. “Just don’t let me fall.”

“Never.” Teddy said with sudden seriousness and he took a step closer to Billy. “Ready?”

Billy nodded and then without any further warning Teddy simply picked him up. Big, strong hands gripped him by his thin midriff, thick fingers _almost_ encircling his waist and he was lifted up onto the horse’s back without any kind of difficulty or perceived effort. Of course Billy had known that the King was a strong man, with him carrying Billy around like a sack of flour all the time, but the fact that he was manhandling him onto the towering animal like one might pick up a child; it just sent shivers all over him.

“Swing your leg over and slide yourself right at the front of the saddle.” Teddy ordered, and Billy did as told. He ended up being higher than he had even thought possible and the ground seemed to be somewhere far, far below. Billy’s hands just grasped at the horse’s mane and he hoped that Max would not mind the tight grip.

But before Billy could worry about anything else, Teddy effortlessly placed his leg on the stirrup and hoisted himself up. His right leg swung over the horse’s rump and the large man settled snuggly behind Billy.

 

_Oh._

 

He hadn’t even realised that this was the way they were going to travel; Billy had just assumed that he would be clinging to the King’s back. But instead of that, Teddy’s strong chest was now pressed tightly against his back and his broad frame immediately surrounded Billy with its warmth.

Teddy wiggled himself to a better position and Billy slid back on the saddle, his own thin thighs were inevitably pressed against Teddy’s thick ones. There really was no way for him to fall off the horse, not while those large thighs were there to keep him in place, and when muscular arms went around him to hold the reigns; Billy just melted into the King’s soft hold.

“Sitting comfortably?” Teddy asked with a low murmur, his hot breath tickling Billy’s ear. And rather than hearing the words, Billy felt them; the words just reverberated against his back, so close to Teddy’s broad chest he was pressed against.

“Yes.” Billy managed to utter and he could feel a satisfied hum from the King, who just clicked his tongue. The retinue of knights nearby acting as the vanguard turned their horses and headed towards the road that led away from the castle and towards south, towards the capital city.

The royal standard flapped in the wind and the journey to south had begun.

 

 

Billy didn’t say anything on the first half hour of their journey and neither did Teddy. Both of them seemed content to soak in the silence, and just take in the vistas. Of course other people were talking, the knights in front of them and the foot soldiers behind them forming the rear of the column chatted away. Both groups were laughing and occasionally singing, happy to return to home after a long campaign. The King kept the pace slow, there was no hurry or need to rush the troops and so their march was almost like a languid stroll through a garden.

Teddy’s adjutant came to inform the King of something and he just left the decision in George’s hands. Billy had met this man in his late middle-age yesterday, but he really couldn’t yet say what kind of a man George was; he seemed to share many character traits with the King, but it didn’t mean that he was like him. If Billy had learned one thing in his life, it was that people pretended all the time to be something they were not.

Finally Teddy broke the silence. “Are you well?”

“Yes,” Billy smiled and glanced at the King over his shoulder. “I suppose it takes time to get used to the fact that you are moving forwards while it’s someone else’s muscles doing all the work between your legs.”

“I suppose it is. But don’t worry; you’ll get the hang of this riding business soon enough.”

It still was a peculiar thing; to feel the undulations of Max’s muscles underneath, but it wasn’t the ripples of the horse’s muscles that intrigued Billy. No, it was Teddy’s muscular arms around him and his powerful thighs bracketing his own that kept Billy keenly aware of his surroundings, but being this close to the King also gave him a sense of being safe.

But as much as Billy relished the protected feeling he got from being pressed against the King’s body, it was only Teddy’s scent that he could really concentrate on. The smell was indescribable, a clean and welcoming mixture of the soap he used, saddle oil, and a hint of sweat. It all formed this heady and intoxicating, manly scent; it was the scent of Teddy and Billy found himself breathing in deeper than he was supposed to. So focused was he onto his own inhales that he didn’t hear or notice Teddy pressing his face closer to his dark hair and breathing in as well.

Late in the afternoon it started to rain and the King pulled Billy even closer to himself, wrapping his thick and warm cloak around them both. Billy, partly from pure instinct and partly because he longed to be touched, pressed himself into the unyielding, yet gentle hold of the larger man. The warmth of the body behind him, the scent of the man holding Billy, the soft pitter-patter of the raindrops against his cloak’s hood’s oiled surface, and Max’s slow, even gait, it all formed this comfortable cocoon of contentedness. All of that and the feeling of safety and calm finally doing its trick, Billy’s eyes started to droop. At some point he finally lost his fight against sleep and his head ever so slowly leaned down, chin finally pressed against his own chest.

Instead of waking the man in his arms, the King slid one of his bulky arms higher and pressed his large palm against Billy’s chest, right above his heart, to make sure he wouldn’t fall.

“Sleep.” Teddy murmured, keeping Billy steady against his chest. “We are almost there.”

Billy didn’t hear it, he was already fast asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Teddy is just being a good friend when he promises to burn the world for Billy. I mean, platonic friends do that all the time. Right?
> 
> Anyhow, it has been a month and here is the fourth chapter. It’s a bit of a filler one, but at least the show is getting on the road, so to speak. (Good pun eh?)
> 
> About the next chapter, guess what? I’m going to still be busy, busy, busy, but luckily the fifth chapter is partly written so perhaps it will be out slightly more hastily. Though as always, do take my promises with a pinch of salt.
> 
> If someone is interested, I imagine Max looking something like a Clydesdale draught horse: https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6e/Clydesdale_horse_by_Bonnie_Gruenberg.JPG
> 
> It should be noted however that medieval draught horses were smaller than their modern counterparts, such as Clydesdales which is a 18th century breed. Also, horses in the Middle Ages were rarely differentiated by breed, but rather by use. This led them to be described, for example, as “chargers” and “coursers” (war horses), “palfreys” (riding horses) and as “rounceys” (all-purpose horse). “Destrier” was one of these types. It was considered to be most suited to jousts and it was also seen as the finest and strongest of war horses, though destriers apparently were not enormous draught types.
> 
> This categorizing system however is not set in stone because of the flexibility of the medieval languages, where several words can be used for one thing (or, conversely, several objects are referred to by one word). Words such as 'courser' and 'charger' are used interchangeably (even within one document), and where one document may speak disparagingly of a rouncey, another praises its skill and swiftness.
> 
> As always, do leave a comment if you want to criticise or have ideas or if you simply want to chat.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fifty people have pressed the kudos button and 860 people have viewed this story. Wow!
> 
> Thank you, dear readers!

///\\\\\

 

The journey to the capital took almost two weeks; partly due to the slow pace of their traveling and partly because of the foul weather that kept plaguing them. On two occasions Teddy even made the decision to stay put for a whole day; the weather simply had been too stormy for safe traveling. Everyone spent those wet days and nights in their cool tents, even the food was cold for it was practically impossible to get the cooking fires lit and no matter how hard the cooks tried to get the sodden wood to burn, the wet logs simply refused to catch fire.

It should have been terrible but Billy couldn’t complain because Teddy had apparently made it his personal mission to keep his friend warm. And so Billy spent many long - but comfortable - hours pressed snugly against the blond while he read aloud from one of his books or regaled Billy with a story. Often this resulted in him falling asleep in Teddy’s arms and in the mornings he found himself tucked next to the sleeping King. They had continued sharing the bed after the first day of traveling and after that it had just become almost a naturally occurring thing; Billy would crawl between the blankets and after blowing out most of the candles Teddy would follow suit and wrap himself around Billy to keep him warm.

Billy didn’t mind it one bit because to sleep pressed closely against Teddy’s broad body and to feel his strong arms around him just filled him with a unrivalled sense of security and calm. Sometimes he woke up in the dead of night, feeling the man’s warmth behind, next to, or under him and more often than not he just lied awake for a while, listening his companions soft snoring. Occasionally he even allowed himself to breath in that clean, manly scent that was Teddy. It really was ridiculous; to get comfort from someone’s scent, but Billy just couldn’t find the wherewithal to feel guilty or be weirded by it.

Another thing that had made the traveling through the countryside such a pleasant thing was the fact that he had spent the whole time riding with Teddy on Max’s back. The continuous riding, with the small aches and stiffness that resulted from the endless miles spent doing it should have been tedious and unpleasant but at one point Billy had started to relish the hours he spent on the horse’s back. The changing scenery, the feeling of happiness and the wonderful conversations with the King were a marvellous way to spend the days, hours just whittled away with chatting and shared stories.

Billy had also one day at the halfway mark of their journey comprehended something, he had realised that for the first time in a very long time he was happy. Actually happy, joyously happy, and it hadn’t been just the same kind of weary gratitude he had felt in the first few days after his rescue. He had simply been _happy_ because of something funny Teddy had and Billy had just laughed until his sides hurt, nearly falling off Max. Teddy’s firm hold on him however had prevented him landing face first into mud. It had felt so good to laugh to one’s heart’s content and to feel someone else laughing with you _and_ it had felt even better to feel the King’s arms around him.

One thing Billy was secretly glad of was that Teddy’s and his own efforts to get him acquainted with riding had ended up being half-hearted at best. There had always seemed to be some reason why Billy’s first riding lesson had been pushed until the next day. Some days they had both been too tired from traveling, on others it rained, and so on. Soon however there had not been need for vague excuses because quickly the official matters of state became the most time consuming part of the King’s days and thus his free time grew scarce.

The nearer they got to the capital, more and more villages and towns they came across and more of the King’s time went into receiving delegations of petitioners from these places. Some petitioned for funds to build a new bridge, others for repairs of an old granary etc. Requests varied from small to large but the King received all of them with patience and interest. Usually Billy left the tent to allow Teddy to receive the multitude of mayors, aldermen, councilmen, village elders and such with George in private, but occasionally he was in the tent when they entered and the delegations invariably started their speeches by praising the King for his successful campaign. Teddy always humbly acknowledged the approving tributes but quickly steered the conversation to other matters.

That was one of the things that Billy always found weird, but also very telling of the King’s nature. What little he had gathered from the scant things that Teddy had told to him - for he seemed to avoid talking about the war - and what George had told when Billy had asked; it all spoke of the King’s great courage and fortitude in the war. And yet Teddy downplayed his part, only spoke of the great mettle shown by his knights and ordinary men. So as it was; he rarely - if ever - mentioned his own deeds and actions concerning the war, and if he did so, he never boasted.

 

 

Someone was laughing in front of them and for a moment Billy lifted his gaze, some of the knights were laughing and singing. They had a good reason to feel merry though; everyone’s hearts were set for home as this was their last day on the road. Well, the last morning; they were due to arrive to the capital at some point after midday. But instead of feeling elated Billy felt sorrow bubbling in his chest. For once they reached the city, the extraordinary circumstances of a military campaign would end and there would be an inevitable separation between him and Teddy. Yes, the King had said that he would help him and Billy didn’t doubt it. But in the end he would have to go so as to keep the King’s reputation intact. He would have to leave Teddy because there was no place in the court for a peasant like him.

Well, perhaps he could serve as a stable boy.

But in all seriousness; what would he do for a living? He didn’t have any particular skills, other than his ability to read and write and do sums. But in a city full of merchants, scholars and other educated people that was like declaring that one could breathe; not very noteworthy. Billy had no idea what he would do, none so ever.

This was the main reason why he had remained quiet for the entire morning, only giving short, clipped answers to Teddy’s queries. His near silent behaviour however had not gone unnoticed by the King and abruptly he stopped the horse in the middle of the road, causing the entire column behind them to come to a standstill. The vanguard also stopped after noticing their monarch’s sudden halt and George who rode few paces behind the knights turned his horse and was about to ride to his king, when Teddy with a raise of his hand told him to remain where he was.

This whole thing had gone unnoticed by Billy who was deep in his thoughts and only Teddy’s gentle jostling pulled him back from his considerations.

“Billy, you’ve been awfully quiet this morning. What is it?” He asked.

Billy was silent for a moment.

“I… It’s just that… I’m just sad because this is the end.” He said quietly.

“What do you mean?”

Billy could hear the puzzlement in Teddy’s voice.

“When we reach the capital, we will… we will go our separate ways.”

Billy could feel the man behind his back stilling.

“Is… Is that what you want?” Teddy asked with a strangely suppressed voice.

“Of course not.” Billy’s voice cracked but he continued anyway. “But once we reach the city and you assume your regular duties as the king once more, I… I will have to go. You can’t have someone like me, a peasant, running around your court. So,” Billy whispered brokenly. “I have to go. You have to send me away and I understand that. I really do.”

Teddy didn’t say anything.

“I just want you to know that…” Billy swallowed thickly, trying to will away the tears that threatened to spill over. “That this has been the happiest time of my life and that I owe my life to you. I hope you are happy and that your reign is a long and prosperous one, and…” Rest of his speech petered out.

“Billy,” Teddy said quietly and let go of the reigns, gently grabbing Billy’s hands with his large ones and drawing small circles with his thumbs onto the backs of Billy’s hands.

“Do you really think that I’m going to send you away? That I’m just going to push you away once things return to a more normal state of affairs? What did I say to you on that morning when you first woke up in my tent?”

“That,” Billy whispered brokenly. “That you would help me and that…”

“That you wouldn’t have to be afraid anymore, that I would keep you safe. I promised that I’d be there for you.” Teddy murmured softly into Billy’s neck, his hot breath tickling the sensitive skin there.

“But your ministers and courtiers, every single one of them will think ill of you if you bring someone like me - a lowly peasant - to your court. I- I’m not even that actually.” Billy whispered. “I’m just a vagrant, a- a pauper. I have nothing to my name. Even peasants are above me. The moment your court hears me speak they will know that I’m nothing. They will disapprove an-”

“So what?” Teddy cut Billy off with a growl and that sound sent shivers throughout Billy’s body.

“Ministers can be fired, courtiers told to leave… I am the king and if I want to have you with me then I will have you with me. Anyone who wants to question my decision is more than welcome to do so…”

The way in which the last part was said and how Teddy’s massive arms wound themselves tighter around Billy, it all shook him. The King’s breathing was heavy on Billy’s neck and the strong chest behind him heaved minutely with the deep huffs of air.

“I could become one of your servants, that way…” Billy tried weakly.

“You’re not going to become some servant or a pageboy of mine who scrubs the floors or mucks the stables.”

It was said with such conviction that Billy had no answer to it.

“Do you want to leave?” Teddy asked, not demandingly however.

“No.” Billy said quietly. “I… I want to be with you.”

“Good.” Teddy murmured softly, his heaving chest stilling. “I want that too.”

His arms remained around Billy for a few moments longer until finally he slid one of them away and grabbed the reigns. Teddy’s other arm however remained firmly around Billy, palm of his hand pressed against his heart. With a click of his tongue Teddy told Max to start moving and as the King’s horse moved, so did the rest of the column behind them.

Billy closed his eyes and slowly placed his right hand on Teddy’s, on the one that was pressed against his chest with splayed fingers. He ever so gradually slipped his fingers between Teddy’s and the King gently brought his fingers together, intertwining Billy’s slim ones with his thick ones. Neither man said anything, they just enjoyed of the feeling of closeness and Billy pressed himself against the unyieldingness that was Teddy’s muscular body. He could have sworn that he heard a small content hum from the King.

As they rode on Billy still remained quiet. This time however it was just because of sheer happiness; he could stay with the Teddy.

_I can be with Teddy! I can stay with him!_

 

Again Billy’s silent behaviour didn’t go unnoticed by the King, who yet again tilted his head down.

“You’re still quiet.” He simply stated.

“I’m just so…” Billy smiled shyly, trying to find the right words. “So…”

“I know.” The King murmured and Billy could hear the smile in his words. “I’m reasonably convinced that I feel the same way too.”

Teddy’s hold on him didn’t waiver for good two hours, not until they reached the crest of a small hill and a wonderful sight opened before their eyes; it was Altburg, the capital city of the Kingdom of Löwe.

It was the largest city Billy had ever seen; to him it looked like the whole wide world had packed itself inside the city walls. In his life he had mostly been to provincial villages and hamlets, the few larger towns and the one capital of a province he had seen did not in any way compare to the grandeur of this full-fledged city.

“There it is.” Teddy said with something akin to pride. “City of Kings.”

Billy just stared with open mouth but quickly snapped his gaping mouth shut, hoping that the King had not seen his slack-jawed country yokel stare. The city was - in lack of a better word - beautiful. It was surrounded by a multitude of farms and fields and ringed by a great wall that left in shame all the town walls Billy had previously seen. From one side the stone fortifications followed the contour of a river but mostly the walls ran straight. It was as if someone had drawn straight lines onto the ground with giant ruler and the walls had just been built according to those marks. They looked almost too perfect to be real and yet there they were, standing proud and tall; designed by a master-builder and then brought into existence by the skilful hands of masons. The high, impregnable looking walls were topped with towers placed equidistant of each other, and the large gates - secured by massive gatehouses - gave access to the city from many sides.

One of the walls however ran taller than the rest for it formed the first line of defence for the citadel. And it was only then that Billy realised how absolutely the castle around which the city had grew dominated the landscape. It stood on a large crag; the steep, unclimbable cliffs of the stone protrusion fell vertically on three sides, while one of the sides gently sloped towards the wall surrounding the city, thus giving access to the castle. A set of connecting walls bridged the gap between the wall of the city and the citadel itself and the walls of the castle were just as imposing as the rest of the city’s defensive works. Right at the centre of all of the bulwarks there stood a tall and commanding, behemoth of a building, the main part of the castle rock; the keep. Though it was more than a mere keep, it was a palace made to be easily defended but also built to impress. And in Billy’s opinion it fulfilled the latter demand completely. Even from faraway one could see its banners and pennants fluttering in the breeze, and the way in which its walls glinted meant that many of the windows were glazed, perhaps all of them. And that if anything spoke of immense wealth, for in a building such as the Royal Castle there were a lot of windows to be glazed.

The only building in the city that could in any way offer some competition to the height and size of the castle was the great cathedral that held sway on the other side of the city, situated almost perfectly opposite of the citadel. The cathedral was a man-made rock - instead of a natural one on which the citadel had been built - and served as the city’s second focal point. Altburg was spread between these two landmarks, people’s lives lead in the middle of these bastions of powers both temporal and spiritual.

But it wasn’t the height or the thickness of the city walls or the size and splendour of the castle itself, nor was it the height of the cathedrals towers, or even the general grandeur of the city that made Altburg beautiful in Billy’s mind. No, it was the green belts that broke the city into four even sized parts; wide fields of trees had been planted inside the city walls and Billy had no idea why.

“It’s so big and… and green.” He managed to utter.

“Green?” Teddy chuckled.

“Those trees, why are there trees inside the city.”

“Oh, you mean that way green.” Teddy said and stopped Max and yet again the column behind them stopped. “They’re firebreaks.”

“What are those?” Billy asked with furrowed brow.

“They are there to prevent a fire from spreading, if one of the quarters catches fire,”

“Then those trees prevent the entire city from burning down.” Billy quickly added after realising their use. “That’s really rather ingenious. Is it your idea?” Billy asked and twisted around to look at Teddy who just grinned amusedly.

“Not all clever things in this world flow from the heads of kings’, and as much as I’d like to take the credit… I can’t. They were planted a long time ago during the reign of my grandfather. You see,”

The King pointed at the north-easterly corner of the city.

“During the early years of my grandfather’s reign there was a great fire that started from a smithy near the jewellers’ quarter and the fire spread rapidly. In two days almost the entire city burned down and more or less everything had to be rebuilt. But as it happened, the city-walls were under extensive repairs and reconstruction at that time and the master-mason responsible for the work approached my grandfather with a suggestion. He proposed the planting of the belts of trees, and also suggested the city being built in less crowded manner. So for example the jettying of buildings was forbidden, the streets were widened and the height of structures was limited to five floors, thus making the chance of another great fire less likely. But in the process - quite inadvertently - all of the new regulations made the city…”

“Beautiful.” Billy added.

Teddy just hummed in agreement and with a smile leaned down to speak.  “Let’s go and see it closer.”

With a click of tongue Max yet again started its slow gait, and they headed towards the nearest of city gates. Even if the occasional group of trees made it hard to see everything near the gates clearly, Billy could see that there was a constant flow of people in and out of them.

As they got closer to the city the amount of people on the road increased tenfold. Of course there had always been other people travelling on the road besides the King’s retinue, merchants, travellers and such, but now there was almost a rush and with cheers and waiving hands the people greeted their sovereign and his successful troops. But as one of the tall gatehouses neared and the road turned from packed dirt into actual stone Billy started to feel out of place; he really had no right to be riding with a victorious king into his capital. It would just be weird; people would think it was odd that boy who looked like an underfed servant was riding with their ruler. He should just slip down and walk back to one of the supply wagons, enter the city in them in an inconspicuous manner. No one would take note of another retainer sitting in one of the carriages.

“Teddy, I… Maybe I shouldn’t ride with you, it’s not proper for me t-”

“Billy,” Teddy murmured into Billy’s ear and ever so slightly tightened his arms around him. “I’m the King and I decide what’s proper and what’s not, and what at this moment would be improper is if I were to shove you to the back of the column to travel in some carriage full of luggage.”

“But peop-”

“People can think whatever the hell they want.” Teddy said levelly. And as they rode through the city gates he leaned down and whispered to Billy’s ear. “Welcome to Altburg.”

The streets were lined with cheering people and all of the windows on the buildings lining the street were wide open with citizens leaning out and waving; Billy had never experienced anything like it. The sounds, the smells, the colour and variety of peoples’ clothing, it all felt so new and exciting. And everything and everyone seemed to be pushed together, concentrated into a jubilant mass of people by the tall, well-built half-timbered houses.

Billy had no idea how long the procession through the city took but through it all people cheered and hollered as they praised their king and many of the onlookers threw flowers under Max’s hooves as their king rode past them. People also gave all sorts of little presents to the soldiers and knights, praising them as well. The parade passed two of the three belts of trees and they were wider than Billy had realised when he and Teddy had been looking down upon the city from the edge of the wide and low valley in which Altburg was situated. The wooded stretches separating the different parts of the city were at least quarter of a furlong wide and grass was the only thing growing under the trees.

One of the things Billy noted as the first of the tall citadel walls neared was the orderliness and cleanliness of this vast city; the grass under the trees was actually cut short and not just naturally growing so, the buildings were well maintained and the lack of mud and horseshit on the cobblestoned streets was almost peculiar.

And the smell of the city - or rather the lack thereof - was the most surprising of things, for usually the towns that Billy had visited had reeked of animal and unfortunately of human excrement. But there were no unpleasant smells in Altburg, air just smelled like, well, like air.

“Everything is so clean.” Billy whispered with something akin to awe as they finally reached the first of the large gatehouses that protected the entry to the citadel.

“It’s the sewers. It cost an absolute fortune to build them but they’ve proven to be worth every penny.” Teddy chuckled as the large gates swung open in front of them and they passed under the impenetrable looking arch of the gatehouse.

The short tunnel of the gate opened into the large open space of the terraced slope between the city and the citadel. The street climbed up the hill in few serpentine curves and this time Billy simply could not keep his mouth closed, he just stared around, head turning to and fro.

Even Billy with no military experience what so ever could see that the area between the first wall and the castle proper’s wall was nothing but a killing field. Everywhere one looked, you were surrounded by crenelated walls and imposing towers with multitude of arrow loops covering their surfaces. And before enemy could even reach this point, they’d have to breach the mighty city wall _and_ get through the first wall and its gatehouse under the slope. It would take an absolutely enormous effort to get even to this point and yet you would still have to overcome the walls and gates of the castle itself.

“Norris thought he could take this city.” Billy uttered in disbelief.

“He did, for about a minute or so.” Teddy laughed quietly, almost darkly. “Even if one takes into consideration his successes and all of his scheming and conniving ways; in reality he wasn’t as bright or powerful as he fancied himself to be.”

“Clearly.” Billy huffed, but with a weird feeling of disconnect.

To him Lord Norris had always been so high and mighty, cruel and callous and only answerable to himself; an absolute authority. A ruler not just over Billy but also over everyone in his castle and in his fief; incessantly boasting to everyone how powerful he was and how he would smite down his enemies. But clearly that boasting had been for show or he had been under grave misapprehension of his own strengths; full of hot air. And perhaps that was the reason why he had always been so brutal towards Billy; he had not been able to bend the world to his will, but Billy he had been able to break.

Billy shook his head and took few deep breaths as they rode through the second gate. It really wasn’t the place to start mulling over his miserable lot in life.

 

_Not so miserable anymore. Your friend is the king._

 

Any more dwelling on the past was cut short when the vast bailey in front of the castle opened before Billy’s eyes. It was paved with smooth stone slabs and there were also few trees growing inside the bailey, clearly planted there to make the austere and imposing, almost militaristic space less harsh. The vast courtyard was surrounded by smaller buildings, some of which had partly been built into the walls to protect them from possible projectiles being lobbed over the walls. Not that it was likely that any siege engine could hurtle stones so high as to manage to overcome the sheer combined height of the crag and the walls.

Billy’s head yet again swivelled around as he tried to see everything at once. As he craned his head back to see where they had entered the bailey, he noted that the troops that had steadfastly marched behind them for the past twelve days weren’t there. Apparently they had dispersed to their own barracks after reaching the castle gates. Of course many, if not most of them, had left the King’s army well before the capital for most of the foot soldiers were from the countryside, as were the knights and lords. The latter ones however were expected to return to the capital with their sovereign before they could leave to manage their own holdings and estates.

Teddy steered Max towards a set of steps at the foot which was standing a detachment of well armoured soldiers. From their identical surcoats, which were decorated with the royal coat of arms, Billy knew that they were members of the Royal Guard. The King had told that some of them had stayed behind to ensure the safety of the Steward who was also standing at the foot of the stairs. He was flanked by two heralds in their magnificent tabards and behind them there stood a tall and broad shouldered, serious looking man with a knight’s bearing.

The King stopped Max in front of the group - a guard was already there to take hold of Max’s reigns - and hopped down. Teddy’s boots thumped against the paving stones and it still sent a small shiver of imaginary pain to Billy’s knees whenever he did that. It was only then that Billy realised he would have to come down from the horse’s back in the fashion that had unintentionally become a habit; as in slip down into Teddy’s strong arms. Billy cursed in his mind; he really should have practiced the whole riding thing a whole lot more.

“Coming?” Teddy grinned and Billy tried not to appear too awkward as he slipped into the King’s waiting arms.

 

_In front of his court._

 

As Billy’s feet yet again touched terra firma Teddy turned and headed towards the Steward. Even if the King had not in advance told him that the Steward was his cousin Billy would have guessed it immediately. Anyone would have really. They looked so alike that brothers would have been anyone’s first guess when talking about the two of them. Prince Steven shared practically all of the King’s features; golden blond hair, blue eyes with kindness in them, and a strong angular jaw.

Traits running in the family indeed.

As Teddy got closer the soldiers took attention and raised their pollaxes from slightly dipped position to fully upright stand and the Steward, the heralds, and the serious man, all bowed but it was the Steward who spoke first.

“Your Majesty.” He said levelly.

“Prince Steven.” Teddy said in equally polite manner.

The formality of the situation lasted for another second or so and then Teddy took a long stride forward and embraced the Steward with all of his might. Billy knew perfectly well how those embraces felt and he suppressed a small smile that tried to break through.

‘Bear hug’ was the term that came into mind when the King hugged someone.

When Teddy’s arms wound themselves around the Steward one of the physical traits that Prince Steven didn’t share with his cousin became apparent. It was his height or rather the lack thereof, for the Prince was short and thin. He was like Billy, of similar height and build, and as did Billy he also disappeared into the arms of the King.

“Steve!” Teddy cried happily. “It’s good to see you.”

The Prince’s small hand patted Teddy’s back and he replied in muffled fashion. “It is Teddy, it is. But if you don’t mind, I’d like to breathe.”

The King laughed and ended his crushing embrace.

“So, how have things been here? Reports and letters can tell only so much.”

“Eh.” The Prince shrugged. “Nothing out of the ordinary when it comes to the matters of state. For me though it has been… Reading, reading, and more reading. I never really realised just how much dispatches and reports are being poured over one’s head every single day when one is in charge.”

Prince Steven sighed somewhat wearily and shook his head.

“Teddy, if you ever again request me to act as the steward and I say yes, you should imprison me at once for that will be some mad impostor who is crazy enough to acquiesce to your request. I will adamantly refuse to act as your regent ever again.”

“I could order you, dear cousin.” Teddy smiled amusedly.

“And then I would jump off a tower.” Prince Steven grinned back at him.

“As if you could.” The King snorted.

“How so?” The Prince smiled.

“I think your adjutant might object.” Teddy glanced at the stern looking brunette standing behind the Prince. “He would either tie you to a chair or be at the foot of the tower to catch you.”

“Indeed he would.” The man clad in dark clothing said and again bowed to the King. “Your Majesty.”

“Sir James.” Teddy nodded to the man.

“I suppose he would.” Prince Steven smiled and looked at his aide with a fond smile. “Bucky here really has been invaluable if I’m being completely honest. I think that without his skills in scaring half of the messengers away you would have found my withered body from under a pile of dispatches, hand grasping a quill and desperately reaching towards a yet another document in need of signing.”

“Was it all so bad?”

“Well,” The Prince hummed. “I suppose it was fun when people would bow slightly deeper than usual when I entered the room.”

“You see,” Teddy laughed. “It’s not all so bad.”

Then Prince Steven’s brow furrowed. “Anything new on Norris, I got your letters but was wondering whether anything new had surfaced?”

Teddy sighed glumly and shook his head. “Nothing. Gone into hiding or left the country.”

The Prince hummed thoughtfully and then his blue eyes shifted to Billy who had just stayed next to Max; the horse’s familiar bulk suddenly felt very comforting.

Teddy noticed his cousins staring and with a smile beckoned Billy closer and he walked over to the group and stopped next to the King.

“Your Highness.” Billy said, but as had no idea how he should have greeted the Steward, his bow ended up to be somewhere between a proper bow and a nod.

The Prince replied in a similar fashion, his eyes glinting with curiousness.

“Steve, this is William.” Teddy said and placed his large hand on Billy’s shoulder in a comforting manner. Perhaps he had seen how ill at ease his friend was.

“Billy, Your Highness. Billy is just fine.” Billy mumbled.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Billy.” The Prince smiled and glanced at his cousin with a questioning look.

From the corner of his eye Billy could see that the King only shrugged in a way that said ‘ _I’ll tell you later_ ’.

“Well,” Prince Steven said after the silent exchange. “I’m sure you could do with some rest after your journey.”

“Yes, we could.” Teddy said and stretched, but then looked at Billy. “Or would you like to see the rest of the castle first.”

The King was again asking of his preferences, as if he was some valued guest rather than a no-one, and Billy had no idea what to say. _Again_.

“I… Rest, maybe?” Billy muttered and tried not to fidget too much.

The apparent difference between Teddy and him was becoming more than clear because there were other highborn and cultured people around, not just George to whose presence Billy had almost grown accustomed to. On the road the amount of knights, lords and other important people was limited to a few of Teddy’s commanders and Billy rarely had been around them.

But now? Now they were surrounded by royalty and nobility and other educated people, and Billy’s provincial accent - so different from the beautiful lilt of the King and nobles’ - was a clear indication of his non-existent standing. No one would make the mistake of thinking him as something else than the lowliest of commoners.

Simply put: the nagging feeling of being an outsider, nothing but mere riffraff, was becoming ever clearer. And so the longing to be back on the road with the King where these matters meant less; that yearning was becoming stronger and stronger.

“Rest it is then.” The King said, and with a gentle hand on Billy’s lower back he guided him up the steps towards the large oak doors which were decorated with carvings depicting kings of old. There were curious eyes on them as they neared the doors and Billy could feel it. He tried not to shrink under the onlookers’ scrutiny and willed away the blush that was creeping up his neck.

All feelings of shyness and awkwardness were however forgotten when the massive doors in front of them were pushed open by Teddy, thus revealing the Great Hall of the castle in its full glory. It was a space larger than anything Billy had ever seen; the hall seemed to go on forever and the height of the vast central nave was almost dizzying. Thick cylindrical stone columns - ten on each side of the vast space - were decorated with two alternating linear patterns cut into them; the first piers were embellished with a chevron pattern and the next pair with a lozenge design, columns after that with chevrons again, and so on.

The carved columns supported the next tier of the walls, that being the arcade, and it in turn held up the highest part of the dizzyingly high stone walls of the Great Hall; the clerestory. The high set windows of this topmost level allowed the daylight to pour in and the soft light that fell from high only heightened the feeling that the rib vaulted ceiling soared halfway up to heaven. The cavernous hall was more akin to a cathedral, than to any secular hall Billy had ever seen.

The stained glass windows positioned on both sides of the hall only made the space appear more cathedral like and they illuminated the aisles - the space between the outer walls and the columns - with bright, colourful light as the afternoon sun shone through these windows as well.

The hall was surprisingly sparingly decorated - a far cry from churches Billy had visited - but what objects there were, they all of spoke of great wealth. And even these furnishings were superfluous for the architecture of the Great Hall itself spoke loudly of its master’s power and wealth.

There were tall, wrought iron candleholders standing in every other space between the columns and they looked like they weighed a ton. The candles were not lit because it was day time, but Billy could imagine how the hall would look when it got dark; everything would be bathed in soft, golden light instead of the colourful light of the day.

Besides the vibrantly tinted windows there were also other colourful decorations in the hall. In the spaces between the windows and above the blind arcade that decorated the lover part of the walls, there hung richly coloured tapestries and there were more of those woven pieces of art in this one hall alone than the entire Castle Norris had ever contained. Each of the wall-hangings had depictions of some historical scene or person of importance, and all of them were made with such skill that every last one of them had to cost a king’s ransom.

But what really drew the viewers gaze to itself was the dais at the far end of the hall for it held command over all of the grandeur with its austere simplicity. The only thing on the wide, slightly raised stone platform was the throne made of dark wood, sided only by two lithe columns made of black, polished stone. It was as if all the other furnishings and decorations in the hall gave wide berth to the seat of power out of sheer respect and deference.

Even the high, soaring sandstone wall behind the dais was left without any embellishments; there were neither tapestries nor carvings, nothing to decorate the wall. There were only the smooth, almost shiny surfaces of the black stone columns to highlight the rugged seriousness of the plain stone wall to even greater extent. The whole idea of the arraignment, Billy thought, was to make sure that despite the Great Hall’s splendour and size, despite its effort to look beautiful and impressive with its embellishments, all of it was meaningless. For the only thing that mattered and the only thing anyone should ever be concerned about was the throne, and who ever sat upon it.

Without Billy even realising it, the two of them had walked right up to the dais and his eyes continued to jump from one detail to another, finally settling to look at the throne once more. It was an ancient chair, beautiful in its own austere way, with small scuffs and dents marking its carved surface here and there. It looked like it had seen countless years and countless monarchs come and go; a potent symbol of the Crown and the realm, of the continuity and steadfastness of both.

“King Edmund the Unifier’s throne.” Teddy said and glanced at Billy. “He united the five discordant principalities of old under his banner, and thus created this kingdom. That was his throne; the throne of the first true king of this land, and of every king and queen since. Every ruler from him to Knut to Karl, all of the Gustavs, Helenas and Jameses, and all the Theodores have been crowned on that chair, and have ruled whilst sat on it.”

The King ascended the two steps that led up to the dais and after a moment of simply staring the royal seat, he sat down.

Billy was about to ask something to break the silence but the words died on his lips as the ruler’s eyes landed on him. Billy swallowed hard as he watched the man in front of him; he looked so… so different. It was as if he had grown in size, become more serious, ceased to be _Teddy_ and had transformed into someone else, into something more.

The air in the large hall seemed to disappear and all the sounds in the echoing space died. They were all by themselves in the Great Hall, none of the people outside had yet entered, and there were neither servants nor guards to disturb the stillness of the quiet hall. Again Billy noted the strength of the King’s jaw, the perfectly sculpted mouth, his broad shoulders and most importantly the intense eyes staring back at him. Everything was silent as Teddy’s eyes bored to his; those blue eyes were keeping Billy immobile and he was unable to turn his gaze away.

There was always an aura of confidence and strength surrounding the King but now it was different from anything that Billy had ever experienced, it was different from that mild, gentle surety that he had grown accustomed to.

Now the surety in Teddy’s eyes was unchallengeable and unyielding, brought forth by the Great Hall itself.

A realization hit Billy; on the throne there sat not a man, not his friend, but a _King_.

And then Billy remembered how this man, this king had once told him how he would be referred if using his full title:

His Majesty Theodore the Third, by the Grace of God of Löwe and of His other Possessions and Territories King, High Lord of the North, Defender of the Realm.

A creeping fear spread through him and then a shiver shook Billy as he gazed at the man in front of his eyes. It had always been there, the doubt; that niggling insidious doubt. Lingering just at the edges of his conscious thoughts, that sinister, whispering question; _What if_?

_What if_ this wasn’t true, _what if_ Teddy had been playing a long game? _What if_ he was such a marvellous actor that he had fooled Billy and managed to turn him into a trusting and compliant puppet with his promises of safety and care? Those were things everyone wanted, none more so than Billy especially after his experiences, and perhaps foolishly he had just gobbled up the soft assurances of gentleness and protection.

Teddy could do anything to him and he would be powerless to stop it.

 

_What if?_

 

Maybe the King had just wanted to see how long he could string Billy along. How easy it would be for him to earn his trust, lull him into a false sense of security and now that Billy was in his castle, at his utter and unchallengeable mercy, in the wolf’s lair; it was time for the beast to devour the too trusting lamb.

Billy wanted to turn and run, but he couldn’t. His legs refused to do what he wanted and Teddy’s eyes were there, still there, just staring. And finally the King stood up, walking slowly towards him. His blue eyes never leaving their mark.

 

_Prowling. His prowling towards his prey._

 

Teddy silently walked over to him, his boots making muted thumps as he descended the steps of the dais. He stood wordlessly in front of Billy, towering over him. Slowly he brought his hand up to Billy’s cheek, holding it there for a moment and then sliding it down to side of his neck, leaving it there. Not taking a grip, or sliding it further down, he simply left his large hand resting on Billy’s neck. Even this simple gesture spoke volumes of the man’s strength.

“Are you afraid of me?” Teddy asked quietly.

Billy quaked as a memory flashed behind his eyes.

 

_He was lying on his stomach with Lord Norris straddled on the backs of his thighs, lazily twirling a knife between his fingers and occasionally sliding the sharp tip of the blade against his prey’s cheek. Billy didn’t make a sound, he had to remain quiet for maybe then he wouldn’t be hurt. Norris leaned down and placed almost chaste kisses on the exposed skin of Billy’s shoulders, languidly proceeding towards his neck and then ever so slowly making his way towards his ear. The lord finished his ministrations by nipping the shell of Billy’s ear. He bit too hard and it hurt, but Billy muffled the wince of pain. Puffs of air were breathed hotly against his ear, it was as if Lord Norris was waiting for something, or savouring the moment; just enjoying the sight of Billy under him._

_“Are you afraid of me?” He asked, and Billy could hear the traces of a cruel smile._

_“Yes.” Billy whimpered. He had to answer. He always had to answer._

_“Good.”_

_Billy screamed and cried as the tip of the blade sliced open the skin on his back for the first time._

 

He couldn’t speak, the words died on his lips. Darkness was rushing in and his limbs began to tremble violently, and the urge to be sick washed over him for a brief moment, before his heart seized up in his chest. Billy’s knees gave out on him entirely, sending him tumbling down onto the stone floor.

Teddy was going to hurt him, make him suffer just like Norris had. He was going to be hurt, hurt again, hurt more. Why did it happen to him, why?

 

_Not Teddy. Not him, he is gentle, he…_

_Everyone lies. People always lie._

 

A thousand bees buzzed beneath the surface of Billy’s skin as he sank lower and lower into the pit of blinding terror. He was deaf. He’d gone deaf. Somehow he had always assumed that one’s sense of hearing was the last thing to go. He couldn’t breathe. His heart couldn’t take it. Every inch of his body felt like it was on fire, before a dousing cold washed over him.

 

_I’m dying. I’m…_

 

The fabric of time became a liquid blanket, crashing over Billy like a million poisoned needles and dragging him to hell as he scraped his fingers on the stone floor, trying to get… get away, trying to breathe. He needed air, air, air…

This, this was exactly what it felt like to die. It had to be like this, to watch the world swim away, intangible, fluid and growing darker by the second. Helpless to stop it as one descended away. Then his hearing returned, distorted and painful. Beating heart, his own tears, it all clamoured in his ears as loud as tolling bells, death fought to claim him. What if this was the last time he hurt? What if he died, right then and there, his heart giving out in the middle of… of? Whe- Where was he, where?

Maybe this was how he was meant to go. Maybe faith had finally decided that the broken man that was Billy had spent enough days in this world and came now, years late to finish the job.

Years flew by or perhaps they were only moments. Everything hurt, heartbeats racing, nerves burning hot, brain shutting down, iridescent light and smoky fog swallowing him up. Death always took its time. It was in no rush. It had nowhere else to be and neither did Billy. He just wished the ache would go away sooner.

Dying would be a relief, end to his misery. He could sleep forever. He wouldn’t be hurt anymore.

“Billy.”

It was a flicker, sharp and true. Words cut through the noise in his head. The world was shaking him again. The disembodied words stamped out the needles for a moment, and Billy latched onto them for dear life as they poked pinprick beams of light through the dark.

“I don’t want to… Not alone, not… Please.” He gasped, clinging desperately to those intangible words as he tried to swim back to the surface of his own demise.

He didn’t want to die alone; maybe someone could be with him here at the end.

 

_Please…_

 

Hands landed on his shoulders. They were heavy, but comforting. He’d never felt such comfort in his life. Those words came back, attached to a voice so sweet and so familiar, they dusted away more of that static shrill sound that had consumed him so thoroughly. It was a gentle voice, a kind voice. Billy knew that voice…

“Billy, look at me…  Please, Billy, look at me?” A palm brushed over his cheek.

The buzz cleared. Light crept in. He wasn’t dead, he could breathe. The voice kept calling, kept him afloat. Maybe this time he could follow that voice.

“Billy, look at me. Come back to me, Billy…”

“Te- Teddy…” Billy blinked. His eyes were open. They’d been open the whole time, lashes sticky and salty, his cheeks damp. It took his sluggish mind a small eternity to realize the weird, coloured blobs of light and substance hovering in front of him had taken on the shape of a face; a face with familiar cheekbones and terrified blue eyes.

 

_Teddy._

 

Teddy. Teddy had found him. Teddy had rescued him from the throes of death. But… But why had he saved him? He was supposed to hurt him just like Norris. Why?

“Why aren’t you hurting me?” Billy croaked, his confused mind in need of an answer.

“Wha-” Teddy’s expression was of horror. “What? No, Billy. No, no. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Billy blinked sluggishly, still feeling muddled, barely understanding the words. He finally tore his gaze from Teddy’s face. He realized then, that he was sitting on the floor in a crumbled heap with Teddy’s arms propping him up. He was so confused, his mind listlessly trying to piece together what had just happened to him.

Behind Teddy were standing Prince Steven and Sir James and they both looked worried, frowns of concern on their faces.

Billy didn’t care, he just lacked the wherewithal to care that here he was, grown man sitting on the floor weeping like a child.

But none of that mattered right now. All that mattered was the man kneeling in front of him, protecting him from the world beyond. His sword and cloak had been tossed off to the side as he hovered in front of Billy looking beyond worried, leaving his broad shoulders blocking out the view of the rest of the hall. His palms, having drifted from his shoulders, cupped Billy’s face in their soft curves, holding his head steady as he brushed the tears from his cheeks and tried to coax the trembling man out of this breakdown.

“Teddy...” Billy slurred. His tongue felt thick in his mouth and he licked his lips, trying again. “Why aren’t you hurting me?” He asked a second time.

“Billy… It’s me, Teddy. You’re not in Norris’ castle, you’re in Altburg. You are safe.” Teddy murmured with an upset expression.

“But,” Billy croaked. “ _He_ wanted to know i- if I was afraid of him. That’s what he asked before hurting me. The way you looked at me…”

Then Teddy’s expression changed to even more stricken one as it dawned on him. “You… You thought that I was thinking of hurting you.” He whispered. “The… The way in which you looked at me while I was on the dais it was odd. I thought that you looked afraid and I just wanted to know if… I’m sorry, Billy. I’m so sorry.”

Billy felt ashamed and he lowered his head in mortification. He had thought that Teddy wa- was going to hurt him. His look had been of concern, the query made out of worry, Billy now realised. There had been no malice, no intention of hurting. The setting, the way Teddy had looked on the throne, his own doubts and dreads, feelings of insecurity; it all had just congealed in to this false sense of fear and dread.

Caused him to become hysterical and terrified; scared of his only friend.

He was nothing but a wreck, Billy realised. Why did Teddy bother with him?

“Ted- Teddy I’m-” he stammered. Looking up at his friend, Billy felt his eyes burning again as more tears began to well up at the corners again and he lowered his head. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what happened. I- I’m sorry I embarrassed you. I…”

“No, no, please don’t cry,” Teddy pleaded. He brushed the new tears from his cheeks, leaning in to shield him from sight of the Prince and his aide watching them. “Please don’t feel bad, you didn’t do anything wrong and you most certainly didn’t embarrass me.”

Teddy moved closer and after a moment of hesitance curled himself around Billy as he offered him a moment’s comfort.

Silence fell between them. Billy didn’t take his eyes off of the flagstone floor in front of them, simply leaning into Teddy’s side as he soaked up his affection. Too much… it was all too much. He couldn’t stay here anymore. He just wanted to go somewhere quiet and safe with Teddy, forget that any of this ever happened.

“I want to… to,” Billy murmured wearily. He didn’t move an inch as he slumped into Teddy’s breadth for warmth. “Not here, please.”

“Let’s go somewhere where it’s quiet.” Without hesitation Teddy stood up. He offered Billy a gentle, guiding hand and when he grabbed it and tried to stand up his legs buckled underneath him. The King’s arms were immediately around him, supporting his weight.

“I’m sorry.” Billy whispered ashamedly.

 

_You can’t even walk… You’re useless._

 

“Don’t be,” Teddy murmured and picked him up, one hand on his back and another behind the knees, yet again holding him tight and secure against his broad body.

Billy was far, _far_ beyond caring about how it all looked to Prince Steven and his adjutant and he just wrapped his arms around the King’s neck, burying his face into the crook of his neck. He barely noticed anything when Teddy left the room, lulled to half conscious state by the even, long strides and the King’s soft murmuring.

Billy felt like he was floating as he was cradled in Teddy’s arms; weightless as the King carried him through corridors and doors, heading to a place that was hopefully quiet and peaceful. He felt boneless and tired, barely conscious of the world around him. Everything he could understand and comprehend was the warmth of Teddy’s body and his gentle touch.

Indeterminate time later Billy felt the world tilting over and realised that Teddy had lied down with Billy against his chest like a dead weight. Somehow, in the collapse, Billy had ended up almost entirely on top of Teddy, his head pillowed on a pectoral, and large, strong arms wrapped around his shoulders.

Then, utter silence.

Neither man moved for a long time, just soaking up the other’s warmth as the harrowing afternoon finally dissipated. Now Billy just felt heavy and weak, his limbs still trembling just the slightest bit. He only took comfort from the gentle fingers tracing nonsense patterns up and down his spine through his tunic, and he fought the urge to press a relieved, grateful kiss into the warm, firm chest beneath him.

It was strangely familiar. Lying like this on Teddy’s chest had become the most reassuring thing Billy had ever experienced in his life. Hearing the thump-thump of his heartbeat, listening to his even breathing; it just calmed him down.

He would have thanked Teddy for the comfort he gave, had he not been distracted by another thought altogether. Would have spoken up sooner, if not for the weird phenomenon going on with his throat. His mouth felt raw and sour, but for the life of him Billy couldn’t remember why.

“My mouth tastes weird,” Billy finally said, breaking the silence around them.

He sluggishly lifted his head from Teddy’s chest to look at him. Really look at him, it seemed. He always thought Teddy looked beautiful. Teddy was perfection in every sense of the word, the most handsome, kindest, caring person he had ever met. But now, as he stared up at those concerned blue eyes, and felt those comforting arms around him, Billy realized just how much he needed the man.

Falling asleep with Teddy each night had become a thing he craved and needed, and the pleasure from the King blessing him with his gentleness; it all meant so, _so_ much to him. Each tender smile, each gentle touch slowly, persuasively peeling away the layers of fear and dread Billy had been wrapped to in for so long. The need to be close to Teddy left him vulnerable in a way that both terrified and liberated him, as he was shown with each touch that Teddy would take care of him.

And now as he always did, Teddy watched him with care and soft worry, licking his lips carefully. He reached up, brushing a strand of hair from Billy’s forehead.

“You threw up. I wasn’t going to say anything. I didn’t think you would need another thing to worry about.”

Snapping out of his thoughts, Billy felt embarrassed, but he was just grateful for a logical explanation for the burning in his throat.

Teddy frowned. He brushed his fingers through Billy’s hair for a beat before cupping the back of his head. “Let’s not focus on that. These things happen and you’re not the first one to be sick in the Great Hall so don’t worry yourself with it any longer.”

Exhausted, Billy simply lay his head back down on Teddy’s chest. He relished the feeling of his fingers brushing through his hair, and he allowed his eyes to close, simply focusing on Teddy’s warm touch.

Teddy shifted, adjusting himself against a pillow so that he was propped up more comfortably. Billy didn’t hesitate to adjust himself accordingly, keeping the two of them lined up as he nuzzled into the King’s chest.

The blond hadn’t asked about what had happened, though his eyes were full of question.

Billy bit his lip. He kept his eyes locked on Teddy’s chest, too ashamed to properly admit to him what had really happened. What was he supposed to say; that he’d had a breakdown because he was so damaged that when his friend had looked at him with nothing but keen concern, he had simply been paralyzed with terror. Been convinced that he was about to be hurt by the only person that had ever treated him with nothing but kindness and care.

Even though Teddy wasn’t prying, the questions hung in the air, thick and uncomfortable between them. Billy couldn’t hide it from the King; as much as he felt ashamed of himself and as much as he could weather the worst of someone’s judgement, being under Teddy’s gentle scrutiny was unlike anything he’d ever experienced. It didn’t take him long to crack, and when he did, he pressed his face into the other’s chest, hiding between the valleys of his pectorals with a tired sigh.

Teddy’s fingers kept brushing through his hair, until the King finally spoke. “I’m not going to pry into what happened. I just want you to know that I’m there for you if you want to speak more about it.”

Billy silently, but with gratefulness, nodded into Teddy’s chest and the blond hummed in acknowledgement, continuing his gentle caresses.

Neither spoke for the longest time. Together they simply soaked up each other as the afternoon began its long march into evening. After a good while, Billy’s fit had completely abated, leaving him exhausted and boneless in Teddy’s grip. He didn’t want to move, too content to listen to the King’s heartbeat to even consider moving from that spot. Teddy was so warm and so comforting and Billy felt as he could spend the rest of his days lying just like this and be completely content with his life.

Inevitably he fell asleep, lulled to slumber by Teddy’s heartbeat and the soft ministrations of his fingers.

 

 

Rolling to his back, Billy opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling above him. Colourful patterns had been painted on the spans of the vaulted ceiling, the soft, fluttery light of the candles making them look like they were moving. He turned his head and looked around, noting the room’s comfortable furnishings, everything looked clean and worth a fortune. There was even a large tapestry covering one of the walls, while on the other there was a large window, glass and all.

It was dark outside and Billy had no idea where he was. Yes, he knew it had to be Teddy’s castle and the room where the King had carried him after his fit, but in a citadel size of Altburg Castle it was not a particularly helpful piece of knowledge.

He felt lonely, Billy realised, and for a moment he thought about going and looking for the King but he would just probably get lost while searching and end up falling off the battlements, breaking his neck in the process.

He had spent the last two weeks glued to Teddy, shared the bed with him, been held by him, had been so gently comforted by him and now that the blond wasn’t there to keep him company he felt isolated. It was bound to happen though. They couldn’t keep sharing their body heat to stave off the cold forever. Especially now that Teddy was back in the tiller of the ship of state Billy could not expect the King to have much time for him, for him to be there to help him through his fears and anxieties.

He again glanced out of the window but it was impossible to tell the time, so he just sighed and tried to get back to sleep. As he was about to turn to his side to get to a better position the door of the room opened and a head peeked in.

It was the King.

“Teddy.” Billy said and smiled before he could stop himself.

“Billy.” The blond murmured with pleased expression and stepped into the room. He was wearing a short sleeved, loosely fitting white shirt, a garment more fitting for a labourer than a king. It left his thick arms for the entire world to see and Billy for a moment just stared at those muscled arms. No wonder Teddy was all the time carrying him around like a sack of flour; those arms could probably lift a small horse.

“You’re awake.” The King smiled and walked over to the bed, sitting at the edge of it. “I thought you would sleep for the rest of the night.”

“What time it is.” Billy asked.

“Midnight.” Teddy said. “Or thereabouts.”

“Aren’t you tired?” Billy asked and yawned. “It’s awfully late.”

“Couldn’t sleep.” The blond shrugged. “Just kept tossing and turning so I decided to take a walk. I was probably worried about something…”

Billy blushed slightly. Teddy didn’t need to elaborate, nor did he ask about what had happened in the Great Hall and Billy was grateful for that.

“Would you like to get some fresh air?” The blond asked out of the blue.

Fresh air would not go amiss, Billy thought.

“I… Sure, why not.” He said and pushed the blankets aside.

Teddy pulled him to his feet and headed out of the room, with Billy in tow. They walked down the half-lit corridor, the stones of the floor felt cool under Billy’s feet but the thick woolly socks he was wearing insulated him from the worst of the cold.

The King led them to a sturdy looking door and pushed it open, a rush of cool autumn air pushed past them and they stepped out. Billy found himself looking down at the city from high above; they were standing on one of the castle’s walls, looking through the chest-height crenellations of the battlements. It was a clear night, with stars twinkling high above and the near full-moon meant that one could see surprisingly clear the city and the lands surrounding it. Everything looked peaceful, the Kingdom and its people fast asleep.

“It’s beautiful.” Billy whispered as he gazed the scenery.

“Mhmm.” Teddy hummed but from the corner from his eye Billy saw that the King wasn’t looking at the city.

Billy shivered, but this time it wasn’t because of the cold.

“You are feeling cold.” Teddy said with a worried frown, but before Billy could give an answer the King had taken off his shirt and wrapped it around his slim shoulders.

Billy was left staring at the sight in front of him, barely managing to supress a shiver that most definitely wasn’t a result of the cool night.

Yes, he had always known that Teddy was a strong man with large, exercise honed muscles, but to actually saw his torso without clothes was a different matter completely. Billy’s eyes took in the sight of Teddy’s thick, broad shoulders and the equally massive biceps, before trailing down between his full, hard pectorals and then back up over to a set of small scars near his right clavicle.  Billy blinked once as if he’d imagined the raised lines being made, perhaps they were a result of a battle wound or a training accident. He suddenly felt a tinge of sharp pain pulse in his own back, a sign of solidarity for unsolicited suffering.

He didn’t however flinch or stare at the now-healed skin; those little cuts were nothing when compared to his, if anything they made Teddy even handsomer. Instead, he let his eyes again sweep over the imposing figure of the man in front of him. His eyes took in the sight of the King’s form, his strong jaw, again those thick arms, everything. Eventually Billy’s eyes again ended up staring at his powerful chest and the nipples there, hardened by the cool autumn air. Quickly he moved on.

Noticing the dusting of short blond hair on the man’s chest, Billy allowed his eyes to drift lower as he followed its course down. The hair formed a trail that started from the groove between the large mounds of Teddy’s pectorals and followed its course into the deep grooves that separated the smooth panels of his hard, well-defined abdominal muscles before sliding down the V-shaped plane that pointed towards his pelvis before finally disappearing into his trousers.

Teddy’s body was perfection itself; large, warm and heavily muscled and yet, as Billy very well knew, it was soft to the touch. He had never seen someone so beautiful, and Billy instinctively licked his lips as he remembered all the times he had been lying on top of Teddy, or under him, or being gently held by those strong, unyielding arms. He was so mesmerized by the sight before him that he didn’t even see the way Teddy’s eyes roamed inquisitively, with a hint of fond concern and perhaps with something else, over his own body.

With wobbly legs Billy turned and looked into the distance with his heart racing. The space between his and Teddy’s body wasn’t much and behind him he could feel the closeness of the King, feel the heat emanating from his large frame. The air was surprisingly still and he could smell that heady, clean, and masculine musk of Teddy, that mixture of wool, saddle oil, soap and sweat; the scent of Teddy. A mixture of smells he had without even realising started to associate with safety and happiness.

Billy turned back towards the King and was about to speak, but stopped when he realised how close the blond had stepped. He looked up and found himself face to face with Teddy as the larger man towered over him and he fought the urge to lean in, to press his face against that familiar chest, to breathe in the man he had grown to depend on.

He hadn’t even heard the King moving across the paved floor of the wall at all, and yet here he was, up close with the man, barely inches apart. Billy felt his throat drying up and he swallowed thickly, trying to find his tongue again.

“Uhhm, the stars, they... they are beautiful.” Billy whispered.

Teddy smiled down at him, nodding a little. “Yes, they are. My favourite one is the star near the horizon in the south, Sirius…”

Pressing his hands against the crenellations on either side of Billy’s shoulders, Teddy leaned in a bit more. His eyes looked like they always did as he watched Billy, but there was something under that level gaze now; now Teddy watched him carefully like a hawk. They were so close to each other, he could feel the blond’s body heat ebbing off of him once again like a protective shield, warming him where he stood; they were so close…

Teddy could practically lean in and… well, he was close enough for all sorts of things.

“Would you like to see it?” Teddy asked with a hum.

Billy nodded dumbly and looked down where Teddy’s hands were still framing his shoulders, and he shifted, wondering if he would move his hands enough for him to turn around.

Teddy didn’t move an inch.

“Are you going to move?” Billy asked; his heart was racing so hard he felt like it could burst out of his chest.

Teddy looked down between them. “I think you got enough room to turn around.”

Billy again nodded mutely, looked down between them again, and with a shiver turned.

He did have room to move, at least enough to turn around. Resolving to just go with it, Billy twisted in the cradle of Teddy’s arms until he could feel the phantom brush of Teddy’s chest against his back. But as he placed his hands on the edge of the parapet, the warmth at his back grew, and before he knew it, Billy felt the King wrap his thick arms around his waist, locking them to his hips, and the broad expanse of Teddy’s bare chest line up with his back until the two men were flush from shoulder to hip.

The sound that left Billy was somewhere between a moan and a whimper.

“Billy,” Teddy murmured. He leaned in, letting his lips brush the shell of Billy’s ear for a moment before he spoke again, his voice low and husky. “Do you want me to stop?”

“No.” Billy whispered. “Please don’t go.”

Teddy leaned back a little and as he did so, his other hand glided from where he had it resting on Billy’s stomach and came to rest on his hip, the large hand so perfectly fitting against Billy’s litheness.

“I won’t.” Teddy murmured. “I’m right here.”

They stood there for a good while and Teddy’s hand never strayed away from Billy’s hip, his grip solid but gentle. Protective.

Billy felt the tension in his chest abate, felt his pulse slowing down and he slumped. Relaxing back against the strong chest behind him, Billy allowed himself a moment to just feel. Feel what it was like to be held and comforted, assured and cherished. He liked this. He liked this so much.

As he allowed himself to relish the comfort and adoration ebbing off of Teddy’s warm figure, he felt Teddy’s hand move from his hip down, and behind him. The large hand rested just above the curve of his behind, perhaps waiting for a permission to continue downwards.

The King rested his chin on the Billy’s shoulder to gaze at him. “May I?” He asked quietly.

He should have said no. Feeling almost overwhelmed by the sheer attention Teddy was giving him, Billy could feel a dribble of doubt seeping back into his thoughts, but then a realization hit him with the force of an avalanche.

This was Teddy, gentle and caring Teddy.

The only person in the world who had ever softly held him, gently talked to him, helped him ever so slowly overcome his fears. If he would say stop the large man would do so, Billy was sure of it and therefore he physically could not find it himself to push the other away. He wanted to feel this light, this airy delight of being adored and by someone as beautiful and trustworthy and _good_ as the blond. No, not by someone; it had to be _Teddy_. He wanted the blond to touch him everywhere, wanted to feel those gentle, warm hands all over him.

So he nodded.

The King’s hand slid down causing Billy to inhale sharply. Billy felt Teddy brush his palm across his behind before cupping his left buttock and giving a gentle squeeze. He twisted slightly in Teddy’s grip, pressing himself more firmly into the wall of muscle behind him. Teddy continued gliding his hand along his backside, touching anywhere he liked.

“Teddy…” Billy whispered and moaned as the King’s strong fingers gently dug into the muscles of his arse.

The blond took this as a permission to continue to caress him and treat him like the finest glass. Billy sighed as the feel of Teddy’s hands continued to glide along his body, first along his backside, then on other parts of his torso, touching him where he wanted. For a briefest of moments the calloused fingers slipped under his shirt, brushing themselves against the soft, sensitive skin of Billy’s hips, causing him to make an involuntary small whimper.

He loved the feel of Teddy’s hands on him. There was no grabbing or groping, Teddy simply caressed and massaged his skin and muscles. It was as if the man was trying to chase away all feelings of fear and anxiety out of Billy, and if that was what he was trying to do, he most certainly was making a good job at it.

Finally Teddy’s hands stopped their exploration and ended up yet again encircling his waist. Billy leaned into those arms, resting against the King’s body; just enjoying the feeling of Teddy’s breathing tickling the side of his neck.

“Let’s go inside, it’s getting cold.” Was murmured into Billy’s ear and he nodded mutely in reply.

Teddy removed his arms from around Billy and he turned around to gaze at the blond who was looking at him intently.

 

\- -

 

His heart was ready to leap out from his chest.

Billy was more beautiful than anything or anyone Teddy had seen in his life. The way in which his soft amber-brown eyes shone in the moonlight, how his raven hair was softer than the finest of silks to touch, the warmth of his delicate, pale skin; everything in him was beautiful and Teddy had lost himself. He was spoilt for the rest of his life for no one else but Billy would calm his racing heart.

 

_I love him._

 

It had only been two weeks, two fleeting, short weeks but his heart belonged to the man in front of him. Weeks and months ago, and Teddy would have been quick to dismiss the idea of love. Finding someone who made him feel complete, made him feel whole and not alone, it had been a dream, nothing more. He had already accepted the fact that he would more likely end up into a relationship - and later into a marriage - of convenience than not. It was the way of the royalty.

Yes, his parents had been in love, Teddy knew that. But they had been the exception that made the rule; a reasonably rare occurrence in his family’s history. And the chances that he also would actually meet someone he would love?

That had been a remote one.

And now?

Now there was Billy.

Now Teddy wanted nothing more than to press gentle kisses into his skin, and simply worship him. He wanted to cherish him. Care for him. Wanted to keep him safe.

He remained caught up in his thoughts for so long, it took Billy touching his arm to draw him back to the present. Teddy blinked, focusing in on worried brown eyes for a moment before he licked his lips again.

“Teddy?” Billy whispered.

He reached out, touching the side of Billy’s mouth with his thumb. It was a simple gesture, and yet; it was more intense than anything Teddy had done previously.

The touch drew a gasp out of Billy, and Teddy found his lungs seizing up in shock at the sound. It was more erotic and arousing than anything he’d ever experienced in his life. A simple touch and Billy’s eyes had locked onto his, pupils widening in surprised and confused want as the two of them stared at each other, bereft of words and hovering on the precipice of a whole new level of their relationship.

_Please don’t hate me._

 

Teddy couldn’t hold back anymore. He wanted Billy too much to let him continue to dance just outside the boundaries of his desires for him. He wanted to be with him. He wanted Billy to be more than a friend. He had to worship that beautiful, broken man that was his Billy.

Unable to hold back a moment longer, Teddy wrapped his fingers around Billy’s hand. He laced their fingers together, warm skin against cool skin, and gave his hand a squeeze. Billy was watching him, drawn in by the sudden, tender touches.

“Stop me if yo- If you don’t want this,” Teddy breathed. With that, he gently pulled Billy in his lap, pulling him nearer until they could not get closer. Then, with a shiver of anticipation, Teddy leaned down, his eyes drifting shut.

It was a feather light brush, lips touching in the faintest embrace; so faint in fact, Teddy could barely feel it. But it was the most intense feeling he’d ever felt in his whole life. His lungs seized up, breath escaping in a shaky puff, before he leaned in again. This time, the kiss was a little more insistent, a little more firm as his fingers dug into his companion’s knuckles just barely. Without thinking, Teddy tugged on Billy’s lower lip, his own firm and smooth as he suckled on the flesh between them. It was a brief moment, really, but to Teddy it felt like a lifetime’s worth of affection poured into one, gentle touch.

Billy whimpered into the kiss, slipping their intertwined fingers apart he wrapped his arms around Teddy’s neck and allowed him to gently take and Teddy did just that.

Breathing through his nose, Teddy took hold of Billy’s waist, only to reach up and cup the back of his head, while his other hand slipped down onto Billy’s lower back. He threaded his fingers into the strands of dark hair at the nape of his neck, giving them a faint tug before he carefully placed his palm over the elegant arch of his neck, and held him steady.

Teddy grabbed onto him a little tighter and a little more possessively. He kissed him a little harder, a bit deeper, desperately trying to chase the taste of the man in his arms. His lips parted, Billy following suit without hesitation and his tongue sought out his. Billy made a noise, a moan, into the kiss and Teddy pressed firmly against him, his larger, stronger body pinning the small man against the wall, desperate for more of this man; this beautiful, wonderful man.

Teddy softly took and Billy _oh so_ willingly gave.

“Billy…” He whispered hoarsely after the kiss finally ended. “Billy.”

It was like a prayer.

It _was_ a prayer.

There were tears in Billy’s eyes as he gazed into Teddy’s blue ones. “Te- Teddy.” Billy whispered his name with similar reverence.

“Teddy… I- I love you.”

He clung to Teddy’s neck and buried his face into the crook of his neck, the tears felt hot on the King’s bare skin and he picked Billy up, hands taking a gentle hold of the back of his thighs. Billy wrapped his legs around Teddy’s waist and cried softly, but they weren’t tears of sorrow.

“I love you too, Billy. I love you so much.” Teddy whispered raspingly.

There were hot streaks on his own cheeks, Teddy noted as he headed in with Billy in his lap. He held the man in his lap like he was worth more than all the gold and all the jewels in the land, worth more than everything in the Kingdom put together.

 

_He is. To me he is._

 

Before they lied down onto the King’s bed, Teddy with gentle hands removed the shirt he had given to Billy, carefully pulling off his trousers, leaving him in his underclothing only. He took off his own trousers, crawled onto the soft bed and pulled Billy down with him, tucked him close and then pulled the warm blankets over them both. Billy slid towards the warmth of Teddy’s chest, his thin arm coming around his lower back and he buried his face against the blond’s bare chest. Teddy slipped an arm around his back, tucking him against his body snugly.

As he buried his face into Billy’s dark hair he sighed contently and breathed in the man’s scent. Teddy smiled as he heard similar snuffling from Billy.

He started running a hand over Billy’s skin, slow circles to calm him to sleep. Billy roosted gently against him, and he felt cold feet being tucked between his calves. Teddy pulled him even closer and pressed a silent kiss to Billy’s temple.

“I love you.” The King murmured.

Billy again started to cry softly, his body shuddering with subdued sobs. “Please… again.”

“I love you.” Teddy said once more. “I love you.” He repeated.

He said it again, and again, _and again_ ; continuing the whispered professions of love until Billy’s arm around him grew lax and the gentle crying ceased and was replaced with soft, even huffs of air against his bare chest.

Teddy tucked Billy’s head under his jaw, placed one more kiss amongst his raven hair, and settled in for sleep.

He had never been happier.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If someone was wondering what that episode near the halfway mark of this chapter was; it was Billy having a panic attack.
> 
> Well, this chapter ended up being quite long, longer than it was ever supposed to be. I however had a rare and productive bout of creativity and after the first seven thousand words I just thought ‘sod it’ and decided to crack on. Another six thousand words later and the behemoth of a chapter that is the 5th chapter came into being.
> 
> So there we have it; thirteen thousand words of creating the milieu, some drama, Teddy carrying Billy (again). Oh, that’s right, there was also that part where our boys kiss and confess their love to each other. But I’m sure you were much more interested to read about the general layout and design of Altburg and its castle. Right?
> 
> Right. That’s because good city planning and architecture are sexy topics.
> 
> Also, a wild Steve appears with Bucky in tow!
> 
> If someone wants to know how I imagine the Great Hall looking; it looks a lot like Durham Cathedral’s interior. Here’s a link to Wikimedia Commons page with interior pictures of the cathedral: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Interior_of_Durham_Cathedral
> 
> This picture in particular shows quite well the patterns that decorate the columns: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Interior_of_Durham_Cathedral#/media/File:Durham_Cathedral_(3611606454).jpg
> 
> As always next update is… Well, you know how it is with me.
> 
> PS.  
> I also must give a short notification concerning Under the Northern Sky. It is neither dead nor abandoned; in fact I have a chapter almost finished. I’ve just been (as I have stated far too many times already) busy with life in general and busy with My King, My Love as well.
> 
> But… here is a small peek of the next chapter of Under the Northern Sky:
> 
> “Billy opened his eyes, then squinted and yawned. He had no idea what the time was, but the room was bathed in the bright morning light. Ugh. Closing the curtains seemed like a decent idea but the moment he tried to move he realised that he couldn’t. Billy was in fact mushed between the wall and something that felt like a wall.
> 
> Teddy. 
> 
> The heavy weight of Teddy’s large body was partly on Billy’s and the blond’s strong arms were holding the smaller man firmly in place. Even their legs were entwined in such a manner that Billy doubted if it was even possible to untangle them. Teddy was like some giant octopus trying to keep his prey immobile. As a result Billy was feeling hot, he was thirsty, and he was reasonably convinced that Teddy’s crushing embrace prevented blood flow to his body’s lower half. All in all…
> 
> He loved it. Absolutely loved how Teddy’s arms felt around him.
> 
> Billy had never actually woken next to someone, let alone in someone’s arms, and the fact that the person holding him was Teddy; it filled Billy with unrivalled sense of calm. He felt so safe and content. It was as if Teddy was some great, big barrier between the awful, real world and the blissful land of happiness. Billy felt loved.”
> 
> Do leave a comment if you have questions, criticism, suggestions etc.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, it has been five months and I suppose some of you might have wondered whether this story is abandoned and I can tell you it is not. This chapter was supposed to be published in around May or thereabouts, but I had some catastrophic technical difficulties. As in my computer more or less imploded and I lost my files.
> 
> Normally this would have not been an issue because I have backup files on a separate external hard drive. Unfortunately… The cable connecting my computer and the hard drive had come loose and my computer had not given me any notification of it and this meant that no backup files had been created for over two months. So… I lost a lot of files, including this nearly finished chapter and the newest half-finished chapter of Under the Northern Sky, which in total amounted to a loss of about twenty-two thousand words of text.
> 
> To put it mildly, it was somewhat of a thundering nuisance…
> 
> This loss combined with the stress from my university entry exams just caused me to hit a wall of gigantic proportions. I had my notes of the chapters on paper and I remembered them reasonably well and therefore it should have been easy enough to re-write them. But whenever I tried to write something I was utterly without motivation and will, and I just sort of realised that I needed a break. It took a good long while for me to rediscover the joy of writing but eventually I came up with a new AU and when I suddenly realised that I had written first five thousand words of a new story, it gave me the impetus to rewrite this chapter. This rewritten chapter ended up being a lot longer than the original one, so if it feels overly long I do apologize.
> 
> I am currently writing the next chapter of Under the Northern Sky but I don’t have the foggiest when it will be finished and as my studies have now begun I might be somewhat busy, but… the story, or rather the stories, go on in their slow, steady pace.
> 
> Thank you for your patience and for the kudos, ninety for this story and over hundred for Under the Northern Sky is simply astonishing for me. Again, thank you!

///\\\\\

 

Teddy sat on the edge of his bed and quietly watched the sleeping figure beside him, studying every line of that now familiar face and watched as Billy’s chest slowly moved up and down, breath moving in and out between his lips in gentle puffs. It was still somewhat dark in the King’s bedchamber but the light that poured in through a gap in the drapes gave enough illumination for Teddy to take in Billy’s lithe form, his pale skin, and beautiful dark hair.

The King brushed away a lock of hair from his love’s forehead and allowed his fingers to linger on Billy’s temple for a moment, then moving on to run the tips of his fingers over the curves that his eyes knew so well. Teddy’s touch was light enough that Billy never even shifted in his sleep as his thick fingers moved across his cheek, down the bridge of his straight nose, over the dry lips parted slightly in rest.

Teddy smiled lovingly, withdrawing his hand he stood up, stretching his back with a grunt. He grabbed a loose fitting robe from the back of a nearby chair and put it on, not bothering with its belt he left the robe unfastened and his chest exposed. The royal apartments were always kept warm and comfortable and as the King headed towards his study he added couple of logs in to the embers that still glowed in the large and ornate fireplace.

The King left the door between his bedchamber and study slightly ajar, wanting to hear when Billy would finally wake up, wanting to be there. He was loath to have Billy thinking that there was something more important in the world for Teddy than him.

As Teddy settled behind his large desk he noticed with a sigh how the table was absolutely overflowing with correspondence, dispatches and all manner of official material that needed to be read and signed, thus giving the matters his royal assent.

Steve had the right idea of kingship; privileges were only a small portion of being a king, it was mostly dry and boring governing for the ruler, at least for a ruler who wanted to stay in power.

Teddy leaned back in his chair and sighed again, staring at the ceiling for a moment.

Was being a king sometimes taxing? Yes.

Did he sometimes feel woefully unprepared to rule over an entire kingdom? Yes.

Was it sometimes mind-numbingly tedious to pore over parchment after parchment? Yes.

Was it better to do boring governing than to wage war? Most definitely.

Despite the daunting task of clearing away the parchments, Teddy felt somewhat pleased and content because finally things were back to normal, back to the way they had been before Norris’ insurrection.

Well, nearly back to the way they had been before the rebellion.

Before the war he had been alone; every day woken up alone, gone through the day alone, gone to sleep alone. Day after day he had been surrounded by people and still he had been so bloody alone.

But now? Now there was someone else in his life and that someone was sleeping in his bed just on the other side of the wall.

Teddy still could not quite believe his luck, still could not wrap around his head that someone as beautiful as Billy wanted to stay with him, wanted to be held by him; _loved_ him. Loved Teddy.

The King was staring into the distance with a small, happy smile on his lips, the pictures of last night playing in his head over and over again, when someone walked in after a quick knock on the solid oak door of his study.

Only two people in the castle had the right to do it, to barge in like that; Steve and George being them. The servants and all other members of the King’s court and household always waited for him to give them a permission to enter. So when Steve entered the room Teddy was not the least surprised. It was only the King’s cousin who came to meet him this early because there rarely was something so pressing that George could not wait until it was nearer to noon.

“Steve,” Teddy smiled as his cousin plopped down on a high-backed chair opposite of the King’s desk. “Good morning.”

“Good morning to you too.” Steve said and looked at his younger cousin. “So…”

“So,” Teddy sighed with a small smile. “I suppose you want to hear about the siege and of the past few weeks in general.”

“I do.”

“You have never been one to beat around the bush, have you?” Teddy laughed.

“You know me too well, dear cousin.” Steve grinned.

“Right.” Teddy shook his head with a smirk. “Well… It was a tad over six weeks ago…”

Teddy told about the last open field battle with the Rebel army, told how the King’s army had dealt a crippling blow to Norris’ troops and how it had initiated the beginning of the end for the rebels. The insurrectionists had retreated in a barely orderly fashion through the marches and had finally reached Castle Norris where they had made their last stand, collecting the remainders of their diminished forces there.

The royal army had laid siege as soon as the reinforcing troops had arrived from south and then the squeeze had begun. The decision to let the rebels sweat a bit, to allow them to see their hopeless situation and to stew in the feeling of utter despondency had worked reasonably well, and during the following three weeks many of the defenders had slipped away at night under the cover of darkness. Almost every single one of them had been caught and disarmed and those who were not leaders - them being the ordinary men - had been allowed to leave in peace.

Now, though, Teddy regretted his decision to postpone the assault against the castle because it meant that Billy had suffered two weeks longer than necessary. Of course he had not known of Billy and of the conditions he had had to endure, but still…

As the story progressed Steve started to lean forward, he was more than eager to hear about the battle and the siege, making questions here and there, eyes full of keen interest.

That however changed when Teddy reached the part in his story that concerned Billy and then he started to tell about him, how he had found the boy. And as he quietly told more and more about the way he had been treated, more the look of pity on his cousin’s face turned into anger.

“That vile bastard.” Steve hissed, his small form bristling from subdued anger. “That utter, utter bastard.”

“My thoughts exactly.” Teddy sighed and glanced towards his bedchamber. “But that’s not… I’m not sure if I should tell you this, but… I just have to tell someone.” The King sighed wearily and looked at his cousin.

“Whatever you tell me, Teddy, it will stay between you and I.” Steve said seriously.

Teddy nodded minutely. “Denying food from Billy, mistreating him in general, raping him… That’s not the worst that Norris did to him. He- He liked to use knife on Billy.” The King said quietly.

Steve closed his eyes. “Not… Not down _there_?” He asked shakily.

Teddy shook his head and the Prince’s posture sagged in relief.

“On his back. I suppose even Norris’ depravity had its limits.” Teddy sighed and rubbed his face with both of hands.

“How is he?” Steve asked after a moment of silence. “I mean, I probably can to some extent guess how he is, but…”

“Billy is…” Teddy glanced towards his bedchamber. “He is on the road to recovery, but it is a long road and he needs help and I’m going to give it to him.”

Steve hummed in acknowledgement. “Teddy,” He said in a sterner tone. “Promise me that you are not using him.”

“Wha- I would never do something like that. Never. Surely you know my character well enough to know that.” Teddy huffed.

“I’m not saying that you would do such a thing knowingly, but unintentionally perhaps…” Steve gave him a level gaze and continued before the King could interject. “What you told me… It all speaks of utter reliance on someone. Billy completely depended on Norris and that monster gave him only the barest minimum means for him to survive. And that was only after Billy completely submitted himself to Norris’ will. So… What I’m going after is that, what happens now that he is with you?”

Teddy again tried to speak but his cousin raised his hand and continued.

“I know what kind of a man you are, Teddy. You are a kind and gentle man and I can see that you want to care for Billy, and I know that you will. But Billy probably does not fully know your character, not after two weeks. And even if he knows more about you than I think, knows you well enough to realize that you are a person who cares about people and that you have a need to care for him, he is however still fully aware that his wellbeing and access to even basic needs are tied to your will.”

Steve was quiet for a moment, it was as if he was deliberating his next words carefully.

“But… and this is the important part, what happens if he starts to think that your need and willingness to care for him diminishes? He may feel compelled to do something, maybe he would want to show to you that he is still worthy of your care and attention, worth your while so to speak. Billy would do anything, give anything, to make sure that he’d stay in your good graces, but he only has one thing to give, one thing to offer to you, the thing he had to give to Norris just so he could survive.”

“Himself. He would try offer himself to me.” Teddy said hoarsely, feeling choked.

“Exactly.” The Prince nodded sadly.

Teddy could already see it in his mind’s eye, Billy would submit to Teddy whether he wanted to or not, and the mere thought made his stomach churn with nausea. Simply imagining Billy receiving his affection like a punishment made Teddy feel ill. Just thinking of Billy feeling sick, and frightened at his touch, and still taking it with a forced, submissive smile was more than he could bear. He couldn’t...he’d never do that to him...

“I would never, Steve, never.” Teddy whispered.

“I know, Teddy, I know.” Steve smiled gently. “And that is why it is so good that you are the one who saved him. Many others would be tempted but I know that you are not one of them.

Teddy’s gaze had again drifted back towards his bedchambers door, but after a while he turned back to his cousin.

“I love him.” Teddy said and looked at his cousin. “I love him, Steve.”

“Oh.” The Prince looked somewhat shocked and staggered.

“You seem surprised.” Teddy softly huffed.

“No, it’s just…” Steve smiled. “You have never talked about love or loving someone.”

“No, I have not, but Billy is… I cannot explain it, but he means so much to me.”

“Are you sure that you are not… Well, rushing into things headlong?” Steve asked carefully.

“No, I am not.” Teddy sighed with a small smile. “But whatever heartache I might have in the future is easily worth this feeling I now have.”

Steve hummed in reply. “As I said, I can see that you care for him, or rather love him, but still… Tread carefully and be patient. Don’t force things to happen before they are supposed to, because it is so easy to make the wrong turn at start of a journey. But having said that, I suppose I must congratulate you, dear cousin. Not all of us find happiness while quelling a rebellion.” Steve smiled, but then he continued in a more serious tone. “Teddy, hurt that boy and I swear in our family’s good name that I will knock your regal teeth out.”

“I know you will.” Teddy nodded. “And if I were to hurt him I would not expect anything less from you.”

Steve nodded back with an unyielding expression that morphed into one of satisfaction. “I expect you to introduce us at some point. Billy now has you as a lover, but I think he could do with a friend. Also, someone needs to make him see that you are not so perfect under that perfect exterior of yours.”

Teddy snorted. “Pot calling kettle black. Remind me, Steve, how many times have you started a fight with someone, only to have Barnes finish it for you.”

“A few times.” The Prince shrugged.

“That, Steve,” Teddy laughed. “Is an understatement if I’ve ever heard one.”

“I only punch people who deserve it.” Steve muttered.

The King just rolled his eyes amusedly.

“Oh.” Steve suddenly huffed and reached for his pocket. “I almost forgot why I came here in the first place.” From his pocket he fished out a large ring which he passed to Teddy. “I thought I should give this back.”

Teddy reached for the ring over the table and slipped the gold ring on his right hand’s forefinger, looking quietly at the single, large green stone that had the royal coat of arms engraved on it.

“Did you wear it?” Teddy asked and looked at Steve.

“No,” The prince shook his head. “I could not.”

“Why?” The King frowned. “Stewards have the right to wear the King’s signet ring for a reason, to show that the monarch has given them the authority to rule whilst they are absent. Surely you do not think yourself unfit to rule?”

“I do not.” Steve chuckled. “If it’s not too self-assured for me to say so. What I meant was that I could not wear it because I was physically unable to do so.”

Teddy frowned and was about to speak, but Steve cut him off.

“The damn thing kept slipping off my finger; it is too big for me.” The Prince smiled ruefully.

“Oh.” Teddy nodded. “I see.”

“Not all of us in the family share your ox-like constitution.” Steve laughed.

“Well,” Teddy shrugged. “For what it’s worth, I think you would make an excellent king.”

“Thank you.” Steve said with a small grin.

The Prince was about to continue when a tentative voice called from the King’s bedchamber.

“Teddy?” Billy’s sleepy voice called out and Teddy was already on his feet, heading towards his room.

Steve smiled knowingly and stood up. “I think it is time for me to take my leave.”

The King barely heard his cousin’s words and he was already pushing the door to his bedchamber open.

 

 

Billy was sitting on edge of the large canopy bed, blankets pooling around his hips as he squinted against the light that came through the gaps in the drapes. A shy smile crept on his lips when he noticed the King.

“Teddy.” He said softly.

The only thing the blond could do was to walk over to his love, sit next to him and gently pull the smaller man on his lap. Billy was more than happy to end up pressed snugly against Teddy’s broad body and he slipped his thin arms under the King’s open robe, firmly holding on to Teddy’s muscular form.

“Good morning.” Billy mumbled into Teddy’s bare chest as the blond wrapped his left arm around Billy’s waist while the other big arm remained higher, hand cupping the back of the raven-haired man’s head in a loving manner.

“Good morning.” Teddy murmured back and breathed in Billy’s familiar scent.

They remained quiet for a moment until Billy broke the silence with a tentative question.

“It… It wasn’t a dream when last night you said that…?” There was a definitive edge of uncertainty lacing the query.

“That I love you.” Teddy continued softly. “No, it was not. I love you, Billy. Love you so much.”

Billy just nodded shakily against the King’s chest and tightened his hold around the blond’s body.

“I love you too, Teddy.” Billy said quietly and pressed himself against the King’s chest.

They stayed in that position for a good long while, simply enjoying of the feeling of closeness and comfort that surrounded them, hands slowly gliding over each other’s bodies. At some point amidst the slow caresses Billy’s shirt became loose at the neck and slid to one side, exposing a pale expanse of shoulder and Teddy’s blood began to stir. He slid one of his hand’s lower, firmly grabbing one of Billy’s arse cheeks in it, gently squeezing. Billy moaned softly and his sigh of pleasure enthused something in the King and made him bold. He parted his lips and ran his tongue down Billy’s neck, drawing forth a gasp and a clutching of hands.

Teddy wanted so much more, he wanted to lean Billy down, pin him against the mattress and remove the shirt that was in the way so that he could run his hands across Billy’s lithe body. He wanted clamp his mouth firmly against Billy’s neck and to mark him his so that he could move lower, lick and bite his way to the pink, little nipples that he had seen glimpses of whenever Billy had changed clothes around him. God, he wanted to tease and lick them, make Billy squirm from delight, only to gently take one of the pieces of sensitive flesh between his teeth and draw out moans from him. Would Billy’s squirming transform into thrashing, would Teddy have to keep him in place so that he could not break free from his ministrations.

Teddy was almost going to steer Billy on his back, to proceed with his wanton desires, when his own words clamoured in his ears.

_I would never use him._

 

Teddy’s mouth that was still laving attention to Billy’s neck and the hand that was possessively planted on Billy’s arse both stilled. He had barely half an hour ago promised to Steve and to himself that he would not use Billy, would not rush things and now he had almost done that, almost used Billy to satisfy his own needs and desires. And even though the man in Teddy’s lap  looked and sounded more than willing to receive attention from the him, Teddy knew that things could go the wrong way very quickly.

Their burgeoning relationship was barely a sapling, and so young and underdeveloped that things done wrong at the beginning would make sure that the relationship would mature into something gnarled and twisted and wrong. And so Teddy ever so slowly ceased his caresses and kissing, making absolutely sure that Billy would not think that he was ending his ministrations because Billy had done something erroneous.

They again settled into silence and it was only after Teddy’s stomach made a rumbly sound that the silence was broken.

“Breakfast?” Teddy murmured into Billy’s hair, his voice affected by the heady moment of passion.

“Yes, please.” Billy mumbled back, his hands withdrawing from around the King’s torso.

Billy slid off from the blond’s lap and he settled next to Teddy, but as the King was about to stand up Billy spoke with a hesitant voice.

“Teddy, I…” Billy murmured. “Would it perhaps be for the best if I were not in your bed when the servants answer?”

Teddy softly took Billy’s head between his hands, gazing lovingly at him. “They will figure out soon enough what we are to each other. If we appear ill at ease, they will be so as well. And this is our bed now, if you wish it.”

“They will think me your whore. The moment they hear me speak, they will think me your whore.” Billy whispered, brokenly and lowered his eyes.

It was only then that Teddy realised something, whenever Billy and he had been with other people, even with George, Billy had withdrawn from him. He had always left space between himself and the ruler, as if to make sure that no one could get the wrong idea, could not think that there was something more than just friendship between the two men.

Teddy gently tilted Billy’s chin up to find his face had grown distressed. He had not given a thought to Billy's behaviour, let alone his accent. The latter had always simply been a part of him, just like his interest in reading and his soft, gentle smile. Now that it was mentioned, though, Teddy found he could not simply deny it.

“It will not be for long before I set them right. I give you my word.” Teddy softly spoke and leaned down to place a kiss on the soft lips he so adored.

“They will make fun of you.” Billy still tried. “The King having an affair with… with a pauper. They will ridicule you.”

“Let them.” Teddy murmured against Billy’s lips. “If they want to use me as the butt of their jokes, to spin rumours of my personal life, then fine, I could live with it. I could live with it because I would not care. Why would I? I am happy with you, Billy. And if the rumours would be about the King being madly in love with a pauper then that would be just fine because that would actually be true. However, if those rumours are pointed towards you… Then I won’t be so forgiving.” Teddy continued, his voice growing more serious.

“Teddy…” Billy whispered, his brown eyes full of emotion.

“When I said that no one would hurt you ever again I meant it. Anyone who thinks of hurting you, with words or with deeds, will regret it.” Teddy said quietly, his voice having gone to a dangerous timbre. “My god they are going to regret it.”

Billy shivered in the King’s arms and Teddy realised that perhaps he should try to reign in his avowals of protection. To continuously declare his willingness to avenge even the tiniest of slights acted towards Billy was perhaps unnecessary, and he had started to feel that something less than promising to gut anyone and everyone who even glanced the wrong way at Billy would be enough to make him happy.

And that was the only thing Teddy wanted to do, it was to make Billy happy.

It wasn't that he'd ever wished for Billy to be unhappy. But this was the first time he had felt so strongly that he wanted someone - Billy, to be precise - to be happy no matter whether it also made Teddy happy in the process or not.

This went beyond the helpless urge he'd always felt to take care of Billy in the previous weeks, making sure the boy ate and slept and was kept warm. This was… well, perhaps it was whatever had inspired his own mother to spoil him so much as a child. He understood now the urge to shower someone in treats and coddle them and watch the wonder form in their eyes when you opened them to the joys that life could hold. Perhaps this was true love.

Teddy’s ponderings was cut short by a growl of his stomach and he realised that he could just about eat a horse, or at least a decently sized pony.

Teddy straightened and headed for the door, calling in the servants to bring them breakfast. He walked back to the bed, sat down and wrapped himself around Billy in such a manner that no one could interpret their relationship to be anything else than romantic.

When the door opened, Teddy merely raised his head to watch the servants enter the room. They bore a large tray between them, and after wishing him good morning they carried it to the table in front of the wide window and set it down. One proceeded to set the plates and cups while the other went along the wall, pulling back the heavy velvet draperies, bathing the room in bright morning sun. Teddy watched them without moving away from Billy.

After having done what they were supposed to the servants turned expectantly to the King.

“You may go.” Teddy gave them a small nod.

“Sire.” Both acknowledged their King and bowed, leaving the room promptly.

Teddy often found himself feeling grateful for the fact that most of his household’s servants had served his family for years; most had been serving his mother and some even his grandfather and now they were in his service. This continuity was, in a way, reassuring and comforting because it meant that the risk of spies and other possible interlopers slithering into his court was slim. Of course no system was completely watertight, but when most of the people who ran the day-to-day affairs of the royal household were people whom Teddy had known since he had been a boy and who had been absolutely devoted to his mother, it gave some semblance of surety for Teddy that it wasn’t going to be one of the servants who would stick a knife between his ribs, not when some of them had given him piggybag rides on their backs when he had been little.

Teddy’s stomach growled again, causing Billy to make a small laugh and to pat the King’s belly gently.

“Should I be worried that you will eat all the food?” Billy smiled.

“No. But I might just eat you up.” Teddy uttered before he could stop himself.

Billy’s eyes widened and his expression was unreadable

“I mean…” Teddy said roughly, clearing his throat. “Sorry.”

“No… It’s fine.” Billy muttered as a slight blush crept up his cheeks and then he stood up, holding out his hand which Teddy gladly grasped.

They walked over to the table and settled down next to one another. Billy always sat right next to the King whenever they were by themselves and Teddy had found that it made him very content to have the raven-haired man so close that their elbows were constantly brushing together. It probably gave Billy a similar sense of comfort and Teddy was more than happy to provide him with all the closeness he craved.

They ate in a comfortable silence, not because they were without things to say, but rather because Billy was always so focused on his eating. He invariably ate his meal with a sort of expectation that someone was going to take his food away mid-meal and considering his history Teddy understood that kind of expectation completely. Teddy was more than happy to see Billy polishing off whatever was on his plate with gusto, and in the past couple of weeks the boy had put on some weight, just enough that his slenderness was slightly less worrying. Not that Billy’s appearance could still be described with any other word than thin. Teddy suspected that Billy would remain somewhat slight for the rest of his life because of the neglect he had endured must have had at least some adverse effects on his health, perhaps even slightly held back his growth. Teddy didn’t however mind Billy’s appearance; to him he was always the most beautiful person he had ever met.

 

\- -

 

Billy watched as Teddy finished dressing. The clothes he donned were similar to the ones he had worn while they had been on the road, though, now his clothes were slightly more decorated and even more formfitting than previously. The latter feature especially was one that Billy very much approved; he simply could not keep his eyes away from the King’s muscular form, stealing appreciative glances as he donned his own clothes.

He was however surprised by the fact the clothes Teddy wore were still, in essence, simple. Billy had seen his fair share of noblemen clad in their finery and they had invariably always worn tightfitting hoses, a doublet, and a finely decorated tunic or cotehardie on top of that. And always they had worn those ridiculous long-tipped shoes that were utterly impractical for anything else than showing-off one’s wealth and status.

Teddy’s outfit was however characterised by its practical nature, the tunic which - despite its form fittingness and high-quality materials - was so simple in cut that any well-to-do young nobleman or even a burgher, rather than royal, could wear it. His trousers were proper trousers, completely and utterly utilitarian, not that Billy would have minded seeing Teddy’s muscular thighs and large calves clad in a pair of tight fitting hoses. The boots he wore were the same ones he had worn the entire time Billy had known the King, simple and practical, and clearly in some way important to Teddy. The only part of his outfit that clearly indicated his rank and status was his ornate belt, hanging low on his hips and with the tell-tale loose knot of a knight in it.

“Ready to see the castle?” Teddy asked and slipped his arms around Billy, looking down at him.

“Lead on.” Billy smiled and Teddy withdrew his arms with a quick kiss, heading to the door with Billy in tow.

Just as the King was about to push the door open Billy stopped, gently grabbing Teddy’s arm.

“I…” Billy said, contemplating his words for a moment. “I know that you said that I could call you Teddy around other people, but I was just wondering that maybe I should call you ‘sire’ or ‘Your Majesty’ now that we are here in court, mayb-”

“No.” Teddy cut him off gently. “I said that you could call me Teddy and I intend to keep my word. In fact, I wish that you call me Teddy. I have so few people in my life who actually call me by my name; Steve really is the only one. So I would very much like if you would use my actual name around other people and not the official form of addressing.”

“Are you sure?”

“Very much so.” Teddy said and softly brought his large hands to cradle Billy’s head. “It’ll show people what you mean to me, make them understand that you are mine, my Billy. Tha-”

Teddy suddenly stopped, his expression going from soft to a worried one. “I’m sorry.” The King whispered. “I didn’t mean it like _that_ , you are your own man and I just… I’m sor-” Teddy tried to say again but Billy shut him up with a small kiss.

“I know what you meant.” Billy said softly and wrapped his arms around Teddy’s massive shoulders, looking at his chest. “But if I’m yours, then, maybe…” Billy bit his lip and raised his gaze. “Maybe you could be my Teddy.”

“Yes.” Teddy uttered. “Of course I’ll be yours. Your Teddy.” The King smiled warmly and brought their foreheads together. “My Billy.” Teddy said with a soft, happy voice.

“My Teddy.” Billy sighed back with equal kind of bliss and burrowed himself firmly against Teddy’s broad body.

After a yet another long embrace they finally left the King’s apartments and started the tour.

Teddy showed Billy to different rooms of the castle in many different floors, and the rooms varied from small to large. Occasionally they passed some doors and rooms completely, the King explaining them to be for storage and so forth. Teddy told him that he could get acquainted to the sprawling castle also by himself, that there was so much to be seen that they really could not see everything in one go.

The size of the castle was still a thing that Billy found somewhat awe-inspiring, though what also made him constantly swivel his head to and fro were the decorations of the castle. Where most of the walls of Castle Norris had been merely treated with lime wash, the only richly decorated spaces having been the Great Hall and Lord Norris’ chambers, here in the Altburg Castle it was quite different. Each and every wall was decorated, bright hues of greens and reds with yellows and blues here and there to give even more colour to the walls. Painted arches and intricately carved capitals of columns and oak doors were everywhere. Every single surface of the castle spoke of such wealth that Billy could hardly fathom it.

And then there were the windows. Large glazed openings in the walls to allow the sunlight to brighten the already bright colours of the walls and the ceilings to an even greater extent. The windows of Castle Norris had mostly been arrow loops which had been later fitted with glass to keep up with the latest fashion and therefore not really proper windows, but here in the Altburg Castle you could actually see outside and enjoy of the light.

Teddy lead them through the long stretches of corridors and whenever they passed servants they would bow to the King and Teddy would in turn reply to the expression of respect with a small nod and a smile and that simple gesture alone welled Billy’s heart with awe and happiness. Because Billy had never seen any other person in power behaving in such a manner, at best there had been indifferent nods and waves of hands; at worst - as Billy very well himself knew - the people in power had been violent. Perhaps it was Teddy’s authority and might that made him gentle and kind, he was so high above the rest that he didn’t need to prop his status up with needless haughtiness or cruelty. He didn’t had to be afraid to show his gentle side for the fear of people thinking him too soft and kind because anyone who saw the King knew that he could break them with ease, whether on a field of battle, politically in court, or with his own bare hands.

They finally reached the door that lead to the Great Hall and as they entered the vast space Billy was yet again awestruck by the sheer size of the cavernous hall. Teddy lead them towards the dais and Billy’s eyes slid over to the spot on the floor where he had crumbled yesterday, half expecting his vomit to still be there. Of course it wasn’t, probably having been cleaned away the moment the King had left the Hall with Billy in his lap.

Still, Billy’s eyes lingered on the spot and Teddy noticed his staring, he didn’t however say anything, but he gently took hold of Billy’s hand and lead them under a large tapestry that was in the perfect position to been seen by someone sitting on the throne.

The heavy looking and ornate piece of artwork depicted two people, a man and a woman, standing side by side in green robes with golden decorations and both were wearing crowns. The man’s hands rested on the hilt of a sword that stood on its point in front of him. The woman in the tapestry held in her right hand a sceptre and in her left hand she held a golden orb.

Billy didn’t have to ask who the people in the picture were. It was clear to anyone who saw it that it was Teddy’s parents depicted in the drapery. Both had the golden blond hair of their son and the same blue eyes.

“My parents.” Teddy finally spoke with a small, melancholic smile.

“She was beautiful.” Billy said and looked at the image of the resplendent queen.

“She was.” Teddy said and turned to Billy, grasping his both hands into his large and warm ones. “I wish you could have met her, she would have liked you.”

“When did they…”

“My father died when I was little, so I don’t have many memories of him.”

“I’m sorry.” Billy said quietly and looked up at the woven image of the King’s mother.

Teddy being a king meant that his mother was dead and Billy really should have known when she had died, a queen dying and the crown passing on to a new sovereign was not a small thing, but Billy just could not remember when it had happened.

“Six years ago.” Teddy said after a while and glanced at the tapestry. “That’s when my mother died, it sometimes feels like it happened a lifetime ago, and sometimes like it was only a week ago. To be twenty and to have the responsibilities of a king thrust upon you… It is not a thing I wish for anyone.”

“You’re twenty six.” Billy uttered before he could stop himself. “Your so…”

Teddy looked back at him and smiled. “Ancient?” He quirked up an eyebrow and laughed.

“No, it’s just that you look a bit younger.” Billy said, blushing.

“You mean that I am well preserved.” Teddy teased.

“Stop it.” Billy muttered and blushed even more, to which Teddy just replied with an airy laugh.

“The age difference… does it bother you?” Teddy asked, his voice more serious.

“No, of course not.” Billy shook his head. “Six years separating us is not that much and, well, it could be seven or five. I don’t really know how old I am so let’s just agree that I’m twenty and leave it at that.”

“That’s fine by me.” Teddy smiled, though it was more of a grin. “I’m starting to feel like a cradle robber here, having a young thing like you at my side.”

Billy just snorted and blushed again.

“Shall we continue?” Teddy asked and let go off Billy’s other hand, turning so that they could walk hand in hand.

Billy nodded and together they walked across the wide central nave of the Hall, heading towards a set of doors. Suddenly Billy realised that Teddy was still holding his hand, holding it and not caring if someone saw them. The thought of it, the fact that Teddy almost actively sought to show the world that they were together was a humbling and an elating feeling at the same time. Billy did not know what to say or to do, and the only thing he really could do was to squeeze Teddy’s hand tighter and hope that the King realised how he felt. Teddy noticed his tightening grip and stopped and turned to look at Billy, squeezing back with similar kind of affection. He didn’t say anything but the look in his eyes told Billy that he had to feel the same way that Billy did.

When they finally turned their gaze back towards the set of doors they’d been heading to, George stepped through the doorway and after noticing his King he strode straight towards him and Billy.

George wore an outfit of mostly black, the tunic and rest of his clothing was quite formal and conservative in its fashion, and therefore extremely fitting for a King’s official. Around his neck he wore a large collar, the heavy looking chain of office showing his fealty to the King and marking him as a man in the service of the Crown.

“Good morning, Your Majesty.” George said and bowed, and even though he must have noticed how his King’s and Billy’s hands were clasped together he did not comment on it.

“Good morning to you too, Lord Chancellor.” Teddy said and nodded back.

“I was just about to come and see you because I need your confirmation whether you still intend to convene the Diet.”

“I do.” Teddy nodded. “I think we should have enough time to have it convene before the weather gets too rainy for travelling. Prepare a royal proclamation to summon the Estates and have the draft brought to me as soon as possible.”

George hummed in acknowledgement.

“Also,” The King continued. “There is the matter of the captured rebels, and as they are noblemen the law requires a Court of Realm to be convened so that they can be properly tried and convicted. So I think we should have that organized alongside the extra Diet as well. Saves us the trouble of having to summon the Estates yet again and we can finally put the whole bloody business of the rebellion behind us.”

“Practical idea, sire” George agreed.

“I think we could also try to pass some of the less controversial laws at this extra Diet. We would not have so many things in need of debating in the next spring’s regularly scheduled Diet. The previous Diet two years ago, it lasted, what, three months?”

“Four and a half.” George sighed somewhat wearily.

“Then it’s settled. We’ll try to spread the load evenly. And one final matter,” Teddy added. “I know that there is the tradition of celebrating a victory in a war with a large feast, but I’m not really up to it now. I have some things that require my attendance more pressingly.” Teddy glanced at Billy with a doting smile.

“I’m sure your lords will understand, sire.” George said with a knowing smile. “I do believe they as well wish to return back to their families and estates as quickly as feasible. So shall I inform them that they may leave at their own pleasure?”

“Do that. But inform them that there will be a celebration when the Diet ends; we’ll have the autumn celebrations and the victory feast as one big fête.”

“Two birds with one stone. Excellent idea, sire.”

“You had already thought about all of what I just said, hadn’t you?” Teddy laughed.

“Most certainly not.” George smiled. “I am merely a humble executor of Your Majesty’s most glorious ideas.”

Teddy snorted in an amused way and grinned. “ _Most glorious ideas_ …” Teddy muttered and shook his head still smiling brightly. “Good day to you, George.” He said with a chuckle and pulled Billy along.

But before they stepped through the doorway Teddy suddenly jogged back to his aide and said something to him so quietly that Billy could not hear it, then returning back to Billy after the quick exchange of words.

“Would you like to see the garden?” Teddy asked as they left the Great Hall and strolled along yet another long corridor.

“Yes, please.” Billy said and continued. “I did not know that George is Lord Chancellor, I thought he was just your adjutant.”

“He is both actually. It’s easier to have your personal aide and the Lord Chancellor as one person, makes the decision-making and ruling easier when you don’t have many separate people in need of an explanation.” Teddy said as they slowly progressed along the corridor.

“I was just wondering,” Billy frowned. “Why is he called ‘Lord Chancellor’ when he is one of the Barons of the Realm?”

“That’s because though the title of a Baron of the Realm is on the same level as the Lord Chancellor in rank, the latter takes precedence because if one is the Lord Chancellor then they are member of the Privy Council as well and therefore a Great Officer of the Realm with four other similar heads of five different branches of government.”

“What’s a privy council?”

“It’s a body that advises the monarch and each of the Great Officers of The Realm heads a branch of the Crown’s administration and give advice on state affairs. George’s full tittle is the Lord High Chancellor and he heads the council and the Crown’s administration itself. Then there is the Lord High Treasurer, the Lord High Constable who is responsible for military, and the Lord High Admiral responsible for navy, and finally there is the Lord High Steward who is responsible of supervising justice in the Kingdom. Lord High Steward’s position however is not to be confused with the Steward appointed by the King to rule in his absence.”

“So…” Billy started slowly. “If George was not the Lord Chancellor he would be called Baron this-and-that.”

“Not exactly, Baron of the Realm is not a hereditary title, it’s more of a half-official honorary title bestowed by the monarch to people he or she trusts or otherwise wants to honour. George is in fact Earl of Trenich.”

“So one would address him as… Earl Trenich?”

“No.” Teddy laughed. “Trenich is the name of the county of which George is the Earl of, he would be addressed by his family name as Lord von Creutz.”

“All nobility above a hereditary knight is always addressed as Lord This-and-That, no matter what their title is. Highest ranking title of nobility is a duke, and in a descending order under it are marquis, margrave and landgrave, under them are counts and earls - like George - then come viscounts, then barons - the hereditary sort - ” Teddy added. “Then under them are hereditary knights and they are the ones you call Sir This-and-That,”

Billy just stared at Teddy with a somewhat stunned expression.

“Then there are the knights with an honorary, non-hereditary, title of knighthood granted to them by a monarch and they are called ‘Sir’ as well, and finally at the bottom are the junkers who are the lowest ranking lesser nobles.”

“So let’s see if I understand it correctly.” Billy said slowly. “George is addressed as Lord Chancellor because it is such a high office in the King’s service, but if he was not Chancellor then he would be addressed as Lord von Creutz even though his tittle is Earl of Trenich.”

“Yes, though of course there are the exceptions to the rule for some earls, as some are traditionally addressed by the name of the place of which they are the Duke or Earl or whatever of, for example in Earl Warenne’s case. And of course there are other exceptions, incongruities and other absurdities when it comes to the system of ranking nobility.”

“How on earth do you know who is who and from where and what is the proper way to address them?” Billy uttered in disbelief.

Teddy threw back his head and laughed heartily. “That’s just it,” He grinned. “Most people don’t, but usually everyone is so keen to make their rank known that it usually comes out relatively quickly. Though, I as the King have one thing going for me.”

“And what is that?”

“I could call everyone James and no one would correct me. So… let’s go and see the gardens, James.”

Billy snorted and gently elbowed Teddy’s side.

The King again laughed heartily and snaked his arm around the smaller man, pulling Billy against his side as they walked out of a door and in to a small courtyard. They crossed the small, paved close and walked through a small gate, guarded by a single sentry who took attention as they passed under the archway and suddenly Billy found himself looking at what had to be one of the most beautiful scenes he had ever seen.

He was looking at a garden, not an overly large one, though, perhaps hundred yards wide and hundred and fifty in length, almost a perfect rectangle with trees planted in neat rows and lines, and under them bushes of different kinds of flowers - mainly roses - growing. Paths meandered between the carefully kept plants and the green grass looked so soft and inviting that despite the cool autumn morning Billy felt like throwing himself down on to it so that he could gaze up at the slowly moving clouds high above.

Teddy lead them further into the garden, right at the centre of it, and Billy realised that the middle of the garden was actually slightly lower than its edges, not by much, but enough that the raised edges blocked the wind, thus creating a small artificial vale where it felt slightly warmer. It was as if they were standing at the bottom of a very large, shallow bowl.

“It’s beautiful in here.” Billy said as they stood at the edge of a small, rectangular pond that reflected the blue sky above them.

“It is.” Teddy said and moved behind Billy, wrapping his arms around him and leaning down to rest his chin on Billy’s shoulder. “I like to spend time in here. It reminds me of my mother.”

“Was this her garden?” Billy asked and pressed himself against the King’s front.

“It was. She wanted to have a garden near her and decided that this was the perfect spot. This used to be the jousting field actually, but my mother had it relocated outside the city walls to create her little garden. She never really liked jousting anyway, thought it to be tedious and pointless.”

“Is it?”

“Eh.” Teddy hummed and Billy could feel him shrug. “It is, in my opinion, quite fun to watch and to participate in and I don’t personally consider it to be tedious. But to consider it pointless… There is a kernel of truth in that. Sure, you need decent aim with a lance and some riding skills to be an effective jouster, but it really does not represent war in any form or shape. Jousting really is - if one is being completely honest - a form of cordial peacetime combat held in a polite, festive environment, where people suffering brutal horrible bloody death would ruin the mood. So I suppose my mother was right when she described it as purposeless.”

“Are you a good jouster?”

Teddy pressed his forehead against the side of Billy’s head and he could feel the blond smiling.

“Why, I’m the best jouster in the whole Kingdom. Next time there is a royal joust I shall vanquish all who come against me and do it in your name, my love.”

“Oh.” Billy whispered and shivered as Teddy nosed down his neck, pressing small kisses against the delicate skin there which was not covered by his tunic’s collar.

“Mhmm.” The King hummed and Billy could feel the vibrations of the strong chest against his back. “I will claim you as my prize and we shall ride to sunset together. Would you like that?”

“As long as it is you who does the claiming then I would like that very much.” Billy said and trembled again when Teddy made a low, almost a growl kind of a sound.

“You would look beautiful.” Teddy said roughly and wound his arms tighter around Billy. “The Royal Stand would be full of young noblemen and -women, every single one of them expecting that their King would ride to them to ask for their handkerchief because they would think that their preening, smarmy smiles and eyelash-batting would have caught my eye. But no, I would ride to you, Billy. I would ride to you and hop down, throw away my helm and pull you against me. People would gape and gawk; those haughty, uptight aristocratic bastards would just stare and be flabbergasted when I would lean down and kiss you. Kiss you in front of the whole world and make them see that there is no one else in the world for me but you.”

“Te- Teddy.” Billy whimpered as Teddy pressed another smouldering kiss against his neck.

“The whole dreadful world would see that you are mine, and mine alone. And that I am yours, only yours and no-one else’s.”

“Whe- Where would you take me?” Billy asked breathily and turned in the cradle of Teddy’s arms, looking up. “To your favourite place in the world maybe?”

“No.” Teddy murmured, pressing his forehead against Billy’s, blinking slowly. “I would not have to take you to the place most dear to me in the world for me, for having you near me would make any place the best place in the world. As long as you are there with me I would be content.”

“I…” Billy said softly. “I think I feel the same way. I really would be happy so long as you would be there with me. I would lead my life quite happily on the road and sleep under the stars if I could share that life with you. Not that I mind sleeping in your bed, it’s so soft and wa-”

Teddy cut him off with a kiss, bringing his large and warm hands to Billy’s cheeks.

“Our bed.” The King said with another kiss. “Our rooms.” Teddy kissed again. “And our lives. What I have is yours and whatever you desire I will give to you.”

“I only want you.” Billy murmured and buried his face in the crook of Teddy’s neck.

“You already have me.” Teddy whispered and crushed Billy in an embrace that conveyed more things than a thousand words could.

They stood there, embracing one another for a good long while in the cool autumn morning, until finally the need of closeness in both was sated. Only for a moment though, their long embraces had become a thing Billy craved and needed and he would gladly spend the remainder of his time on earth in Teddy’s strong, safe hold.

They meandered slowly through the rosebushes, Teddy leading them towards the far end of the garden and as the ground ever so slowly rose, Billy realised one thing; the walls of the garden were very low. The battlements here were only as high as a regular man was tall and that was very puzzling, especially when considering how the rest of the castle was heavily fortified. It felt peculiar that this part of the castle was so ill-defended and Billy was about to ask why the walls were such, but when they walked nearer to one of the crenelated walls Billy immediately understood why the walls were as they were.

The drop down to the level of the city was dizzying. The steep, almost vertical shear of the crag fell at least two hundred feet and was so without features, cracks or ledges, without any footholds that no-one could climb it. It was in its own natural form the ultimate battlement. The human made parapet that crowned it and surrounded the garden was there merely to prevent people on top of the crag from tumbling down to their deaths.

As Billy peered down over the wall he noticed that Altburg didn’t surround the entire crag and that the city wall in fact was built in such a manner that it ended against the side of the rock, meaning that backside of the crag acted as one of the walls of the city.

The landscape on this side of the city was more or less the same as on the side from which they had entered Altburg yesterday, with copses of trees here and there dotting the farmland and smoke rising from the chimneys of farmhouses as people in them warmed their dwellings. From this height everything looked beautiful and serene but Billy knew perfectly well that people were busily preparing for the arrival of winter, making sure that there was enough hay to feed the livestock and preparing salted pork, preservatives, and other such long-lasting foods that would see them into the next year.

“Shall we go back inside?” Teddy asked after a while.

“Let’s go.” Billy replied and turned towards the castle. “It’s a bit cold.”

Teddy was already frowning and about to say something when Billy cut him off after seeing that adorably concerned expression.

“I’m not freezing, if that is what worries you. You don’t need to take off your tunic and shirt and go about with your torso naked while I’m wearing your clothes.” Billy smiled. “Not that I mind seeing you without a shirt on.” He added with a small, shy smile.

“Is that so?” Teddy grinned, slipping his large arm around Billy’s waist as they headed back in. “Am I to understand that you do not consider me to be completely and utterly hideous.”

“I suppose your handsome face and lovely smile, your golden hair and blue eyes, and your bulging muscles are in some way attractive.” Billy smiled, feeling a slight blush creeping up his cheeks.

“Good to know.” Teddy laughed and they walked back inside.

 

 

Once they were back in the Great Hall Teddy lead Billy through yet another set of doors and along a well-lit, wide corridor and they passed several people who looked like Crown’s officials, all of whom bowed to the King as they passed them.

Finally Billy found himself standing in front of a large door that was slightly ajar, with a sound of several people drifting through the gap. Teddy nodded encouragingly, gesturing Billy to peek in, which he did.

It was a large room, its arched ceiling being held up by two rows of columns that ran right through the centre of the space. On each ends of the hall there were large fireplaces with roaring fires burning in them, flanked by doors leading to some other part of the castle. The room was bright and airy with its lime washed and lightly coloured walls, the large windows on one wall providing ample amounts of natural light to supplement the lanterns and candles that had been hung from the ceiling and walls. It wasn’t however the room itself that peaked Billy’s curiosity, it was the people who worked in the chamber that made Billy wonder. There were perhaps a bit under three dozen people working in the room, some were sitting by a table, writing things down with inky fingers on large pieces of parchment or in thick, leather bound books. Some had counting boards and tokens in front of them as they kept tally and made marks in their books. They had to be ledgers of some kind, Billy realised, as one of the people started to count coins in front of him, methodically dividing the pieces of silver in neat little stacks. What Billy however found most puzzling was the fact that there was a small, constant chatter happening in the room. Yes, people were working diligently, but they were still exchanging words with the person next to them, someone near the back was even tittering at something that her companion had said.

“Who are they?” Billy asked as he withdrew away from the door.

“The Royal Scribes.” Teddy replied as they took few steps away from the door.

“You mean they transcribe books?”

“No, not exactly. The scribes are the ones who do the actual administrative work of Löwe. They keep track of the Crown’s incomes and expenditures, count the taxes revenues, prepare and process the official documents which are sent out to provinces or back to Altburg, and in general handle all the matters that in the end need the Crown’s, as in my approval. They are more or less the crew that makes sure that the ship of state functions properly and stays in course.”

“Are they nobility?” Billy asked, having noticed how well-dressed the people inside had been.

“God no.” Teddy snorted. “The Kingdom would go bankrupt in a fortnight if that lot were ever again allowed to do the administrative work.”

“Who are they then?”

“Sons and daughters of peasantry and burghers mostly.”

Billy stared in a slight astonishment. “How? I mean... People don’t rise above their place in the society, so how can a peasant…”

“How can a peasant work in the King’s service as something else than a lowly servant?” Teddy provided.

Billy just nodded dumbly.

“Well, during the reign of my great-grandfather and before that they couldn’t have. Back then - and I suppose to some extent even nowadays - the estate you belonged to more or less defined what you could be or do.”

Billy again nodded mutely. He didn’t say it out loud, but he knew perfectly well how your estate defined you, or rather the lack of it in his case. It had more than once been made perfectly clear to Billy that he was nothing but scum, an estateless wanderer who should just stay away from the decent and hardworking people who were members of one of the four estates. It was a rigid and unchallengeable system where change was practically unheard of. Occasionally a very rich burgher might marry someone from a noble family in need of cash, or a well-to-do peasant marry up and wed a burgher if the union was beneficial for both families. But in general people’s statuses were seen as god-given, immutable facts of life which were sacred, and breaking the order was highly frowned upon by everyone, especially by those on the top of the system. Simply put: no one should break the harmonious order of the society, not even the King.

“I suppose you are wondering why the scribes are mainly burghers and peasants.” Teddy said, not having noticed Billy’s fleeting moment of pondering.

Billy snapped back to the present and nodded. “Well… Yes.”

“It is simply because they tend to be more diligent and skilled in their work than the people from other walks of life. Those who come from the lower estates usually have a clear understanding that money does not grow on trees and that you must be careful with it. Keeping track of the goods you are selling, making sure that the ledgers are coherent and accurate, and estimating the yield of a particular plot of land, that all is vital when you are running a farm or a business. So, who better to manage the affairs of a Kingdom, which is basically a very large farm, than those who are familiar with numbers?”

“Has it been like this very long?”

“Nearly a century, almost from the start of my grandfather’s reign. The re-organization of the Crown’s administration was his idea. He was the one who created the Royal Scribes to manage the bureaucracy of the Kingdom. During his father’s reign and before that the handling of official matters of state had been the task of nobility. They had been the ones who managed the Kingdoms affairs, some in their fiefs as the local overlords and some as the Crown’s officials here in the capitol. It was a system where highly educated men managed the land’s affairs, a system that was utterly ineffective and broken.”

“In what way was it broken?” Billy frowned.

“Their positions were hereditary, so once the father died a son or a daughter inherited the post, then they died and their child inherited the position and so it went for decade after decade, century after century. Problem with this system however was that people grew fat and content, they became either lazy, corrupted, or incompetent. Or all three in some cases. Finally they could barely bother to pretend that they were still serving the Crown rather than themselves. They started to help themselves to whatever fancied them, started to steal from the Crown, from the peasants and burghers they were supposed to keep safe. Some went as far as to steal from the Church.”

Teddy sighed and continued.

“This went on for a long time, but it finally escalated to a point where things had to change. My great-grandfather - who as it happens was my namesake, as in Theodore II - was a lousy ruler, ineffective and lacklustre. In one word: useless. But his son, my grandfather, was not. When he ascended the throne after his father had died relatively young he started a series of reforms. This didn’t suit the ruling nobility, not by one bit, and they started to think that maybe it was time to have a ruler who would do as _they_ wanted. So, naturally, they rebelled. My grandfather then had to defend his crown with arms, but once the fighting was over and the rebellion had ended he could start afresh.”

“The rebelling lords and nobility yielded?”

“In a way, yes.” Teddy shrugged. “Let’s just say that many noble families that existed before the revolt did not exist after it.”

“You mean…”

“You either hung from the gallows for the sport of local crows or you made a close but brief acquaintance with the executioner’s block.”

“Oh.”

“It was a bloody affair, but the slate was wiped clean and my grandfather could begin his reforms that in the end helped to better the lives of his ordinary subjects.”

“Were the reforms successful?”

Teddy just shrugged noncommittedly.

“Did they try again, the lords I mean?” Billy asked.

“No, not during my grandfather’s reign nor when my mother ruled. I however cannot say the same thing.” Teddy smiled ruefully.

 

 

Teddy again took the lead and they walked a short distance from the chamber where the scribes worked, ending up standing in front of a fairly regular looking and unassuming door. The King knocked on it and Billy realised that there was no ring or any other kind of handle on the door, not even a keyhole to break its plain oaken surface.

The door swung inwards without a sound, opened by a guard wearing a mail armour and a surcoat. Teddy stepped through the doorway and Billy followed on his heels, noting that the door was not actually made of wood, in fact only a thin layer of oak had been attached on it to give it appearance that it was made of wood, while in reality the door was made of solid metal.

Billy found himself standing in what appeared to be a windowless guardroom, with six men-at-arms guarding it. A shiver ran down his back as he gave a quick glance around the room, he didn’t like closed spaces at all, but he was with Teddy and that gave him a modicum of comfort, enough that he again followed the blond when he walked through yet another door and down stone steps that headed somewhere deep under the castle.

The stairway was reasonably well lit, with candles inside lanterns guiding the way as they walked down the steps that had been carved straight into the bedrock itself. The air was cool but not cold, and despite the fact that they were deep underground it did not get damp. They still had to be so high above the groundwater that it seeping in was not an issue.

As they descended deeper into the rock Billy started to feel uneasy. Where was Teddy leading him?

“Whe- Where are we going?” Billy stopped and asked quietly, standing a couple of steps above Teddy.

“To the vaults.” Teddy said and turned to look at Billy.

“The dungeons?” Billy whispered, feeling a tremor going up his spine, a tremor which did not go unnoticed by the King.

“Oh, Billy. I’m sorry, I did not think. All of this stone around us, enclosed space… I’m sorry. And no, we are not going to the dungeons. The vaults are only for storage and I just have to fetch something from one of them.” Teddy said softly, taking a step closer. “If you don’t want to come down there then that’s fine. You can go back up if you so wish, I don’t mind.

Billy bit his lip and took deep breath.

“I’ll come with you.” He said and grasped the King’s large, calloused hand, squeezing it tightly for a moment. Teddy squeezed right back and then Billy let go.

The flight of steps ended soon after that and Billy found himself standing in a room hewn straight out of solid rock, there were three doors in the chamber, one straight in front of him and one his left and right.

Teddy walked over to the door opposite of the stairs and unlocked it, using a large key that was already sticking out of the heavy-duty lock. The hinges of the door squeaked slightly as the King pulled the door open and stepped in.

Billy again followed dutifully and took in the room he was now standing in. It as well was carved straight out of the bedrock, with only the floor made of more level and smooth paving stones. The ceiling of the stone chamber was held up by four, thick columns that were also cut from the rock itself, supporting the immense weight of the stone above. It wasn’t an overly large room, perhaps thirty feet wide and fifty in its length. As Teddy had said, it looked like a storage space rather than a damp cell. Quickly however Billy noticed the long, wooden, rectangular chests that were placed between the columns and pushed against the walls, and for a moment he thought that they were coffins. They weren’t however, Billy realised, as they were far too large and far too reinforced with metal to be final resting places of the dead.

When Teddy walked over to one of the chests and flipped its lid open Billy finally realised what the boxes were; they were coffers, not coffins.

Billy swallowed thickly and walked nearer, barely comprehending the sight in front of him. The large chest was full of gold, the coins within gleaming brightly even in the soft light of the lanterns. He just stared numbly as Teddy opened the lid of another coffer, then another, and another…

Billy’s eyes scanned the room, counting at least thirty identical reinforced trunks, and the ones which had been opened by the King; they as well were full of gold. Billy stared numbly as Teddy sat on the edge of one of the coffers, scooping up the coins with his hand and then letting them fall back into the trunk with small clinks.

“Are… Are they all full of…” Billy’s words petered out as Teddy watched him.

“Full of gold?”

Billy nodded.

“Yes.” Teddy replied impassively. “The second vault is full of silver and the third is filled with jewellery and other valuables. You asked whether the reforms started by my grandfather were successful, so… what do you think?”

“I… I never even imagined that there could be this much gold in the entire world.” Billy whispered, feeling stunned.

Teddy stood up without a word and closed the lid of the coffer he had sat on. He nodded towards one of the chests and Billy closed the heavy lid of the one he was nearest to, eyes still glued to the pieces of precious metal within.

As Billy closed the rest of the coffers Teddy walked over to a table that stood at the centre of the room, with couple of stools under it, and a set of scales and some small weights on it waiting to be used. Billy recognized the type of scales immediately; it was similar to the ones used by merchants to count their coins, Johann also had had a similar set. There was also a small satchel on the table, made of dark, tanned leather with a shoulder strap attached to it.

The King beckoned Billy closer and glanced at him when he got closer and stood quietly next to him.

“I want you to have this.” Teddy said and slid the satchel nearer to Billy.

Billy glanced at the King and still remained silent. He reached out to open the leather pouch, but he was almost certain of what was inside and still his breath left him when he flipped open the satchel’s leather flap. Large shining gold coins filled the pouch and Billy reached down to pick one up.

The coin felt heavy in his hand and he could already imagine himself spending it and the rest of its companions in the bag. With this amount of gold he could buy anything, a very large farm or townhouse, or even a small manor house, and still he would have enough money to spend the rest of his life in the lap of luxury. He could buy the best of furniture, expensive foods and wines, even books. He could don himself in the finery of an aristocrat; clad himself in the finest garments made of softest wool and finest silk. People would see him not as an estateless pauper. No, they would not see him as that; they would see him as a _whore_.

They would see him as their King’s whore, a kept boy, as that pretty little thing that kept the King warm at night and his cock happy. They would smile and talk sweetly to him, try to curry favours so that they could get close to the King. But behind his back and Billy’s back, however, they would sneer at him and would try to find out how this little, meaningless peasant boy had wrapped their ruler around his little finger.

Billy dropped the coin back into the satchel.

“I don’t want it.” Billy said with a wavering voice.

“Bil- What do you mean? Why not?”

“You have already given more than I deserve, clothes, new life, yourself… Taking this money would be greedy and I don’t deserve it. I don’t want to be paid because tha- That would mean that I’m a whore, I’m no- I’m not a whore.” Billy whispered, words petering out and he swallowed thickly.

“Billy.” Teddy said softly, bringing his warm, comforting hands up to cradled Billy’s head between them.

“I don’t want to give you this money because I want you to… To be obliged to do something or to behave in a certain manner. I want you to have this gold so that you would have options if need be. Having this money would mean that you could be independent, and I don’t mean that you would have to use this money to buy things for yourself because I’ll give you the world if you ask.”

Teddy sighed and brought their foreheads together.

“You’d be free to leave.” Teddy whispered. “If there ever would be a reason for you to leave, then, with this money, you could.”

“Why would I leave? I’d never leave you.”

“You might want to or have to.” Teddy murmured. “Maybe someday you would realize that you don’t love me or perhaps I would turn into something different. Become… Become like Norris.”

Billy stilled and pulled back so that he could look into Teddy’s eyes.

“Never.” He whispered, the mere idea of someone like Teddy becoming a monster like Norris making him almost ill. “Not you, never.”

“You never know what might happen.” Teddy said with sad seriousness.

“I’ve seen it happening. Men coming back from war, the things done by them or to them weighing them down, hits to their head changing them, twisting their personalities. You don’t even need a war for that to happen. Steve’s friend, Lord Banner, he received a serious blow to his head in a joust and he changed. He is still a kind and brilliant man, but the blow did something to his temper, he became… volatile. Before the hit he was always level headed and never lost his cool, but now if he loses control he becomes erratic and violent, and it takes a long while for him to calm down. And when he finally calms he rarely remembers the things he has done during his bout of rage. That is a thing I don’t want to experience, Billy. I don’t want to hit my head and then come back to my senses after some fit of rage only to find you bleeding and bruised at my feet. I want you to be able to be leave before something like that could ever happen. It would destroy me if something like that would happen, so that is why I want you to have this gold, I want you to have an escape route if need be.”

Billy wanted to argue, wanted to come up with objections to Teddy’s reasoning, but he knew how right the King was in his thinking. People could change both ways, bad becoming good and vice-versa. And if he would have had even a tiniest of fractions of the money in the pouch when he was with Norris he could have at least tried to escape.

“I… I’ll take the money, but I don’t want to take it away from here to you- To our rooms.” Billy glanced at Teddy who nodded.

“That’s fine. You can keep it here and ask George to get it for you if need be. He’ll help you no matter what, as will Steve.”

“But George serves you and Prince Steven is your cousin.” Billy said quietly. “Surely they would not go against their King’s will.”

“They would. Both of them are good men and would do what is right, Steve especially. Go to him if you need help in… in getting away from me. He would never be afraid to oppose me if he thinks something I’m doing is unjust and wrong.”

Billy nodded mutely and took a step closer, wrapping his arms around Teddy’s familiar broadness and breathing him in.

“I just need to get one more thing before we leave.” Teddy mumbled into Billy’s hair.

“Mhmm.” Billy murmured, his voice muffled against the King’s chest.

Teddy ended their embrace and walked over to one of the coffers and Billy noted that it was slightly different from the rest, being slightly bigger and ornate. It even had a lock on it, whilst the rest of the chests were without one. From one of his pockets Teddy fished out a slender key and used it to open the locked trunk, revealing its contents.

The chest was full of crowns.

There were crowns of many different shapes and styles, sizes varying from ones that could be worn by a child to ones that looked more fitting for men and others being clearly designed for women. There was one crown however that drew in Billy’s gaze. The headwear sat in its own separate compartment on a soft looking pillow at one end of the large wooden chest.

It did not look like any other crown in the trunk. This was much larger and heavier looking and instead of being round like all other crowns in the chest, this one was octagonal. Instead of being a continuous ring of metal, this crown was made of eight hinged plates which arched at the top. The whole crown was studded with pearls and precious stones of many colours and shapes. Even in the low lighting of the vault the crown shined brightly, the jewels illuminated in such a manner that it looked as if there was a source of light within each one of them.

Teddy noticed Billy’s staring and lifted the crown gently from its soft bedding. “Edward the Unifier’s crown.” The King said as he slowly turned the crown in his hands. “Nowadays used as the coronation crown. So, what do you think?”

“Well, it is…” Billy uttered, trying to find the right words to describe the crown.

“It is a hideous and heavy eye sore, that’s what it is.” Teddy said with a grin. “Damn thing weighs a ton and is so bloody uncomfortable that wearing it for more than an hour is practically torture.”

“Well,” Billy said, smile on his lips. “It’s a bit… much.”

“Well that is an understatement if I’ve ever heard one.” Teddy grinned. “It looks as if the people who made it have just gobbled together every single shiny rock within ten leagues and just stuck them on and went ‘Right, that’s done’. I mean look at that one.”

The King pointed at one of the green jewels attached to the crown.

“That thing looks like something I coughed up last winter when I had a bad case of the ague.”

“It does a bit, yes.” Billy laughed. “Aren’t you going to wear it?” He asked as Teddy lowered the crown back in its slot.

“No. Trying to wear that thing daily would leave me with constant neck- and headache. The crown I wear routinely is much lighter and simpler.”

It was only then that Billy realised that he had never seen Teddy wearing a crown before.

“Teddy, I was wondering, why have you not worn a crown before? You are the King, isn’t it, well, part of the job.”

“It is,” Teddy chuckled. “Part of the job as you said, and I usually have crown upon my head, but in war the ways are slightly different. It has been a tradition from who knows how long since, that, when the monarch leaves for war they leave their crown home. It has got something to do with the fact that a crown somehow symbolises peacetime authority and in war your authority is represented by your helm, shield and sword and all the other trappings of a military campaign. Though, I’ve heard a story that the whole practice was started by Karl IV who actually just forgot his crown back home and was too embarrassed to send someone to fetch it, so he just came with the previous reason just to save face.”

“Have you ever forgotten your crown somewhere?” Billy asked with a small smile.

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” Teddy laughed and picked up another crown from the chest.

This piece of royal headwear was a far cry from the overbearing opulence of the coronation crown. It was a relatively simple golden circlet with very little decorations; there was only a fir-twig motif on its rim which went around the entire golden band, its dark green enamelled colour contrasting poignantly with the soft gleam of the gold. The crown looked the same from every angle, except from the front, well, from the side which Billy assumed to be the front. This raised edge at the front formed a peak that had the crown’s only precious stone embedded on it. It was a dark green rock - emerald perhaps - which was cut so that its many facets shined and flickered beautifully in the undulating light of the vaults lanterns. But all in all it was a very simple crown even when compared to the more modest crowns in the trunk and Billy had already guessed whose crown it was.

“This is the crown I wear on day to day basis.” Teddy said and turned the golden band in his hands. “It’s much more comfortable to wear than anything else in that box.”

“Is it your own design?”

“Not really, I just asked for a decent looking, light crown that would be comfortable enough to be worn on a regular basis.”

“Is it?”

“It is, surprisingly.” Teddy nodded and turned, holding out the crown. “Here, see it yourself.”

“I… Is it appropriate?”

“It’s just an expensive piece of metal, nothing more.” Teddy said softly, still holding out the crown.

Billy hesitated for a moment until he finally dared to reach out and gingerly took hold of the headwear. As Billy held it he realised that Teddy’s words had been true; the crown really was just a beautiful piece of expensive metal, nothing more mysterious or reverent than that. And the crown was, as the King had said, surprisingly light.

“See, just a golden band made more important than it ought to be simply by the fact that it is worn by me and not a regular person. There is one thing however that would make this crown more precious to me than any other crown in my possession.”

Before Billy could ask Teddy to elaborate the King had kneeled in front of Billy and was now looking up at him with a serious, but gentle, expression.

“Te- Teddy.” Billy stammered. “Get up, you are the King. You… You should not be kneeling in front of anyone, least in front of someone like me.”

“Someone like you?”

“A king should not be kneeling in front of a- a pauper.”

“And why shouldn’t he be?”

“Because it is not… not right.”

Teddy sighed and raised his hands, bringing them to Billy’s hips and pulling him closer. Even in this position the King’s large hands conveyed protection and care, their warmth seeping through Billy’s clothes and sending small shiver up his back.

“It may not be right in the eyes of the society. It might be a preposterous idea in people’s opinion that their King kneels in front of someone, an estateless man particularly. But,”

Teddy’s voice lowered to a dark timbre, sending even greater tremors up Billy’s spine.

“I am their sovereign, I am their ruler, and I am their god anointed _King._ I am only answerable to god and god alone. I was brought to this world for one purpose and one purpose only, and that is to rule. If I so wish whatever I say is the law and whatever I do is right. Lesser men do not have the right to question me for I am their ruler and this land, this kingdom in flesh. My bones are its rocks and my blood is its streams, I am it as much as it is me. For people to question me, my decisions, my _authority_ , is to question the land itself. And they will _not_ question my decisions, especially not when they concern the man I love, so if wish to prostrate myself in front of you then that is for me, and only for me, to decide.”

Billy could only stare, his hands shaking at the sound of Teddy’s dark tone.

“I was crowned by the archbishop, anointed with holy oil and the feeling of being blessed I got from that was nothing when compared to the feeling of being blessed which I get when I am with you. So, Billy, would you crown me, bless me with your hands?”

Billy nodded unsteadily as he brought the crown higher and gently lowered it on Teddy’s head, the golden gleam of the crown and the King’s hair trying to outmatch each other.

Teddy reached up and softly grabbed Billy’s narrow wrists, bringing his hands to cradle his head for a moment, then proceeding to place a chaste kiss on the inside of Billy’s wrist.

“Thank you, my love. Thank you, Billy.”

“Teddy.” Billy whispered hoarsely and the King understood the message completely.

Teddy stood up, again towering over Billy, and he pulled him into a soft embrace, winding his large arms securely around the raven-haired man. Billy gratefully leaned in, his nose brushing against Teddy’s throat and the King himself buried his face in the soft strands of his love’s hair.

“Thank you.” Teddy said quietly again.

 

 

They left the vault and Billy felt relieved when he once again was in the vast openness of the Great Hall. There were groups of people gathered here and there in the hall and whenever Billy and the King passed them they bowed to the ruler, making interested glances at Billy. Teddy however passed the groups mostly with quick acknowledgements, sharing a few quick words with some of the people. He however was apparently keen to leave the hall as quickly as possible and so Billy and he did not dawdle in the Great Hall for long.

Once again they were walking along one of the long corridors of the castle and Billy actually recognized it as the one leading towards the royal apartments. They however did not walk past the guards that guarded them and into Teddy’s rooms; instead the King led Billy to a solid looking oak door nearby and nodded towards it encouragingly.

“Go on, see what’s inside.” Teddy smiled.

Billy raised an eyebrow and just shrugged, pushing the door open.

If the amount of gold in the vaults had left him speechless, then this sight as well struck him dumb.

Books, Billy was looking at books.

There were leather and cloth bound books on every surface of the room, in neat rows on shelves, stacked on couple of tables at the centre of the room, in piles on the wooden floor. Small books, large books, thin little things you could read in an hour stacked on top of massive tomes that would take two weeks to read through and books of every size and form in between. But the amount of them was the one thing that Billy really could not comprehend; there had to be hundreds, no, thousands of books in the room. Not even in his wildest dreams had Billy ever imagined that someone besides the richest of monasteries could own this many books. Even Norris who wasn’t exactly poor, even he had owned only perhaps dozen or so books and that had been considered to be a sign of an educated man, not that the lord had ever actually bothered to read any of them.

Billy slowly walked further into the room, just trying to wrap his head around all of it. He had already learned that Teddy liked books, a trunk in his tent had been full of them and Billy had actually thought that the King had taken all of his books with him on his campaign. Clearly it had not been so, and then Billy noticed the trunk in question where it stood pushed against one of the bookshelves, looking decidedly small and unassuming in the large library.

“So…” Teddy asked, having walked right behind Billy. “Do you like it.”

Billy glanced at the King. “What do you think?” He huffed and Teddy just grinned.

“May I?” Billy reached out to pick up a book from a nearby table.

“Of course.” Teddy nodded. “Feel free to come here whenever you wish and to take whatever you want.”

“You said that you liked books.” Billy said slowly. “But I never even imagined that…”

“That I may have gone a bit overboard in my book collecting.” Teddy smirked and gazed in a loving manner at the numerous books around them. “What can I say?” Teddy shrugged. “I like my books.”

“Clearly.” Billy huffed fondly and put away the book he had been inspecting. “You are a learned man, not just a pretty face.” Billy smirked and glanced at Teddy.

Teddy snorted and suddenly his big hands were around Billy’s waist, effortlessly lifting him on a nearby table, causing him to make a small, surprised squeak.

“I’ll show you pretty.” Teddy murmured and kept his hands there on Billy’s waist for a moment, then sliding them down to his slender hips and keeping them there in a possessive manner. Teddy leaned in and pressed his forehead against Billy’s.

“The one with a pretty face in here is you.” The King murmured. “You’re the prettiest thing in the entire Kingdom. Not a single other person in Löwe is as beautiful as you.”

“That’s debatable.” Billy murmured and reached up to give Teddy a small kiss.

“No it isn’t.” Teddy murmured back. “I’m the King and my word is the law. Therefore you are the most beautiful thing in existence. Period.”

“So now I am the prettiest thing in the whole of existence?”

“Mhmm.” The King hummed deep in his throat.

Billy didn’t say anything to that; he just pressed a small kiss against Teddy’s jaw. Then the King was again manhandling him, lifting him off the table and back to his feet. There was a small exited grin on Teddy’s lips as he dragged Billy along.

“We still have got things to see.”

“Is it far?” Billy asked. “I feel like I’ve been walking for miles this morning.”

“No, it’s not far. But I can offer some rest for your weary legs.” Teddy grinned and before Billy could take another step further, the King had scooped him up in his arms.

“Teddy!” Billy squeaked, and then laughed. “You have got to stop picking me up at every instance. I am more than capable to walk on my own legs.”

 

_Well, most of the time I am._

 

“I don’t doubt it.” Teddy smiled. “But I like to carry you around and whenever you give me the faintest of reasons to do that I will exploit it mercilessly.”

“What will people think?” Billy murmured, this time it was more in a form of fond teasing than anything else.

“I think we’ve established it quite well that I don’t give a tinker’s damn about what people think of it.” Teddy said lovingly and nuzzled against the side of Billy’s head as they passed the guards who stood on watch outside the royal apartments.

They had finally after the lengthy tour ended up back in the King’s, no, _their_ rooms. Something however had changed in the royal bedchamber in their absence. The two high-backed chairs in front of the large fireplace that kept the room warm had been replaced with a piece of furniture that was unlike anything Billy had ever seen. This thing was like a deep and wide bench but instead of just being made of wood and having some pillows for some comfort, this thing was fully covered in thick, large, and most importantly, soft looking padded cushions. In fact it looked as if the pillows were attached to the wooden frame itself, not just lying on top of it.

“What is that?” Billy asked as he stared at the peculiar piece of furniture with wide eyes.

“That, my love, is a sofa.”

“What do you do on it?”

“Sit, rest, lie down and relax, the possibilities are endless…” Teddy murmured and Billy could feel how that King was smirking against the side of Billy’s jaw.

“Oh…” Billy muttered and felt himself blushing. “Where does it come from? I’ve never seen one of these things anywhere before.”

“It’s a quite a new thing. One of our ambassadors to the orient kingdoms was introduced to it and he brought the idea back with him. It’s still a relatively rare thing to have, but I happen to find it quite comfortable, and I think that you will too.”

Before Billy could say more Teddy had already lowered him down onto the sofa and Billy was helpless to prevent a sigh of pleasure from escaping between his lips as he stretched himself on the soft cushions.

“This is so comfortable.” Billy murmured contently, as Teddy sat next to his prone figure and started to run his fingers through Billy’s hair, his fingernails scraping along the scalp in a very pleasurable manner.

“I told you that you would enjoy it.” Teddy said softly and continued his gentle ministrations for a moment. “We still have one more room to see and I think it will be your favourite one, well, perhaps after the library.”

Teddy stood up and pulled Billy up and they headed towards two doors in the corner of the room.

“The left one is the garderobe so there’s nothing to see there.”

“What’s that?” Billy frowned.

“The privy.”

“Oh.” Billy muttered, occasionally Teddy used words that were utterly unfamiliar for him but the King never seemed irritated when Billy asked for an explanation.

Teddy pushed the door on the right open and gestured Billy to go through, which he did.

Third time that day Billy was struck speechless by the sight that greeted him.

The room wasn’t a large one, in fact it was quite small, and instead if being clad in wood panelling like the other rooms in the King’s apartments, this room was clad in stone. The floor was made of beautiful wavy-patterned light stone, marble perhaps, and the walls were covered in intricately laid mosaics. The thousands of tiny little tesserae formed a striking depiction of a green, lush forest, and amongst the green and brown and other little tesserae there were golden ones to mimic sunlight glinting off of the deep green leaves. One could almost imagine birds singing in the canopy and large bumblebees flying by, lazily buzzing as they went.

The room’s ceiling was perhaps the most beautiful thing Billy had yet seen in the castle, the way the vault was painted with beautiful azure blue and the way in which it mimicked an evening sky was beyond comprehension. Billy could almost believe that he was standing in a woodland glade in a warm summer’s eve, and the room’s noticeable warmth made that even easier to believe.

The room’s purpose was still a mystery for Billy and he was about to ask what the room was for, but then he noticed the large bathtub in the middle of the chamber, partially sunk into the floor. Calling it a bathtub was a slight understatement, though, for the tub was more of a small pool than anything else. It was carved out of solid stone, alabaster perhaps, and could probably hold comfortably four or five people.

The tub Teddy he had shared in the King’s tent had been large, of course, but this tub and room were both clearly built with the phrase ‘fit for a king’ in mind. The room was beyond sumptuous and lavish, it was almost out of the pure imagination.

“Bugger me.” Billy whispered in astonishment as he took few steps further into the room, his feet meeting the soft, oriental style rugs that covered the stone floor near the tub.

“Perhaps later.” Teddy said levelly, though, clearly trying to supress a small grin.

Billy blushed; he really had walked right into that one.

Then he noticed a very peculiar thing at the side of the bathtub. There were two identical brass spouts side by side and they looked similar to the ones one might find attached to a beer barrel in an ale house. Though, of course, the taps on barrels of beer were made of wood rather than metal.

“What are those?” Billy asked as he leaned to inspect the pair of taps.

“See for yourself.” Teddy said enigmatically.

Billy frowned and decided to do just that.

He turned the other tap’s sizable handle and he had to use some force to get the metal part moving. Suddenly something rushed out and Billy reared back with a small, surprised cry.

Water. There was water coming out of the tap, running down the side of the tub and swirling out of an unplugged hole at the bottom of the bathtub.

How was this possible?

Billy turned to look back at the King who was smiling brightly. Teddy didn’t say anything, he just nodded at the second tap and Billy carefully grasped its handle, turning it more gently than the first one.

Water again poured out, but this time it steamed and with a shaking hand Billy reached forward, carefully bringing couple of his fingers to test the water.

It was hot. The water rushing out of the metal spout was hot, a bit too hot for washing, but when mixed with the water from the other tap the water would be deliciously warm.

“How?” Billy whispered and watched the water for a moment longer until he shut both of the streams of water.

“A little bit of creative engineering.” Teddy hummed and walked over to one of the mosaic covered walls, beckoning Billy closer. “Try it.” The King said as Billy walked closer, placing his hand against the wall. Billy followed suit and to his astonishment he found the wall warm.

“There are two cisterns of water on the other side of the wall.” Teddy said as he noticed Billy’s astonished expression. “One is full of cool water and the other - the one against this wall - is filled with water that is kept constantly warm by a fire. The smoke from it is channelled through a set of flues through the walls and under the floor, thus making this room wonderfully warm for comfortable bathing.”

Billy glanced down with an incredulous expression.

“I’m not pulling your leg.” Teddy grinned.

Billy squatted and realised the King’s words to be true; the floor was warm under touch.

“Who would come up with such an idea?” Billy muttered, the question more rhetorical than anything else.

“Not me.” Teddy grinned and they left the room.

The King’s bedchamber actually felt a tad cool after the lovely warmth of the bathing room.

“The room was thought up by one of Steve’s friends actually.” Teddy said as they settled on the sofa. “Lord Stark has always been somewhat of an inventor and he came across some designs and plans that were created during the reign of the Latium Empire.”

“Wasn’t that hundreds of years ago?” Billy asked as he settled against Teddy’s warm side.

“Yes. But copies of copies and so forth had survived to this day, and Lord Stark had managed to get his hands on some of them and asked if I were interested to have a proper Latium bath in my castle, and I though why not. Cost an arm and a leg, though.”

“Was it worth the marks?”

“Maybe we should ascertain that together.” Teddy murmured and pressed his face into Billy’s hair.

Billy stilled for a moment. He knew what Teddy meant and the idea of sharing a hot bath with him was so very enticing, but the idea of having to show his scars to the King was an uncomfortable one.

“I don’t think you would want to see me naked.” Billy whispered looking down at his lap.

“The scars you mean?” Teddy asked carefully to which Billy just nodded.

“I wish I could drive them away from you.” Teddy said tenderly. “Not because I think they are ugly, no. I’d banish them because I know that they bother and hurt you here,” Teddy placed his large hand on Billy’s back. “And here.” He slid the hand over Billy’s heart.

“Some fiends cannot be driven away with a sword.” Billy whispered. “Some of them are always with you here,” Billy brought his hand over Teddy’s heart, feeling the warmth of the other. “And up here.” He tapped the side of his head with his fingers.

Teddy didn’t say anything, he simply pulled the smaller man in a crushing embrace and Billy relished it. He just breathed in the King’s scent, drawing comfort from it.

“Thank you for showing me around the castle.” Billy murmured after a while. “You really have most impressive castle.”

“No, it’s not my castle, well, it is. But now it is more than that, it’s _our_ home.”

That word caused Billy’s mind to grind to a halt.

A home.

He had a home. Here with Teddy Billy had a home.

“I…” Billy whispered, tears welling in his eyes but he kept them shut. “I’ve never had a home before.”

“Oh Billy.” Teddy murmured and ran his broad hand in a soothing manner up and down Billy’s back.

“I never even imagined that… That I would have a place which I could call home, or that I could share it with someone. Actually,” Billy croaked. “Thi- this castle is not my home. You are, Teddy. I think you are my home.”

Teddy took Billy’s head between his hands and pulled their foreheads together. “And you are my home, my Billy.” Teddy said hoarsely and slid his hand down to grasp Billy’s chin, proceeding to place soft kiss on his lips. “Do you… Do you think we will be happy together?” The King asked, his breath mingling with Billy’s.

“We just have to see, don’t we?”

“I think we do.” Teddy murmured.

The tender moment was cut short when a knock on the door interrupted them.

“Dammit.” Teddy growled. “I’ll just tell them to leave.” He said and was about to call out when Billy stopped him.

“Don’t, you must have other things than just me to attend to.”

“I do.” Teddy grumbled almost in a pouty way. “But I just want to be with you.”

“You are the King.” Billy softly said and gently cupped Teddy’s cheek. “Your kingdom needs you.”

“Mhrmm.” Teddy growled. “Maybe I should make good of my threat and make Steve steward again, for life this time. Then I could just stay with you. But I suppose you are right.” He sighed and wiped away what remained of Billy’s tears with his thumb.

Teddy stood up, placed a kiss on Billy’s forehead, and instead of calling in the servant or whomever was behind the door, he himself walked over to the door to answer the knock. When Teddy opened the door there was a servant with a rolled parchment in his hand, bowing at this king.

“From the Lord Chancellor, sire.”

“Ah, excellent. Thank you.” Teddy nodded minutely and the servant backed away from the door with a polite bow.

Teddy returned to the sofa, sitting next to Billy and opening the rolled piece of parchment.

“What is it?”

“It’s…” Teddy’s eyes scanned the text quickly. “It’s the draft of the royal proclamation to summon the Estates and to convene the Diet. Do you want a look?” Teddy held out the parchment.

Billy nodded, taking the proclamation he started to read:

 

BY THE KING A PROCLAMATION FOR DECLARING THE CALLING OF A NEW DIET

 

Whereas We, by and with the advice of Our Privy Council, being desirous and resolved, as soon as may be, to meet Our People, and to have their Advice in Diet, do publish this, Our Royal Proclamation, and do hereby make known to all Our loving Subjects Our Royal Will and Pleasure to call a new Diet to be holden at Altburg on Monday the tenth day of October next: And We do hereby also, by this Our Royal Proclamation under Our Great Seal of Our Realm, require Writs to be issued by Our Chancellor of Löwe for causing the Lords Spiritual and Temporal, and Commons, who are to serve in the said Diet to give their Attendance in Our said Diet on the said date.

Given at Our Court at Altburg Castle, this twentieth day of September in the Year of our Lord one thousand four hundred and four and in the sixth year of Our Reign.

Theodore R.

GOD SAVE THE KING

 

The language was far more formal than anything Billy had ever read but he understood its contents. One thing however caught his interest and he glanced at Teddy when he finished reading the proclamation.

“Theodore R., is the R from your second name or…?”

“No.” Teddy laughed and took the parchment from Billy, rolling it up. “Well, it could be for one of my given names does start with the letter R. But actually it is short for king in Latin, as in _Theodore Rex_.”

Billy nodded, but then he frowned. “You have more than one given name?”

“I’ve never given you my full name, have I?” Teddy asked with a grin.

“No, not that I recall.”

“Well, would you like to hear it?” Smile on Teddy’s lips was almost teasing.

“Of course.”

Teddy cleared his throat. “Right, it’s Theodore Karl-Gustav Friedrich Erik Rufus Altman auf Skrull.”

Billy just stared at the King for a moment. “That’s a lot of names.” He finally said.

“It is.” Teddy laughed.

“Skrull…” Billy frowned. “It’s a village up north, is it not?”

Teddy nodded. “I suppose you are wondering why my name suggests that I’m from there.”

“Well, yes.”

“Edward I, the Unifier,” The King added. “He was from Skrull and my family’s seat was originally there. We were only a middle ranking noble family back then, not at the bottom of the ladder but neither in anyway part of the high nobility. But then things happened, the wheels of history turned in a most peculiar manner and Edward became king of the new Kingdom of Löwe and since then my family has been on the throne.”

“Altman… is Altburg named after your family?”

“No, it’s just a coincidence. I think Altburg is called Altburg because people are just lazy when naming places, so an old city which has been here for a long time came to be known as, well, old city.” Teddy shrugged. “You knew of Skrull, have you been there?”

“No.” Billy shook his head. “Johann and I visited a town nearby but we didn’t go to Skrull. Johann said that there was nothing there.”

“Well, he was right in that regard. It really is the arse-end of the world to be honest, though, it’s a pretty place. I’ve been there once when I was younger and my mother wanted me to see our ancestral seat.”

“Is it a large castle?” Billy asked.

“It’s barely a castle if truth be told.” Teddy shrugged. “It is more of a fortified manor house than anything else, really. Though, it is very homely and comfortable. My mother actually liked to retire there whenever she felt that the court life here in the capital was too much for her, and the size of the Skrull Castle was a perfect excuse for her not to drag half of the court with her.”

“You did not go with her?”

“No,” Teddy chuckled. “There was only that one instance. The life here in Altburg was far too appealing for a young lad like I was back then. Though,” Teddy’s voice gained a melancholic edge. “Now I wish that I would have gone with her. Sometimes I feel like I would give away my crown for the chance of seeing her one more time.”

Billy gently took Teddy’s big hands between his small ones and looked at the King, who smiled gratefully and in turn took Billy’s hands in his, guiding them to his lips and placing a soft kiss on them.

“The past is past.” Teddy said. “I can’t go back and undo things that have been, so I just have to draw happiness from the present. And you, my love, you make being happy very easy, so very easy indeed.”

“I could say the same thing.” Billy said as he gazed into Teddy’s blue eyes.

 

\- -

 

It had been three weeks since the Diet had been summoned and the day of the opening of the Diet was to be tomorrow. The heads of the delegations of each Estate, with the notable representatives from each of the said Estates had gathered to the unofficial preliminary meeting in the Great Hall.

Most of the delegates had arrived during the previous week or so, the nobility with show and pomp, pitching their lavish tents outside the city walls or renting houses from the local burgers who were always more than happy to ask exuberant rates from the nobles. And because to some of the more snobbish noblemen the mere idea of sleeping in a tent was a ghastly one, they willingly paid the extortion rates.

The inns and such as well were of course packed to the rafters with members of the Diet from all walks of society, lower nobility, priests, burghers and peasantry rubbing elbows and each of the Estates trying to find out how the other groups were going to vote. The city was absolutely bursting with people, and not just with the delegates. The opening of the Diet always attracted merchants and all sorts of people who thought that they could earn few extra marks from the visitors from far and wide. As a result of this surge of people Teddy had been forced to send one of the companies from the Royal Guards to live in tents so that their barracks could be transformed into temporary lodgings for the members of the peasant Estate who had been unable to find descend housing for themselves.

Not that there was anything new with this because the regularly held Diets as well caused similar problems with overcrowding,  but always once the first few days of the Diet had passed the novelty of it passed and rooms were freed when people left to seek new business opportunities somewhere else.

The foreman of the peasants had been immensely grateful for the King’s kind gesture and had bowed several times when Teddy had gone to meet him. As the King Teddy had noted that the lower on the rungs of the ladder of the society one was, more reverential people tended to be in regards of him. The peasantry and even burgers seemed to view him as some half divine creature in need of praising and Teddy usually tried to get the people to reign in their reverence by steering conversations to matters close to their hearts, whether it be farming, quality of wool, or the trade tariffs with neighbouring kingdoms. Many of them were often almost shocked that their king deigned to acknowledge them, let alone speak with them, but often when the shock and surprise of the first meeting had passed the Diet members from the lower estates were more than happy to talk candidly about matters concerning them.

When Teddy’s very informative conversation with the foreman had ended he had had the unfortunate chance of meeting one of the representatives of the nobility, a young nobleman by the name of Rollins.

Almost from the start of the conversation Teddy had begun to dislike the man immensely. Lord Rollins seemed to encapsulate everything Teddy loathed about the nobility. He was haughty and condescending towards people he viewed to be under him, scoffing at things said by nearby burghers, and in turn with the nobles above him he was a sycophantic brownnose. And with Teddy he constantly had on his face this awful, smarmy smile, and after barely five minutes of conversation with the King he was talking in a manner that suggested that they were fast friends rather than the brief acquaintances.

Teddy sighed and tried to will away the beginnings of a headache that was creeping up the back of his skull. Lord Rollins was still droning on and on about how he had won some minor joust, making it seem like he had beaten an entire army, rather than an unimportant provincial competition.

The only thing Teddy wanted to do was to tell them man to shut up and bugger off with his awful boasting and irritating grin, but the situation meant that he had to show some restraint. One, even if one was the King, could not tell a Diet representative to simply piss off, no matter how ghastly the man in question was.

“Sire.” Teddy jolted back to the present from his musings and to his relief he found George addressing him. “If I may, I have some matters that need your attendance.”

“Of course, Lord Chancellor.” Teddy almost sighed in relief and turned to Lord Rollins, schooling his face to a small, faux apologetic smile.

Rollins was already bowing in a frankly ridiculous show of reverence, nearly doubling over.

“Your Majesty.” Rollins said with a voice dripping in honey. “I wish you the best and know that whatever is the matter in need of your attendance your keen intellect will surely resolve it in a way most beneficial to Löwe and us all.”

Teddy wanted to roll his eyes but refrained from doing so, instead he gave the obsequious lord a small nod. “Lord Rollins.” Teddy said and turned, heading towards George who was standing nearby.

“Thank you.” Teddy sighed when Rollins was out of earshot.

George laughed quietly and glanced at Lord Rollins who was already toadying to some unfortunate member of the high nobility.

“Lord Rollins is somewhat… much.” George hummed.

“You mean the man is full of himself while also somehow managing to be an absolute sycophant.”

“Well…” George glanced at the man in question and huffed. “I suppose you are right, sire. If someone was to say to me that Lord Rollins is an arrogant prick, well, then… I would not argue against that kind of a character definition.”

Teddy smiled at his adjutant’s rare outburst. George was known as a man of who was not easily rankled by something or someone, but clearly Rollins had managed to do so, gotten under the skin of the calm and collected Lord Chancellor.

“Why, George,” Teddy grinned. “It seems that our estimable member of the Diet has done something to irritate you.”

“That little toad had the gall to march into my office earlier today and demand that I go and order a house in the city to be cleared for him, for me to send the guards to temporarily evict a merchant from his house so that our little Lord Rollins would not have to sleep in a tent.”

Teddy just looked at his adjutant incredulously.

“I nearly told the little prick to go f-” George’s mouth snapped shut when he realised what he was saying. “I do apologise, sire. What I’m saying is very unbecoming for a gentleman and for the servant of the Crown.”

“Don’t apologise.” Teddy made a small laugh. “What you are saying is quite true. The man is indeed a prick, a toad’s prick; small, slimy, and insignificant.”

George barked a laugh, but then schooled his face back into something more suitable for a Crown’s senior official. He then glanced over Teddy’s shoulder and then turned to the King.

“The foreman and the senior members of the burghers’ delegation are there, sire, they wished to have a word with you before we end this gathering. Would now be a good time for it?”

“Why not. Though, do tell me, do I pass the muster? Am I regal enough to meet the venerable gentlemen representing the moneyed interests of our fair Kingdom?” Teddy spread out his arms slightly.

“You are dashing in your regal splendour, sire.” George said with a level expression. “Though, you seem to have forgotten your belt, but I don’t think anyone is going to hold that against you.”

Teddy glanced down and he had indeed forgotten his belt.

“Oh, bugger.” Teddy frowned.

“You must have been distracted by something, sire.” George said with a knowing smile.

Teddy cleared his throat and glanced at his aide with a small grin. He had indeed been distracted by something; that distraction having been a certain dark-haired young man with beautiful amber brown eyes and soft lips.

Billy and he had been lying on the sofa right to the moment it had been absolutely necessary for Teddy to leave for the meeting in the Great Hall. He had been on his back, head propped on a pillow with Billy lying on top of him with his head tucked under his chin; a position that had at some point become their most usual one to lie in. Often they spent countless moments in soft embrace, Teddy gently running his hands along Billy’s body and the smaller man just making soft, happy noises whenever the King would press a kiss amongst his raven hair.

Teddy would have been more than content to just stay in his bedchamber for the rest of his life and leave the whole business of ruling in George’s capable hands, but he was the King after all. So he had had to leave his love dozing on the sofa but if he had lingered, pressing small kisses on Billy’s brow and in so doing had forgotten his belt then so be it.

“At least I remembered to grab my crown.” Teddy said and plinked the crown with his forefinger. “And who knows, perhaps I will start a new fashion style amongst the nobility.” He continued “Tomorrow half of the nobility will be without belts just because I am without one.” George just huffed in an amused manner.

Suddenly a soft voice called out; “Teddy.”

Billy’s voice reached the King’s ears and he was helpless to prevent himself from breaking into a wide, happy smile.

It was still such a wonderful feeling to have, to hear Billy’s gentle voice saying his name and then be filled to the brim with elation. For the past three weeks he had gone about his life with a silly, jubilant grin on his face and Teddy was quite convinced that he would do so for the rest of his life. Maybe they would add an epithet after his name once he was dead; Theodore III, the King in love.

Just as he was about to turn to meet his love, a sharp sound of a slap and a hurt yelp broke his moment of soft contemplation.

Teddy frowned and was about to ask from his aide what the noise was but then he saw how George had gone pale and how his eyes were full of shock and hesitation, looking at something over Teddy’s shoulder. The King whipped around, and he could barely fathom the sight in front of him.

Nearby Billy was standing stock still, Teddy’s forgotten belt loosely hanging from his right hand while the left one was shielding his left cheek. Billy was looking with shock and fear at the figure before him; he looked frightened, with tears in his eyes as Lord Rollins stood in front of him, the lord’s hand still slightly raised.

Teddy heard blood rushing in his ears and a wave of heat coursed through him. He could hear barely anything over the roaring in his ears, but then over his shock he heard Lord Rollins speaking, caught his words to Billy.

“That is not how you address your king.” Rollins said with a haughty, almost bored voice. “King Theodore is your superior and as a servant you will address him with due deference. He is not ‘King Teddy’ to you, even though you might call him that with your servant friends when people better than you are not around. He is ‘sire’ or ‘Your Majesty’ to you, you filthy little thing.”

Billy simply stared at the man in front of him, almost as if he did not understand where he was.

“Well, speak up, what do you have to say for yourself?” Lord Rollins huffed in an arrogant manner. “Are you mute or just stupid, _boy_? Do I need to slap you a second time to get some sense in to you?” The lord sneered and raised his hand again.

Billy flinched as Rollins prepared for another strike and that was the thing that pushed Teddy over the edge.

A side of him he had always tried to contain, tried to keep down and prevent it from showing was now fully there, roaring in his ears. It was the hungry, violent, brutal side of him that he had never allowed to surface, a side of him that had always been whispering to him that he was too soft, too lenient for releasing caught rebels or showing mercy to people. It was the side of him he had always feared and kept in check because that _other_ Teddy would have been a force too terrible to be reckoned with if let loose. But now he didn’t want to hold it back, he wanted that monster to be free to deal its cruel vengeance.

Teddy clenched his fists as something cold and hard settled over him, he felt it coursing through his veins as it replaced the burning fury with something infinitely more dangerous, settling inside him like a piece of ice. It felt… Good, Teddy realised, the feeling of utter rage and hatred felt _good_.

Teddy knew that if his face was not stuck to a cold, expressionless scowl he would have been grinning viciously. For once he would and could hurt someone and do it with glee. He was going to rip Rollins to little pieces and no one would stop him.

“Sire…” George said pleadingly, his voice desperate, but it was for nought. No amount of reasoning was going to spare Rollins from his fate.

Teddy took few hard strides towards the lord who was still facing away from him and the people who had been watching the scene in front of them. The onlookers took hurried steps back with expressions of fear as their king stalked towards Rollins.

Teddy slammed all of his considerable bulk against Lord Rollins like a charging ox and pinned him against a nearby column. Teddy wrapped his hand around Rollins’ throat and effortlessly lifted him off the floor, leaving the lord’s legs dangling in the air as they desperately looked for any purchase.

There was an expression of fear and shock on the lord’s face as Teddy’s squeezed, cutting off the man’s air supply. Rollins’ one hand wrapped around the King’s thick forearm as he tried to get free, while the fingers of his other hand tried to force Teddy’s unyielding grip around his throat to loosen. Teddy just used his free hand to force the desperately twitching fingers away.

The feeble attempts to get free only spurred Teddy on and he tightened his steely grip, his face contorting into a terrible expression of wrath.

“How…” Teddy said with a deep growl. “Dare you? How the fuck _dare_ you!?” Teddy snarled. “No one,” Teddy bellowed. “No one hurts people under my protection whether they be servants or royalty or something in between.”

Rollins did not reply; he could not.

“Do you worthless bastard think that you can just march in and assault my people, _my_ Billy, and lay your disgusting hands on people I care about? Hmm?”

Lord Rollins was turning red and his struggling was becoming even more frantic.

Teddy simply laughed.

It was a cruel and vicious chuckle and the King’s mouth curled into a menacing grin, his eyes almost dark and without mercy.

“Struggle all you want, you little shit. You’re going to die here and I will watch as the light fades in your eyes.”

The King held the man in his chokehold and after a while Rollins’ eyes were starting to droop and Teddy gave him a vicious slap.

“Not yet. I want to see it, the moment when you realise that you are dying because of your arrogance, and because,” Teddy leaned closer. “No one,” His voice went low and icy cold in its flint like hardness, the cruel smile on his face was even more terrifying and his eyes so full of rage that they were now completely dark. “No one. Hurts. _My_ Billy.”

Teddy could feel how Lord Rollins’ kicking legs were starting to still and how his grasp on the arm holding him up grew weaker and weaker. His lips were starting to turn purplish and Teddy could feel his whole body growing laxer and laxer by the second. He could feel it, Teddy could sense how the consciousness of the man in his grip was slipping and how his body was ever so slowly creeping towards death.

It made him happy in an awful, merciless way. Teddy was feeling almost elated to get his revenge, to avenge Billy.

“Teddy, please… Don’t do it, please.” A voice said and a hand was placed on his chest.

Teddy’s head whipped around to look at the person speaking.

Who the hell _dared_ to try to come between him and his rightful vengeance?

A pair of pleading, desperate, frightened eyes were looking up at Teddy and a hand was placed on his arm holding Rollins up.

 

_Billy_.

 

“Just let him go, please.” Billy was pleading with a quiet voice, his hands desperately clinging to Teddy’s tunic.

“Please…”

It wasn’t the way Billy uttered his plea, nor was it his hands on Teddy that made the King relinquish his hold on the man he wanted to end. No, it was the way Billy was looking at him, looking at Teddy with almost _fear_.

Suddenly Teddy was almost back to his normal self, he felt most of his rage dampened by the cold shock of realising that his love had been watching him with fear in his eyes and the King let go of Rollins. The man fell to the floor, wheezing and gagging as he gulped down air, shuddering with every inhale but Teddy could not care less about the prone figure at his feet, he was completely focused at the man standing next to him, eyes locked with Billy’s.

His cheek was still reddened by the slap but his eyes were dry, the fear of Rollins had been replaced by something so horrible that Teddy wanted to be sick; it was fear towards him and Teddy wanted to fall on his knees and beg forgiveness.

Instead of that he slowly gazed around the hall, taking in the shocked and stunned expressions of the Diet members, not that their thoughts of him were a concern for him in any way or form. Teddy finally noticed George among the people and he beckoned the older man closer, and the adjutant took hesitant steps closer, the expression on his face so unlike anything Teddy had ever seen.

Teddy wanted to explain himself but the Great Hall was not the right place for it, instead he slowly placed his hand on Billy’s back and guided the smaller man towards George. The fact that Billy still allowed him to touch made him feel ever so slightly better, but not by much.

“Lord Chancellor,” Teddy began with a low, subdued voice. “Would you… take William to… to…”

“Of course, sire.” George said quietly and held out his arm towards the doors leading away from the hall. “Shall we, master William?”

“I… Yes, thank you, Lord Chancellor.” Billy said, the fear in his eyes was gone but there was a lot of hesitance and worry remaining.

Teddy watched as the pair left and he was glad to see that George placed his hand on Billy’s shoulder in an almost paternal manner. When they left the hall, a silence fell over the Great Hall despite the fact that there was about two dozen or so people still in the hall, the only noticeable sound was the wheezing breathing of Lord Rollins as he sat on the floor, leaning against the stone pillar gathering his breath.

The rage in Teddy was seeping back in but now he could contain it, he would not have to lay his hands on Rollins to make him pay.

“On your knees, you cur.” Teddy growled as he once again loomed over Rollins and the lord scrambled into the ordered position, trembling as his King looked down at him with a cool hatred.

“Laying one’s hand on a member of the royal household or the Crown’s official is an act of rebellion.” Teddy said with a cold, threatening voice as he peered down at Rollins. “Are you harbouring rebellious thoughts, _Lord Rollins_? Was it your intention to harm our royal self, our rule?”

Teddy rarely spoke of himself in the third person but now was the perfect moment for it.

“Do you share sympathies with Lord Norris’ cause?”

What little remained of the redness on Rollins’ face was gone when he blanched at the King’s words.

“No, sire. No, I’m not a rebel, I would never oppose you.” Rollins whispered and looked at the King, but he lowered his gaze as he saw his ruler’s eyes.

“Is that so,” Teddy said lowly. “You say so, but your actions speak otherwise, Lord Rollins. You see, we feel that you intended to harm us by hurting our beloved subject William.”

“I- I-” Rollins stammered. “He… He addressed you in an ill-mannered way and I thought that I should… Should correct him.” The man whispered.

“So…” Teddy drawled venomously. “Instead of having treacherous thoughts you think us so weak that we cannot defend our honour by ourselves, is that what you mean?”

“No, sire.” The kneeling figure whispered in a horrified manner and shuddered.

Teddy watched at the man for a moment, relishing how the man trembled and squirmed under his pinning gaze. After a while though he leaned down and yanked the lord’s chin up, his fingers gripping tightly Rollins’ jaw bone.

“We would have gladly killed you.” The King said quietly enough that only Rollins heard his words. “The only reason why you still breathe is that William stopped us from throttling you, remember that. And also remember that if he changes his mind we will gladly hunt you down and with great pleasure rip you to pieces with our own bare hands.”

Rollins could not speak so he just nodded, not that Teddy’s steely grip allowed much movement in that regard.

“You will not participate to this Diet, Rollins.” Teddy spoke, still keeping his voice so low that only the lord heard it. “Technically we cannot order you to remove yourself, but you _will_ not take part to this Diet. You will come up with some excuse and remove yourself from the position of a Diet member, you will ask for a replacement and leave Altburg altogether. And we do not suffer to see you in this city or in our court for a very long time.”

Again Rollins feebly tried to nod.

“Do you understand?” This time Teddy said it loud enough that people still watching heard it.

“Yes, sire.” Lord Rollins said hoarsely.

“No, Lord Rollins.” Teddy growled and let go of Rollins’ jaw, holding out his right arm. “Yes, _what_?”

“Yes, Your Majesty.” The kneeling man said and carefully reached up to place a kiss on The King’s ring.

“Leave.” Teddy said gruffly with utter contempt and watched as Rollins slowly stood up, taking few backward steps with bows away from the King and hobbled out after. Teddy would have gladly made him crawl out of the Great Hall, but he just wanted the man to be gone as soon as possible.

When Rollins was finally out of the hall Teddy gave a quick glance towards the people who still remained in the hall. Their expressions ranged from the tightly concealed expressions of shock of the nobility, to the open astonishment of some of the peasantry and everything between.

The King regarded the silent group for a moment until he broke the silence. “Ladies, gentlemen.” He acknowledged them with a small nod and the delegates bowed in reply and the King left.

Before Teddy even realised it he was already standing outside his own bedchamber, leaning against the door for a moment, utterly lost for words. He had no idea what Billy would say, would he hate him, be scared of him, would he want to… leave? Teddy was utterly lost for words.

After a moment, though, Teddy just stepped into the room and found his lover sitting on the edge of their large bed still clutching the belt, raising his eyes as the King entered the room.

Teddy stayed near the door and just stared at Billy for a moment, then taking few hesitant steps closer to the bed.

“May I… May I come closer?” The King asked quietly as he stood near the bed.

“Of course.” Billy said softly.

“I’m sorry, Billy. Forgive me, please.” Teddy whispered brokenly as he got in front of Billy and he proceeded to kneel in front of him, carefully placing his hands on Billy’s knees. He did not pull back, of which Teddy was glad.

“I’m sorry that I- I made you scared of me. I would never, Billy, never hurt you. Please believe me.” Teddy pleaded hoarsely and lowered his gaze away from Billy’s eyes.

“Teddy…” Billy said gently and took the King’s head between his hands, lifting his chin up so that their eyes could again meet. “I wasn’t afraid of you hurting me, I feared that you would kill that man and I’m not worth it.”

“Yes you are.” Teddy said desperately, sliding his hands up Billy’s thighs to cradle his hips and pressing his face against the smaller man’s midriff.

“Perhaps so.” Billy muttered and placed a kiss amongst Teddy’s hair. “But you don’t have to kill someone to protect me and thus stop being a good man because of it.”

“I’m not a good man.” Teddy said into Billy’s chest and he could feel him stilling. “I’ve killed people, Billy, so many people. I have killed them with my sword and with my bare hands. I have ordered troops to battle and in doing so caused hundreds, thousands of deaths. Men have died because of my orders and I have so much blood in my hands that it will never wash away, never. So when you say that I’m a good man then you are wrong, but I have one good thing in my life, one person in my life who I know to be good and I will defend him, _you_ , with all of my might.”

“Did you enjoy it, the fighting and the bloodshed?” Billy asked, and Teddy raised his eyes.

“Of course not. I abhorred it, still do. It made me sick.” Teddy croaked as he looked into Billy’s brown eyes. “I did it all, but I always found it horrible. All of those poor people who died because of my orders, my own men, Norris’ men. Boys younger than you and old men who should have had the chance of living in peace for the remainders of their years dying on the field, or crying in agony with uncurable wounds… I gave orders that sent thousands of men to their deaths in the hands of their brothers.”

The King was quiet for a moment.

“I’m not a good man.” Teddy again murmured into Billy’s waist.

Gentle fingers started to card through Teddy’s hair and Teddy slipped his arms around Billy, holding on to him firmly.

“Would someone who was not good take in an estateless pauper, and be kind and gentle to that pauper, would that someone show mercy and leniency to people whom he could rightly hang, would that someone treat people below him with respect and kindness from the lowliest of stable boys to his closest advisors, would that someone be so loved by his people that he is practically unerring in their eyes.”

Billy leaned down placed a soft kiss amongst the King’s blond hair.

“A man who isn’t good could not be like that, but you are like that; you are kind, you are gentle, you are just, and you are loved. You are loved by your people, Teddy, you are King Teddy to them, not His Majesty Theodore III. Most importantly however you are loved by one William With-No-Name, an estateless pauper who thinks you to be good and who loves you so much that his heart aches.” Billy whispered with tenderness.

Teddy felt tears in his eyes spilling over and he softly quacked from subdued sobs as he pressed against Billy, crushing him into a desperate embrace as clung to him.

Teddy did not deserve the absolution given to him, but he gladly took it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Protective Teddy makes a comeback with vengeance and almost becomes Murder Teddy…
> 
> Would Teddy go that far? Who knows?
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I do realise that like the previous one, this one as well ended with someone crying. The feels, the feels!
> 
> About how I imagine things in this chapter looking, George is wearing a livery collar, not a dog collar. If someone was wondering how it looks, it is something like this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Livery_collar#/media/File:Hans_Holbein,_the_Younger_-_Sir_Thomas_More_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg
> 
> The coronation crown looks a lot like the Imperial Crown of the Holy Roman Empire. So like this, but without the cross and the hoop at the top: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imperial_Crown_of_the_Holy_Roman_Empire#/media/File:Holy_Roman_Empire_Crown_(Imperial_Treasury)2.jpg
> 
> The style of the crown’s jewels in which the jewels are polished rather than cut is because at the time when the crown was made the knowledge of how to cut gemstones did not exist. This style is called cabochon and it was the favoured style of the Franks for example. I personally relish how hideous the style is!
> 
> Also, we now have a big, giant bathtub at our disposal… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLRZ0dIvwHY
> 
> As always, do leave a comment if you have questions or you just want to chat.


	7. Chapter 7

///\\\\\

 

The day of the opening of the Diet had come, and Billy watched as the King’s personal servants helped their ruler to put on the heavy looking robes that were more ornate and magnificent than anything Teddy had previously worn. The retainers worked quietly and efficiently, occasionally asking if the points they were tying were too tight or loose; the King just shaking his head or nodding in reply, and when the outfit was finally fully on the King’s person he smiled and with a couple of kind words to the servants he dismissed them. They bowed before turning, and left their sovereign and his lover by themselves.

“So,” Teddy turned to Billy and grinned. “Do I pass the muster?”

“Very much so.” Billy smiled and took a step closer. “You look very handsome, though, you would look handsome even in a burlap sack.”

“Burlap sack you say.” Teddy smiled affectionately. “Wouldn’t that be a little bit revealing?”

“It would be,” Billy shrugged and closed the distance between them, burrowing against the blond’s broad chest. “But I would not mind it.”

“I’m sure you would not.” Teddy barked a laugh and tucked Billy’s head under his jaw, holding him close.

“Teddy.” Billy murmured into the King’s chest.

“Mhmm.”

“It feels as if you are wearing half the Kingdom’s cloth on you.”

Teddy again just laughed and pressed a kiss amongst Billy’s dark hair.

“The Robe of State is a rather heavy piece of clothing, well, a set of clothes, I must admit.” The King murmured into Billy’s hair and rolled his shoulders. “And damn uncomfortable if I’m being completely honest. Luckily I don’t have to wear it that often, only during the opening and closing ceremonies of the Diet.”

Billy slipped his arms around Teddy and ran his palms up the King’s broad back and hugged him tightly, breathing in contently.

“Could you help me a bit?” Teddy asked after a while and let go.

“Yes of course.”

“That box on the table,” Teddy pointed towards a wooden chest on the table and Billy walked over to it. “The collar inside; would you do the honours and help me get it on.”

Billy opened the box’s lid and took out the heavy looking piece of jewellery. It was similar to the chain of office George wore, but the King’s collar was made of much more substantial amount of gold, making it a lot heavier. The badge was also much more ornate than any other badge on the collars of officials Billy had seen so far. It was the Kingdom’s coat of arms in jewellery form: There on a field of green was a crowned lion rampant, the right forepaw replaced with an armoured hand brandishing a sword, trampling on a sabre with the hind-paws, the lion was crowned and armed, the weapons hilted and the armour garnished in gold, the blades and the armour in silver.

Billy studied the chain for a moment and then ever so carefully picked up the collar, and was still surprised by its weight.

“It weighs a ton.” Billy said and walked back to Teddy who had sat down, looking uncomfortable in the formal robes.

“I know.” Teddy sighed wearily and tilted his head down just a bit; “I usually feel the burden of kingship more in a metaphorical fashion, but sometimes, like today, I feel it physically as well.”

Teddy lowered his gaze and leaned his body forward a bit; allowing Billy to slip the heavy chain on the King’s shoulders. Even when sitting the King was as tall as Billy standing and Teddy’s height was one of the things he relished, as it meant that he could tuck himself snuggle against the King and be surrounded by his warmth. Billy adjusted the collar just so and the badge settled somewhere near Teddy’s sternum. The blond pulled the smaller man closer and buried his face against Billy’s chest, breathing deeply.

“Thank you.”

“I’m happy to help.” Billy said softly and carded his fingers through Teddy’s golden hair.

“No, I mean…” Teddy exhaled deeply. “Thank you for being here, for being with me.”

“Of course I’m with you, Teddy. It’s an important day for you and I wa-”

“No.” Teddy cut him off. “Thank you for being _with_ me.”

The King lifted his gaze and Billy could see that his eyes glistened, he wasn’t crying but he wasn’t far from doing so.

“Oh.” Billy breathed out shakily and gazed into Teddy’s blue eyes.

“I…” Teddy said quietly, swallowing thickly and clearing his throat. “Before I found you I was so alone, Billy. I was so bloody alone and I just… Thank you for being with me, Billy. Thank you for loving me.”

“Don’t thank me.” Billy softly murmured. “Love is not a thing that people should thank one another for. It is not a thing that can just be handed out like bread, or even kindness. Love is… Love is more than that, and if I didn’t love you, I could not make myself love you even if I wanted to. But I love you, Teddy. I love you with all of my heart and I will continue to love you no matter what.”

“As will I.” Teddy said quietly and held Billy firmly, he was quiet for a moment but finally spoke. “Billy… I… About the yesterday…”

“Teddy… You don’t have to say that you are sorry any more times.” Billy said gently and ran his fingers through the golden strands of his lover.

“It’s not that, well,” The King shrugged minutely. “It is that as well. I will never forgive myself for making you afraid, but I need you to understand why I did what I did.”

Billy didn’t interrupt Teddy; he simply continued his gentle ministrations.

“You…” Teddy swallowed thickly. “I don’t think you even now realise how much I love and care for you, how much I need you, Billy. There is not another person in this kingdom to whose assault I would have reacted the way I did. There are not many people in my life who I would consider to be close to me. There are only really Steve and George, and perhaps to some extent Sir James as I consider him to be almost family because he is Steve’s best friend. But even if that vile wretch Rollins had laid his hands on any one of them I wouldn’t have reacted the way I did. I… I would not have done _that_.”

Billy’s hands had slid down to stay on Teddy’s shoulders and he kept them there, still silent to allow the King to say what he needed to say.

“Even in war,” He continued quietly. “Even there amidst fighting, in battle while knee-deep in blood, mud, and shit I never even for a moment allowed that side of me to surface. But… There were moments, after the battles, these little fleeting moments when I came close to breaking after hearing of our losses, after seeing so many of my men dead or dying. I wanted it Billy,”

Teddy’s voice had grown distant and Billy could feel the tension in the King’s shoulders as he gazed into those blue eyes that were quite not looking into his.

“I wanted to march to our prisoners and rip one of them apart. I just wanted to take someone, anyone, and tear them to pieces with my bare hands simply because I could have. I never did however; I always managed to stop myself. But still… I wanted to hurt them and… and the worst part of it is that… I thi- I think that I would have enjoyed it.”

“Did you feel like that yesterday, did it feel good when you yesterday…” Billy’s words petered out.

“Yes.” Teddy said hoarsely. “Wha- What does it say about me, that I felt like that? That I did that, that I hurt someone, that… That I almost killed him?”

“It means that,” Billy said quietly deliberating his answer for a moment. “It means that you are a human being. No one, absolutely no one can remain in full control of themselves for their entire life. You and I, we all have our breaking points. I…” Billy took a tremulous breath. “I was broken by Norris after a while.”

“Billy…” Teddy whispered and held him tightly.

“I resisted him at the start. I swore I wouldn’t make it easy for him. I kicked and screamed but then I stopped. After a while, after the beatings and hunger I…” Billy swallowed thickly. “I just allowed him to do what he willed and just took it, but still cursed him in my mind, wished him a long, painful death. But then after weeks and months I ju- just broke. I had no wherewithal in me to resist, and I just became a thing, Norris’ plaything.”

Billy remained quiet for a moment and tried to keep his voice from stammering too much.

“Sometimes, not often but sometimes, after he had fucked me he would… He would hold me close and pet me, he’d tell me what good little whore I was, how good my hole was, how he so very much cherished his little pet, and I,” Billy said chokingly and closed his eyes. “I actually was grateful, for these short, fleeting moments I was grateful for his gentle petting and praises because it was the only kind of touching that didn’t hurt me.”

Billy’s fingers were digging themselves into Teddy’s shoulders.

“I’m veering off topic.” Billy said gruffly and cleared his throat. “What I mean is that… We all eventually break in some way or form and that’s normal, even for a king. You have so much on your shoulders, Teddy, more than I can ever comprehend and the fact that despite all of that you haven’t stopped being a good man just tells how strong you are. I wish I had your strength.”

“You are strong, Billy, stronger than you know. I can see it.” Teddy said hoarsely and slid his palms to rest on Billy’s hips, looking up at the smaller man.

“It’s your strength that you see.” Billy said quietly. “Sometimes I feel that the only thing keeping me whole is your strength and love.”

“You are underestimating yourself.”

“Perhaps, but you have no idea what your closeness means to me. With you I feel less… Less cracked, less tarnished.”

“You are not tarnished.” Teddy said seriously.       

Billy just smiled sadly and pressed his forehead against Teddy’s. Climbing on his lap and wrapping his arms around the King’s neck Billy hid his face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in. Teddy even now didn’t know all of what had been done to him, and Billy wasn’t going to tell to him just now, but when he finally would, he hoped that the King would still bear to touch him.

“Shouldn’t you be going?” Billy said after a while. “I’m sure there are people waiting for you.”

“I’m the king.” Teddy murmured. “The Diet will wait as long as I wish.”

There was a knock on the door and the King sighed deeply. Billy stood up and placed a kiss amongst Teddy’s golden hair, pulling the King on his feet.

“Duty calls.” Billy said softly.

“Unfortunately.” The blond sighed again and walked over to his desk and from an elaborate wooden chest took out a crown, placing it on his head. It wasn’t as overbearing as the coronation crown, but it was much more bejewelled and ornate than the King’s everyday crown.

“Once more unto the breach.” Teddy said and gave a small, wry and slightly weary grin. “Let’s go.” He said and grabbed Billy’s hand. “If you wish to come and see the opening that is?”

“Of course I want to.” Billy said as they left the King’s study and walked past the guards in attention and the servant that had reminded them with his knock. “How long will it take?”

“The opening itself does not last that long.” Teddy hummed. “Only about an hour or so. The Diet itself, the deliberations and discussions and all the dry and boring parts, that usually lasts for two or three months. But as this is an extraordinary Diet with only few matters to discuss and only one very important topic, the reduction of the Marcher Lords’ rights, it will be over much sooner; two or three weeks hopefully. Though of course there is the matter of the captured rebels, but the Court of Realm should have that sorted out in a weeks’ time. So… I’m hoping that a month from now all of this is behind us and that I can focus on much more important matters.”

“What are those?” Billy asked as they neared the Great Hall where the Diet was gathering.

“Well…” Teddy grinned as they stopped near a small door that Billy had never really noticed. “I’m going to spoil you rotten and we are going to have some time just for us.”

“Is that so?” Billy smiled and brushed a non-existent piece of dust from the King’s shoulder. “Well, I suppose I’ll see what you will come up in a months’ time.”

Teddy just leaned down and placed a kiss on the raven haired man’s lips, not worried about the guards nearby seeing his gentle expression.

“There are a set of steps behind that door that lead up to the triforium.” Teddy said as he pulled back from the kiss. “It’s a bit dusty up there but it’s by far the best place to view the ceremony, you can get right above the dais and see and hear everything.”

“See you in an hour.” Billy said as he turned and pulled open the door to reveal a narrow spiral staircase.

“I’m counting the minutes.” Teddy called after him and Billy smiled.

As Billy climbed the stairs he noticed that the King had been right when warning about the dustiness; Billy had to brush a decent amount of grey dust from his clothes when he reached the top of the stairs and the small door waiting there.

Billy pushed it open and if he would have suffered from vertigo he would have immediately retreated back into the narrow stairwell.

The narrow triforium level ran all around the Great Hall with countless columns hiding the narrow walkway behind them as the passage stretched around the entire space. The narrowness would have been unpleasant if not for the fact that the passage was about thirty feet above the Hall’s floor, making the people down look small like children’s dolls. There was not any kind of proper bannister between Billy and the drop, only wrought iron metal bars set waist high between the columns serving as some kind of a safety feature. He took a step closer to the edge and gingerly peered over the edge, testing the sturdiness of the railing by tugging it few times. The metal rod didn’t budge and Billy dared to lean further to see the Great Hall properly from his high berth.

The Hall had gone through a transformation. Gone were the large candleholders that normally stood in every other space between the thick columns and gone was the feeling of openness that Billy had started to associate to the Great Hall. The large space was teeming with people; the space from the massive main doors to about a third of the way to the dais was a sea of people dressed in various ways and forms. Some were clearly nobility, clad in their silk, velvet and jewellery; others were clearly peasantry with their sensible and utilitarian wool clothes, and the rest of the gathered folk in the hall were between these too ends of the social ladder.

The crowd was bisected in two by lines of guards with halberds, their backs towards the crowd, forming a passage right at the centre of the Hall. Teddy would probably walk down it and towards the throne Billy guessed and moved closer to the dais. As he walked along the high gallery he realised that two stands had been built near the dais; one on each side of the Hall, placed opposite of each other with some tables in the space between the ends of the stands and the dais. There were people clad in dark, formal robes sitting at the tables with heaps of parchment rolls, quills and inkwells, and books in front of them, busily preparing to keep minutes. There were also extra seats on the dais besides the throne itself, meant for the highest officials of the King and other important people, though Billy noticed that the throne itself had been raised above the other seats with an added platform under it.

The favoured colour in the Great Hall seemed to be green and the sides of the stands were covered in dark green velvet, as were the scribes’ tables and the long seats for the representatives as well. Flags hung between the columns and above the throne a large cloth depicting the royal coat of arms hung, the gold thread of the lion’s mane gleaming in the sunlight that fell from the high set windows above the triforium.

As Billy made his way right up to the dais he could see how the people were organised on the stands. Closest to the King’s right was the nobility in their magnificent robes, next to them sat the clergy in their black vestments. The lower Estates sat next to each other on the other side of the Hall, the peasantry - surprisingly - closer to the King and the burghers further away.

Billy was right above the upper Estates, staring down at the peers and the princes of the church,  but he could not hear what they were saying, the general hubbub and the echoing of voices mingled in such a manner that one could not focus on a single person’s voice.

“Master William.” A husky voice suddenly said and Billy almost jumped out of his skin and whipped around to see who had spoken.

It was Sir James who had somehow silently managed to walk up to Billy without him even realising it.

“Good day to you, Sir James.” Billy managed to say and bowed deep. Too deep perhaps considering that he did have some sort of a standing in the court as the King’s lover, even though it wasn’t an official one. Old habits however died hard, and Billy had had been flicked about his ears so many times for not showing enough respect for his superiors that it was ingrained in him not to take any chances with shows of deference.

“No need for that.” Sir James replied and Billy dared to look up at the tall brunette.

Billy had not seen Prince Steven’s adjutant since their first encounter the day when he had arrived to Altburg with Teddy. Sir James had left with his liege the following day, but now he was back, probably due to the Diet.

Sir James was in his early thirties, like Prince Steven, but that was where the similarities with the Prince ended. He was of similar build and height with the King, broad shouldered and tall, body stacked with muscle and bound in very apparent strength. He seemed to also favour dark clothing, though not the kind a nobleman would normally wear. Sir James’ clothes were very utilitarian and plain, clothes that would not in any way hinder his movements if need be; soldier’s clothes.

That combined with his hair that brushed his shoulders, with the strong jaw with a cleft and couple of days’ worth of stubble, and he made a handsome and imposing figure. He seemed the sort of fellow who could get any woman or man by simply looking at them with his piercing eyes that could almost be described as bedroom eyes, if not for the fact that the look in them was more predatory than come-hither.

Billy somehow felt like he was being dissected into little strands when the Knight’s steely-blue eyes looked at him, for where Teddy’s blue eyes were like the soft hue of a cornflower and full of warmth and kindness, Sir James’ were like sea ice in January; cold and hard. Though, they were not unkind per se, more like extremely observant, full of constant vigilance, which, Billy supposed, was reasonably understandable when considering that he was Prince Steven’s bodyguard also.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you, Sir James.” Billy said and tried to smile, but he felt like a naughty boy who had been caught doing something wrong, and this despite the fact that he had not been doing anything forbidden.

“I try to move quietly.” Sir James said, his voice low, almost gravelly. A far cry from his liege’s and king’s soft and deep ones, but very attractive in its dark low timbre. “It is best not to give a possible enemy any hints of one’s approach. Makes it easier if you need to dispatch them.”

“Oh.” Billy squeaked and it was only then that he noticed the scabbard hanging off the Knight’s belt, and more importantly the hilt of a sword sticking out of it.

“Don’t worry.” The brunette chuckled as he noticed Billy’s ashen expression. “I just wanted see that there was no unauthorised people loitering about up here and the guards informed me that you were up here with His Majesty’s permission.”

Billy sighed in relief; Sir James was the sort of man you did not want to make cross, for where Teddy looked powerful but gentle, the Prince’s adjutant looked dangerous and uncompromising. Like he could get rid of anyone he found troublesome with exceeding easiness.

The Knight looked at Billy for a moment longer and then turned his gaze down towards the Diet members below them.

“You are not a member of the Diet?” Billy asked and looked down as well.

“No.” Sir James replied. “My family is not influential enough to be sent to the Diet to represent our province’s nobility. I’m also not in any way interested to act as a delegate, can’t stomach all that endless debating and politics.” There was a hint of distain in his voice as he leaned against the metal railing while looking at the throng of people below.

Billy just hummed in reply.

“I’m here just because Steve is.”

“Is Prince Steven a member of the Diet?”

“No. He isn’t part of any Estate; he is royalty so he cannot represent anyone.”

“Of course.” Billy said, blushing at his own silliness.

The Knight had not apparently noticed the ridiculousness in his words, or he simply politely ignored it.

“Be careful not to slip and fall down when they blow the trumpets.” Sir James said, but when Billy turned to ask what he meant, the man was already out of earshot. He really moved like those large predatory cats that roamed the hot, humid forests that Billy had heard stories about; full of strength in their coiled muscles, but fast and absolutely silent. Deadly, in one word.

Billy looked at Sir James’ retreating back for a moment longer and then turned his attention back towards the gathering below. Just as he started to wonder when the ceremony was going to properly begin, the blaring sound of trumpets nearly gave Billy a heart attack. He turned his head towards the main entrance and saw how the massive halves of the Hall’s door were pushed open, the trumpets still making an almighty sound that bounced from the stone walls and the vaulted ceilings, then finally fading.

A procession entered and slowly made its way towards the throne, Teddy, however, was not the first one to enter. At the helm of the slow moving column of people was George carrying a large staff, dressed in robes similar to those of the King, though slightly less ornate. Behind him came a group of twelve heralds in their green tabards, each one holding a thin white rod in front of them.

A group of four men walked behind them, each clad in robes identical to one George wore, though none of the men carried a staff with them. If Billy would have had to to hazard a guess, he would have said that the men were the members of the Privy Council, although he had no idea who was who.

Behind the Privy Councillors walked abreast two men holding grand and bejewelled swords with their tips towards the ceiling, both holding the weapons with two hands because of the size and weight of the blades. But Billy’s attention quickly moved forward, for behind the men carrying the large ceremonial swords walked the King.

 

Teddy looked regal.

 

If Billy had thought that his lover had looked majestic previously, then he had been very mistaken.

Teddy looked every inch of the King he was, large imposing, almost larger than life as he slowly walked forwards, towards the throne. The onlookers each bowed or curtsied when their sovereign walked past them, and these weren’t little nods or bobs but deep, deferential shows of veneration. Even though Billy was half a hall away he could see that the King’s eyes did not stray to the sides. It was almost as if he did not notice the people around him, or didn’t perhaps consider them to be worthy of acknowledging. But Billy knew how warm and friendly the King was towards people below him, so he hazard a guess that Teddy was playing a part to some extent.

When the King reached the stands, the members of the Diet as well bowed or curtsied to show their respect, though from his vantage point Billy could see how some of the nobles kept their bows shallow and how some even had expressions of barely concealed irritation on their faces.

George was the first one to reach the dais and he climbed the steps up and walked to stand beside the throne so that he would be standing on the King’s right hand side. The heralds were the next ones to reach the steps, though not ascending. Instead they parted to both sides of the elevated platform, six of them forming a human barrier on each sides of the dais, leaving a wide gap however between them for the people following them to pass through. The Privy Councillors followed the Lord Chancellor’s example and took their places on the King’s right as well, ending up standing in front of five decorated chairs, one for each Lord.

The sword carriers took their places in front of the heralds, one man on each side of the ceremonial route and then it was the King’s turn to walk up the steps.

It was only then that Billy realised that a long velvet train followed the King. What had to be a fifteen feet long piece of heavy, green cloth with an ermine lining and piping was carried by four pageboys and they dutifully followed their sovereign up the stone steps and to the throne, in front of which the King stopped, turning to face the people. The boys arranged the train next to the King and then with deep bows retreated somewhere out of sight.

Again Billy realised how solely focused on his lover he had been, not having noticed that the King’s cousin had been walking right behind him, only few feet behind Teddy’s train. Prince Steven took his place on the King’s left side where a seat that in style was somewhere between the throne and the chairs for the Privy Councillors waited him. The small prince was clad in robes identical to the King’s, though he was without a train and the crown on his head was less ornate than his cousin’s. But considering that he was seated in the spot where the King’s consort would sit, it told quite clearly, that when it came to importance and standing in court, Prince Steven was right at the top even though he did not hold any official position. He however was first in the line of succession and would ascend to the throne if something was to happen to the King.

Finally, when the people in the procession to the dais, those who had walked behind Prince Steven, had taken their positions at the foot of the stands, the King spoke.

“My Lords, venerable members of the Clergy, esteemed Burghers and Peasants, pray be seated.”

The people up in the stands sat down on the long, padded benches, and so did the Privy Councillors and Prince Steven, but the King remained standing, his hand remaining confidently on the hilt of his sword. He allowed his gaze to sweep over the attendees and even though he did nothing more than that, the aura of absolute authority that surrounded him was unchallengeable. But then his eyes glanced up, right where Billy was perched, and the King looked straight into his eyes, and a shiver ran through Billy, because for a brief, flickering moment the surety in Teddy’s eyes gave way for soft, gentle love.

Billy so yearned for a chance to reply to that gentle expression, but the only thing he could do was to quickly and silently mouth the words ‘I love you’. The King saw his declaration of love and the corner of his mouth quirked up to an almost imperceptible little grin. Then, like a key had turned in a lock, the smile was gone and he was looking at the Diet members with a serious expression.

“We have summoned you here to this extraordinary Diet and we understand that for many of you it is an inconvenience, but certain pressing issues have forced our hand to call this gathering this late into the year. You all know the reason why the Diet has been unable to convene in the past year and a half and therefore hopefully understand the need for swiftness in this regard.”

There was some quiet muttering amongst the Diet members but none said anything and the King continued.

“The letter accompanying our Royal Proclamation stated the reason behind this Diet being an amendment to the Law of the Realm. The letter did not specify what the proposed amendment was and we are aware that there have been rumours circulating around this matter. We can now tell you what the proposed revision to the law is. Simply put, it is our will that this Diet passes a law that reduces the rights and liberties of the Marcher Lords, and brings them on par with the other nobles of Löwe.”

This caused significantly more pronounced expressions amongst the listeners; some were of surprise and others almost of glee. And some of the lords beneath Billy, who had not even been following the King’s words, their heads snapped to the King’s direction with expressions of utter rage on their faces.

“We feel that the actions taken by Lord Nor-” The King was quiet for a moment. “Former Lord Norris that is. We feel that his actions have made it poignantly clear that this system where some of the peers have rights that their counterparts from other parts of our Kingdom do not share cannot go on. This is a question of equity between you, my Lords, and a question of security and safety of my realm and my people. Norris’ rebellion was a first act of insurrection in this land in almost a hundred years and his deeds have left some deep scars in all of us. I’m sure that all the people in this hall share our sentiment of utter contempt towards the man who committed heinous acts during his insurrection and ordered the siege and sack of Birdenbergh.”

This time there were some agreeing nodding and humming by the Diet members.

“When we ascended the throne less than a decade ago we hoped that our reign would continue with similar august serenity that the reigns of my late mother and grandfather had. But alas our heartfelt hopes were in vain and the calamity of war, internal one no less, befell our reign. We now consider it our duty to make sure that another such war shan’t ever repeat in this land, and to make sure that it so, we feel that this change in our Kingdom’s laws is a guarantee against such a war.”

Everyone was now intently listening.

“Changes to the rights of an Estate are always a matter of great dispute and we do know that this issue will be a controversial one, but the times have changed. We all know that the law granting special privileges for the Marcher Lords is an antiquated one. It is a remnant of our history that has lingered in the law books far beyond actual necessity. Löwe is a powerful kingdom nowadays and its borders are secure against all outside threats as the power of the Crown has taken full responsibility of the Kingdom’s safety away from the Marcher Lords. Administrative regions, the marches that is, that are not fully under the Crown’s control cannot be allowed to exist any longer, especially when such regions have for a while now been hotbeds for insurrectionist and secessionist movements.”

The King’s tone grew hard.        

“Norris’ rebellion was, as we stated, the first such act in a long time. But… even before it we were not so blind as not to know that there has always been intrigue by some who have felt that they could gain something from an internal strife in this land. Norris however was the only one who dared to act _openly_ and tried to gain something with direct action, that being our crown.”

The people in the Hall were now quiet as a mouse, clinging to the King’s words with rapt focus.

“We were perhaps naïve before the rebellion, naïve in our belief that none could be so immoral as to subject this land to the horrors of war where brother would fight against brother and son against father…  We ourselves experienced the horrors of war and do not wish it to repeat, and therefore we can assure you that any such actions that would try to lead us all to another such war, no matter how inconsequential such actions might be, they would be stopped. And those who would be in anyway connected to these actions would be dealt with accordingly…”

The King’s words were laced with thinly lazed threat and his gaze again swept over the people gathered in the Hall.

“We will defend this Kingdom’s safety and peace fiercely, and even if for some reason we would be incapable to do so, there would be others to make sure that peace is maintained.”

The King glanced at his cousin and nodded to him, and Prince Steven nodded back sternly. Then the King’s expression softened.

“We will finish our speech now as we are sure that we are all exited to get to the thrilling matter of legislative work.” The King jested and cracked a smile to ease the tension, and a small collective chuckle went through the Diet. “But, before finishing, we would like to extent the Crown’s and our personal gratitude to the lower Estates for their solidarity towards those displaced by Norris’ actions. The extra tax they graciously agreed to pay helped, with the Crown’s funds, to start the rebuilding of Birdenbergh. I’m sure that the Lord Mayor of Birdenbergh will join us in our gratitude.”

Billy could see how an old, rotund man in his sixties from the ranks of the burghers got up and bowed to the King, and then to his fellow delegates. The King replied with a small polite nod and continued. “Members of the Diet, may divine providence guide you in your deliberations and make you faithful custodians of the trust bestowed upon you.” He finished.

George stood up and walked near the edge of the dais and banged his staff against the stone floor, the sound echoing for a moment.

“The Estates shall now take the oath and swear fealty to the Crown.” The Lord Chancellor called out and three men and a magnificently dressed Lady stepped forward walking up to the dais, each one representing their respective Estate. George then spoke again:

“Do you promise and affirm before the almighty and all-knowing God, that you are a trustworthy and faithful subject of the King and that you want to serve him honestly and, to your best ability, seek and pursue your Kingdom’s edification and advantage. Will you everywhere and in every situation, during the peace and during the war, defend the honour and rights of your King and of your fatherland and the Laws of the Realm, and with honesty serve as a member of the Diet?”

The Lady with a beautiful, chestnut coloured hair, adorned with magnificent headdress stepped forward.

“Lady Carter, for yourself and for your Estate,” The Lord Chancellor called out. “Do you swear fealty to your King?”

“I do.” She said, her right hand raised, with the index finger and middle finger extended upwards and the last two digits curled downwards against the palm; the thumb pressed against them.

Then one by one each of the other representatives of their Estate stepped forward, saying the words ‘I do’ with raised hands, and then, after the man for the Peasantry had sworn his Estate’s fealty, they all bowed, or in Lady Carter’s case curtsied, and returned to their seats.

George again banged his staff against the stone floor and loudly proclaimed, “The Diet is in session. God save the King!”

“God save the King!” The people echoed back and George stepped forward, the heralds following and the royal procession left the Great Hall in same order as they had come in, people again bowing when their King passed them.

Then it was over, the great doors closed, and the stillness that had held for the last second ended as people abruptly started to chat. A sea of voices filling the space once more as people started to make their leave or stayed put to converse with people near them. Billy himself also decided to make his leave and withdrew back near the wall, away from the edge of the triforium.

He walked back to the small door and made his way down the dusty stairs, but the second he had pushed open the door at the foot of them, a pair of large arms pulled him against a broad, warm, and familiar smelling chest.

“Hello.” Teddy hummed contently into Billy’s hair.

The King was still wearing his ceremonial robes, but the long train was gone and Billy could freely slip his arms around his lover. He loved the gentle yet obviously powerful way Teddy always held himself and Billy also loved the smell of the soap he used, and clean sweat that emanated from Teddy. It was usually there only after combat practice but the robes were apparently so hot that it was there now as well. But what Billy loved the most was the way he could hear Teddy’s heart, slow and steady and powerful, under his ear. He loved Teddy.

“Hi.” Billy whispered back burrowed against Teddy’s body. “It didn’t take an hour.” He murmured after a while.

“Mhmm.” The blond hummed deep in his throat. “I decided to shorten my speech a tad as this is not a regularly scheduled Diet. Though, really I only just wanted to get back to you.”

“That’s just fine by me.” Billy smiled and reached up to place a kiss onto the corner of Teddy’s mouth.

It was then that George walked through a side door that led to the Great Hall; he smiled when seeing the King and his lover, but did not comment on their intertwined bodies.

“Excellent speech, sire. Precise and on point, so I’m sure the message got through. Some of your lords could do with some fear of God put into them.”

“I’d rather have them feeling some fear towards me,” The King said, and the way in which it was said sent some thrilling shivers racing up Billy’s spine. “But I’ll take what I can get.” He hummed and placed another kiss on top of Billy’s head.

“You looked handsome while speaking.” Billy said and pulled back a bit to look up at the King. “Very commanding and imposing if I might say so.”

“It’s the robes.” Teddy said with a small shrug.

“Partly perhaps,” Billy smiled. “But you fill them very well,” He slid his palms up to Teddy’s broad shoulders. “Up here especially.”

“Thank you.” The blond grinned, rolling his shoulders, and even through the several layers of expensive and thick cloth and fur Billy could feel the large muscles undulating. “Speaking of the robes, I need to get out of them this instant, they are bloody uncomfortable and I’m hot under the collar, and most definitely not in the good way.”

Billy huffed fondly and grabbed Teddy’s hand, lacing his fingers with the thick ones of the King and led him towards his apartments. As they the Lord Chancellor George just shook his head and huffed fondly, watching his King’s departure with a pleased smile.

 

 

As they walked up to the King’s bedchamber’s door, one of the servants in attendance bowed and asked if the sovereign would need their assistance with disrobing.

“I can manage myself. Just come and collect them at some point.”

“Of course, sire.” The retainer replied and the King and his lover entered the room by themselves, shutting the outside world on the other side of the thick oak door.

“Finally, some peace and quietness.” Teddy sighed and flung his crown onto the sofa where it landed with a soft thump. He also removed the belt from his hips and threw it with the sheathed sword on the sofa next to the crown.

Billy shared the sentiment fully. It had been great to see Teddy’s speech, him in his full regalia, and the people in the Great Hall, but the hustle and bustle, and the rush of people still left Billy a bit uneasy, this even though he had not been right at the centre of it all.

“Would you help?” Teddy asked softly, and of course Billy would. He walked to the King and the first thing he did was to take off the heavy, golden chain that hung on Teddy’s shoulders. Billy returned the collar back to its box and then started to undo the numerous small points and hidden clasps that kept the robes looking perfectly fitting.

The first piece of the outfit that came off was the white ermine piece covering the King’s shoulder, like a short cloak that was just long enough to cover Teddy’s upper torso. The blond sighed in relied when the weight left his shoulders.

The next piece was a long and heavy, green mantle that dragged the floor, but it came off easily as it only had couple of clasps holding it together. Under it however was a slightly shorter, but much more fastidiously pointed and just as heavy and ornate piece of clothing; the long tunic, or mantle, was closed with several hidden little points and Billy started to untie them quickly.

“You really are bundled up.” Billy said and grinned as he finished untying the final little bow.

Teddy snorted. “Tell me about it. Why do you think I prefer simple clothing?” He grinned. “If I were to dress every day like some of the more traditional courtiers wish I would, I’d spend two hours every morning just getting dressed.” He then shrugged the long garment off and groaned in a relieved manner, standing there in his underclothing for a moment and just breathing in and stretching his large body this and that way.

“Better?” Billy asked with a loving smile.

“Yes.” The King sighed and Billy carried the robes to the bed, noting that the combined weight of them was quite substantial. No wonder Teddy wanted out of them as soon as he could.

As Billy was laying the garbs made of precious cloths, their silver and gold threads glinting in the sunlight, on the bed in a way that they would prevent them from getting too badly rumpled, Teddy strode behind him and once more wrapped Billy in a warm embrace. His soft lips pressed against the side of Billy’s neck, then against his jaw and finally on his temple.

“I love you.” Teddy murmured.

Billy just hummed contently and closed his eyes, relishing the warmth and closeness of the King’s body, the press of his strong body against his own. Then suddenly before Billy could react Teddy hoisted him up so that his feet weren’t touching the floor and fell into the bed with Billy in his arms.

“Teddy,” Billy admonished. “Your robes are going to get creased.”

“I don’t care.” The King hummed and rolled them so that Billy ended up on his back, caged between Teddy’s arms and legs, his much larger body hovering over Billy’s.

Billy could only stare up the blond and take in his loving expression.

“God you’re beautiful.” Teddy said lowly and a shiver ran up Billy’s back when the blond leaned down to press a smouldering kiss on his lips. “Never seen anyone so beautiful.”

“Teddy…” Billy whispered when the King kissed his way down to Billy’s throat, shivering when Teddy’s fingers opened the small clasps that kept his tunics high collar closed. “Ted-” Billy whimpered when the blond pressed a kiss on his jugular and ever so gently nibbled there.

“Fuck, Billy.” The King said huskily and then one of his large hands was slipping under the hem of Billy’s tunic. It felt so good, so good to have Teddy’s large, warm hands on his body, warm calloused palm sliding up to hitch the hem of his undershirt out from his trousers. The large hand was finally splayed against his bare skin and it felt so good…

 

And then it didn’t.

 

A wave of nausea coursed through Billy.

“Teddy…” Billy whimpered and this time it wasn’t one of pleasure.

The blond immediately stopped his ministrations, moved so that he wasn’t looming over Billy, and looked worriedly down at his lover.

“Billy, darling, what is it?”

“I’m sorry.” Billy whispered, his eyes closed.

It wasn’t like Teddy’s hands and lips hadn’t done their fair share of exploration over his body in the past several weeks, but this was somehow different. It was the way Teddy had been over him, probably; it had suddenly reminded him how Norris had sometimes started his brutality with false gentleness. He had gotten some perverse satisfaction from pretending to be a gentle lover who was showering his beloved with affection. Whenever he had done that, it had left Billy feeling sick and frightened because he had always known that it was only a matter of time when the violence would begin.

“I’m sorry.” Billy whispered again. “It’s just… I’m not… I don’t think that I’m ready t- to do _that_.” Billy turned away from Teddy and curled in on himself.

“Sex?” Teddy asked carefully.

Billy just nodded shakily, even though nothing in Teddy’s actions had indicated that he had been even planning to do something.

“May I touch you?” Teddy asked, his voice laced with soft worry.

Billy again nodded jerkily, and the King carefully lied down behind him, pulling Billy against his front. Neither man said anything for a while.

“I…” Billy mumbled. “I know that I should be over what was done to me, that you deserve _it_ , but I’m not ready just yet and…” Billy swallowed thickly. “And if you need to find someone else to b- be intimate with, I won’t mind. Men have needs and as I’m useless in that regard, so you can… can find someone who isn’t. I’ll understand it completely.”

“Billy…” Teddy sighed and Billy could feel his warm breath against the back of his neck. “I don’t deserve anything from you. I am not somehow entitled to your body, Billy. It is, as I said in the beginning, your choice and your choice alone what you do. If you are not ready then that’s fine, I can wait. I can wait a year, or ten, it does not matter how long. I will wait as long as you need me to, and if you are never comfortable with the idea of us making love then that’s fine too. I love _you_ , not your body. Not that I don’t think it to be beautiful, because I do. You are beautiful and I can wait, and this alone is enough, having you in my arms is enough. It’s more than enough.”

Billy felt numb.

Teddy didn’t know. He didn’t know what Norris and others had done to him. He wouldn’t be saying these things if he knew, and Billy could not keep things to himself any longer.

“I’m disgusting.” Billy just blurted quietly. “You have no idea, Teddy. No idea at all what he did to me.”

“Billy…” Teddy said hoarsely.

“Norris was my first. Ever.” Billy said and stared at the opposite wall. “No one had ever taken me like that, from behind. It hurt, Teddy, it hurt so much. I had only used my fingers a couple of times to see ho- how it would feel, and then he just… He just dragged me to his bed and just… well, you know. I struggled against him, pleaded him to stop. I shouldn’t have.” He whispered. “It just exited him.”

Teddy had gone still behind him.

“After the deed he said he was going to keep me, and I was put into that hole you found me in. I became his plaything.”

“How… How many times did he…” Teddy’s words petered out.

“I was with him for bit over three years.” Billy said lowly. “I stopped counting after the tenth time.” Billy choked out something between a gasp and sob.

Teddy didn’t say anything and Billy continued tremulously. “Sometimes he would make beg, beg for him to fuck me; like I needed it, wanted it. He’d have me on my knees and I’d have to crawl to him like some dog, ‘like a bitch in heat’ he used to say.”

Billy stopped and swallowed hard, turning so that his head was pressed against Teddy’s shirt with a deep, horrified shudder. “Sorry.” he whispered with a small sob, and Teddy shook his head.

“Take your time, darling, it’s okay.” He said, so softly, but his voice was wavering. Billy shivered with the effort of not crying, but then gasped tearfully and wept softly for a few moments while Teddy held him.

“Then he at some point got bored with just beating and fucking me, and h- he started to play with the knife.” He whispered finally. “First I thought he was just using it to intimidate me, make me more frightened, bu- but then he actually cut into me.” Billy stopped then, and absolutely crumbled in Teddy’s arms, breaking down in awful, brutal tears that seemed to ripple through him and pull his lungs inwards, swallowing him whole. Teddy remained quiet, didn’t do anything but held Billy like it was all he was put on this earth to do.

“I told him to stop, begged.” Billy choked out, in such a small voice that maybe Teddy hadn’t even heard it. “I can- I can still remember what his laugh sounded like, and how he smelled. How it hurt when, when the kni-” Billy dissolved into another burst of sobbing, still pressed up against Teddy, trying to make himself as small as possible as he withered in his arms.

Billy again swallowed hard, blinking back tears. “One time I accidentally knocked over a small table and broke three glass challises.” Billy exhaled, lifting his hand to stifle a sob, fighting tears ferociously. “They were really expensive.” Exhaling tearfully, Billy swiped a furious hand across his cheek. “And he hit me and he- he- he told me to kneel and-” Billy choked out a small sob and he could feel how Teddy drew a sharp, horrified breath. “And he picked up the biggest piece and he- um-” With a ragged gasp Billy closed his eyes. Teddy rubbed Billy’s shoulder with soft pressure for a few moments until he shook his head and took another shallow breath.

“He made me suck him off while he- he cut it against my shoulder.” Something broke in Billy while he said it, crumbling into tears again as Teddy gasped, sickened and anguished. “He said because that I was his and- and the challises had been expensive, I needed to pay him back somehow.”

Teddy pulled Billy in and let him cry against his shoulder, cradling him as softly as he could.

“Norris wasn’t the only one.” Billy muttered tremulously after a moment.

“What?” Teddy replied in horror, like all the air had been sucked out of his lungs. Billy pressed his palms to his eyes, breathing slow and ragged.

“There were quite a few other people, Norris’ guests and such.” Billy finally mumbled. “Some of them were worse than others. Some of the- Some of them were really, really bad.”

“How many people did that to you, Billy?” Teddy asked carefully.

“I don’t know,” Billy repeated desperately. “At- at- at some point, it stopped mattering because I stopped telling anyone ‘no’. Because people just fucking did it no matter what I said.”

A small, broken sob escaped from Teddy’s lungs. “I’m so sorry, Billy.” He whispered, sounding horrified. Billy swallowed and pushed himself closer into Teddy’s chest.

“Not- not- not everyone was like that,” Billy muttered after maybe a moment of silence. “Some of them just wanted a normal- a normal bed-warmer. In out in out, done.” He sucked in another gulp of air, shaky and terrified. “Just… some people-” His voice broke desperately again. “Some people were so fucking bad, Teddy, they- they-” And he was crying again, the dulled, suppressed aches of trauma raw and brutal again, leaving him shaking and panicky and unravelled in Teddy’s arms again.

“It’s okay, darling, I’m right here, you’re okay,” Teddy murmured soothingly. He kissed the top of Billy’s head, stroked his hair with aching softness for a few fragile minutes.

“There was this man, I don’t know his name.” Billy closed his eyes, his face anguished and contorted in distress. “He was Norris’ guest, other lord I think. At least he sounded like one. Anyway, he- He and Norris’ had just agreed something and they wanted to celebrate, and Norris told him that h- he could do with me as he pleased.”

A brief, ragged sob escaped between Billy’s lips. “He- he was one of those men who was into all sorts of depraved stuff, well… choking mainly.”

His face was hidden in Teddy’s chest, words half slurred and a tremor in his voice, as a kind of numb sickness settled over him.

“I- I pleaded him, begged that he wouldn’t do it, but- but he didn’t listen. You know, obviously. He tied me and just kept his hands around my throat as he fucked me and then started to squeeze. He would almost make pass out and then let me take a small gasp of air and then squeeze and it just went on. But then he didn’t let go and I… I thought that I was going to die, and an- And I remember that my last thought was that I wouldn’t have to bare it any longer. I was grateful that he was going to throttle me. But I just passed out and then woke up after he had finished.”

Billy managed to utter, but it was more of a whimper than anything else, and Teddy ran his hand up and down Billy’s back gently. “And he- he made me thank him after, he told me I liked it.” He broke down into sobbing once more, slumping against Teddy, who pulled him in little closer.

“Oh god, Billy” Teddy breathed, voice quivering. “Oh darling. Oh, Billy, I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry.” Billy just made himself smaller, hiding against Teddy’s chest.

He shuddered, clinging to Teddy, who held him a little closer and swallowed the sickness that clawed at his throat. “The worst thing that happened wa- was-” Billy paused and swallowed, trembling so hard that even Teddy’s firm embrace could not keep him from shuddering. “It was when Norris called in five of his guards.”

Billy’s breathing constricted with terror when saying that, his hand tightening against Teddy’s side in fear. He whimpered a quiet, broken thing that caused the King to tighten his embrace.

“Billy, you don’t have to do this,” Teddy murmured tearfully, pressing a soft kiss to his temple, but Billy just shook his head frantically.

“I want to get it out.” Billy mumbled, voice muffled by Teddy’s chest. He could feel Teddy swallowing and nodding, working his fingers softly through his hair.

“I’m right here.” Teddy replied. “I’m here.”

“One day Norris came to my chamber,” Billy started brokenly, barely managing to hold a back a gag. “He said that he was bored and wanted some entertainment. He dragged me out and five of his guards were there waiting.”

Teddy had gone absolutely motionless, even his chest was still.

“H- He pulled me in front of them, walked to his chair and grabbed a flagon of wine, and… and…” Billy was shivering like he was ill. “And told them to use me. He didn’t say anything else, just ‘Use him’.”

Billy could barely breath, he felt like air had been drawn from his lungs.

“They took turns. I don’t know how long it lasted, they just didn’t stop, and Nor- Norris, he just sat there and watched as they did what they wanted. It hurt, Teddy, it hurt so much. I had stopped pleading to Norris to not hurt me whenever it was just him a long time before that, but it hurt so much that I again did. I begged him to stop them and he just grinned and told them to give it me harder.”

Teddy’s grip on him was now almost bruising, but that was good because it was the only thing holding Billy together. He would have probably shattered to million pieces without Teddy’s arms around him.

“He made them stop only when there was a bit too much blood, said that he didn’t want me to become too loose. I passed out after that however. When I woke up, uh-” Billy stopped, exhaling tearfully.

“It just- it just hurt. I was bleeding and it just hurt.” Billy was still crying, but now he felt like something putrid had settled in him, waiting for Teddy to react, to shame him. Teddy was still for a moment longer then going back to rubbing soothing circles over his back, dull relief washed through Billy and he relaxed ever so slightly. He felt ruined, his face tear stained and cheeks flushed, a hollow, terrified sheen in his eyes.

“It took me over a week to be fully healed. But then h- he, they did it again.”

Teddy made a hurt sound, dull horror sinking in. Billy shivered, tensing once more.

“I actually tried to fight back the second time. I had not done that for a long time at that point, but I kicked and screamed.” Billy said hoarsely. “I shouldn’t have done that. He- he got really- really fucking angry.” He swallowed thickly. “They just kicked and beat me black and blue and then they the-”

Billy sobbed, breathless and hysterical, words slurring against one another. Then he slumped against Teddy and clung to him, fingers grasping desperately at his shirt as he held him so close. Wordlessly, Teddy held him with equal ferocity and softness, combing his fingers rhythmically through Billy’s hair. He was still shivering slightly and Billy vaguely though that he had never before felt so small in Teddy’s arms before, so horribly vulnerable and defeated.

In the morning Billy had though that Teddy, his closeness and his love, made him less tarnished, less disgusting. But now he felt filthy, used and so utterly tainted that no matter what, he would remain so. His lover had to be disgusted by now, any person should have been, and so he wiggled out of Teddy’s hold and stood up, leaning against one of the bedposts.

“I can leave,” Billy whispered finally, so quietly that Teddy barely heard it.

“What are you talking about?” Teddy replied, sounding lost. Billy kept looking down at his feet, swaying where he stood.

“I know I’m disgusting,” He replied hollowly. “You don’t have to bear it. I can go… I shou- I should go. I’ll go.” Billy whispered.

Then like a bolt of lightning Teddy was on his feet, standing in front of Billy. “Billy,” He said, his voice wavering frantically. “Billy, please look at me.”

Billy lifted his gaze, his eyes empty and miserable. Teddy swallowed, raising his hand to touch Billy’s cheek softly, brushing away some of the tears. He was so glad that Teddy could bear to touch him this one last time.

“I love you.” Teddy said fiercely, his voice cracking. “I love you more than anything. You’re not disgusting.” Teddy swallowed a sob and Billy stared at him, barely comprehending and afraid. “Billy you got hurt. How- how could you think that I’d shun you after that?”

Billy’s eyes shimmered with shame and exhaustion. “Because now you know,” He said in a small voice. “You know that I’m a disgusting and used. I let him, them to- to…”

“You didn’t let people do anything,” Teddy interrupted shakily. “It wasn’t- it wasn’t your fault Billy. None of it was your fault.” Billy gazed back at him for a moment, and then threw his arms around Teddy’s neck, shoulders shaking with broken sobs again.

“You’re the bravest person I’ve ever met.” Teddy mumbled hoarsely against his neck. Billy shook his head, not lifting it from Teddy’s shoulder. “Billy?” Billy looked up with a gulp of air, his expression ruined.

“You’re not going anywhere and I’m not going anywhere.” Teddy murmured firmly, running a hand over Billy’s back again. “Do you understand? I won’t- you’re not going to get hurt again. No one is ever going to hurt you ever again.”

Billy exhaled tearfully and slumped against Teddy’s chest, the blond taking his weight easily. “I love you, Teddy.” He said softly, the words loaded with so much emotion that he himself wasn’t able to comprehend it. There was so much Billy wanted to say but the sentiments were just lost fragments of emotion that he could not articulate, that would land unhelpful and inconsequential in the face of the wounds he was still reeling from, so he pressed a kiss to the side of Teddy’s neck and again cried. He still felt dirty and used, but perhaps Teddy had wiped away just the smallest amount of the filth in him.

 

\- -

 

When the hour was nearing midnight it was clear that Teddy was not going to get any sleep, even though it had been a long and exhausting day, and he gently detangled himself from Billy’s hold. He made a small sound as Teddy stood up, but didn’t wake up and the King leaned down to press a soft kiss on his brow and pulled the coverings right up to his chin. He was loathe to leave Billy even for a second, but he needed a moment.

Teddy added couple of logs into the still smouldering fire and left his and Billy’s bedchamber. The guards and the servant who was in attendance looked surprised for a moment to see their King up this late, as he rarely, if ever, left his chambers during the night.

“Come.” Teddy said to the servant and they walked to the armoury in silence, the castle around them quiet as a tomb. Once they reached the room full of armours and weapons Teddy pointed to one his countless harnesses, his favourite training armour, its polished steel glinting in the candlelight. He had already changed to his arming jacket and hose so that he could get the armour on him as soon as he could.

“Help me get it on.” Teddy grunted.

“Yes, sire.” The servant replied, but looking somewhat lost as he did not know what piece of the armour he should first help his king to put on.

“Greaves first.” Teddy said lowly and pointed to the pieces of metal that would protect his shins and calves.

It would have been easier to all if he had called one of his squires to help him into the armour as they knew precisely what to do, but they were fast asleep so the help from one of his regular servants had to be enough. The man worked fast enough, though struggling to tighten some of the straps properly.

“Then those.” The King pointed to large pieces of metal that would protect his upper legs. Both cuisses went on quickly, the little holes at their bottom locking with the pegs of the greaves’.

“Tighter.” Teddy ordered when the servant didn’t fasten the leather straps tight enough the first time. The man luckily was a quick learner and had nimble fingers, and when he tied the points that connected the cuisses to the arming jacket that happened quickly and the knots were tight enough.

The mail skirt went on him without a hitch and then it was the turn of the mail that protected his torso. The servant helped the habergeon on Teddy and then the breastplate was added on top of that. When the plackart went around his midriff the familiar weight of the harness was starting to feel and instead of finding it unpleasant Teddy relished it. It somehow grounded him, sharpened his senses and made him feel more… just more.

Then the King pointed to the vambraces and pauldrons and the servant helped them on, quickly tying the points that fastened them to the arming jacket. He held his arm on the servant’s shoulder as the man tightened the leather straps on the inside of his arm, then doing the same on the other side. Teddy walked over to the shelf where the parts of his armour were kept and grabbed the bevor, he didn’t really require protection for his neck and throat as the armour was on him only for weight, so he put it away, also leaving his helmet and sabatons behind.

When the servant fastened the final strap of his gauntlets Teddy walked to the door. “Fetch me a canteen of water and leave it by the training room’s door, then come back here and wait for my return.”

“Sire.” The servant replied with a bow and left the armoury, closing the door behind him.

Teddy walked to the training room where he picked up one of the heavy sledgehammers, testing its weight in his hands. He then stalked to the large piece of oak wood in the corner, took a tight grip of the hammer’s wooden shaft with both hands, and hit the piece of cut timber with all of his might, swinging the hammer in a great arch over his shoulder. The force of impact coursed up his arms, shaking his whole body. Teddy then switched the hammer to his left, again swinging with full force. Then back to the right hand and swung the heavy hammer. Then another switch and a swing, and so forth.

The wood cracked and creaked with the savage blows, the sharp cracks echoing from the stone walls. Soon a sheen of sweat covered Teddy’s brow and he could feel how his clothes got wetter and wetter as he swung the hammer again, and again, and again…

A burning sensation started to creep all along his arms and shoulders but he didn’t stop.

After a while the handle broke and splintered in his hands. Teddy just cursed savagely and grabbed another hammer and continued his exercise. After god knew how many blows he was panting and his arms were starting to hurt, but he forced himself to continue through the pain.

It wasn’t until he could barely lift the hammer that he stopped, throwing it against a wall where it cracked away a piece of the whitewash.

Teddy stood still and panted, his chest, his whole body heaving.

 

He was angry.

 

It was a kind of hatred that Teddy had never, ever experienced before. He had though that he knew anger, knew what it was to hate. He had been a fool to think that that feeling he had felt towards Rollins had been hate. But now this… after what Billy had told him, he was full of the kind of rage that made the world around him feel slow and explosive, a thick fog of loathing filling his every sense. Rage that clouded Teddy’s vision and did not let up.

The unfathomable hate he had for those men who used and hurt Billy the way they had, who were so impossibly cruel and sadistic, the hate for those men was pulsing through Teddy’s blood like never before, an untapped rage threatening to burst.

It was matched only by the blanketing, horrific sadness he felt, the desperate and vain desire to hold Billy with such fervour and love and protection that all of this hurt would have simply vanished. It was worse than anything Teddy had ever felt, seeing Billy so hurt, so small and lost, the sheer disgusting unfairness of it all. The way Billy, who was soft and kind, and pure, the way he had been tormented left Teddy heartbroken.

He had stood motionless by the window after Billy had finally fallen asleep. He had just stood there with a cup of wine in his hand staring out into the distance. Sorrow and anger swirling in him as a turbulent maelstrom; the slow, terrible reality swimming in his mind and making him unable to think clearly under the stupor of grief and rage. Finally he had snapped out of his apathy when a sticky wetness had covered his fist. Teddy had looked down and realised that he had crushed the silver goblet in his hand, the metal crumbled and its contents trickling down his fist and on to the floor. The grief had left him for a moment.

And now… Now there was nothing but rage swirling in the hole that grief had carved inside him.

Teddy marched out of the training room and grabbed the water beside the door, drinking half of it in one go. He stalked to one of the side doors of castle that he knew were always kept open with a guard outside.

The man leaning against his halberd nearly jumped out of his skin when his king stormed out with a murderous expression. Teddy paid him no heed and left his water near the door, did a couple of squats to get the blood running and then took off. The night was cold and the cool air dried some of the sweat from his brow as he ran, but after going around the keep a couple of times the pace he kept up and the added weight of his armour did their trick and Teddy started to sweat profusely, his breathing turning heavier and heavier.

The sound the armour made, his own breathing, and the roaring in his ears were the only sounds he could hear and after the umpteenth round around his palace his legs began to protest, but instead of stopping the King just pushed himself harder. The night guards on patrol saw him and more importantly heard him, the King’s armour clamouring in the otherwise silent bailey, but none said anything. They knew very well that their sovereign did something like this only when he was deeply troubled by something, and so no one bothered him.

No one dared say anything when he ran past them with tears in his eyes. And if someone would have claimed that that night King Theodore III, after miles of running in his armour around the palace, fell on his knees on the paving stones of the deserted bailey and threw up and wept, then the guards told that that person was a liar, trying to tarnish the King’s good name.

 

 

The captain of the Royal Guard, greying man in his fifties, pulled the King on his feet and steered him into the armoury where he and a waiting servant helped him out of his armour. A cup full of fortified wine that the Captain made the King to drink in one go seemed to bring him back to his full faculties and he quietly thanked both of them.

Teddy walked with the servant back to his apartments and after saying thank you and good night to the servant, who bowed and wished him good night as well, he entered his bedchamber.

Teddy walked to his bed where Billy was still sleeping, burrowed in the thick coverings and snoring slightly. He stayed by the bed just looking at his beloved for a moment until he silently padded to the bathing room where he drew himself a bath. He mechanically scrubbed himself clean, and after having dried enough, dressed in clean clothes and slipped between the bedcoverings.

Billy woke up when Teddy gently pulled him closer.

“Ted-” He yawned. “What is it?”

“Nothing, my love.” Teddy whispered and pressed a soft kiss on Billy’s forehead. “It’s nothing, go back to sleep.”

Billy just muttered something unintelligible, rolled over and buried himself against Teddy front. The King wrapped his arms around the smaller man and breathed in his smell.

The knowledge that Billy was safely in his arms, his scent, the ache in Teddy’s muscles, and the wine finally worked their magic, and Teddy fell to a welcome but fitful sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to be a fluffy filler, but obviously it is not. I am starting to consider that perhaps I should replace that Fluff and Angst tag with just Angst as I have steered away from my original idea of a fluffy story quite a lot. This story has become quite dark in some parts or perhaps just a bit too realistic when it comes to depicting the past, even if an imaginary one. But as this story is influenced by real history I have gravitated more towards the ‘warts and all’ style of writing, instead of a more fantastical style.
> 
> I was actually going to have some smut in this chapter, but then I checked this story’s timeline and realised that Billy has been with Teddy barely two months. While in a normal relationship this would probably be enough to get comfortable with one another, I realised that with Billy’s psychological wounds this was far too quick of a pace.
> 
> I’m not particularly pleased when I have to torment Billy this way, but in my head the treatment he had to endure was always pretty bad, and I wanted you, the readers, to be privy to it as well. Why, you might ask, and the answer is that when certain people will get what’s coming to them it will feel all the more pleasing…
> 
> If someone is interested, this is Löwe’s coat of arms (without the large swords behind the shield): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finnish_Army#/media/File:Suomen_Maavoimien_tunnus.svg
> 
> In reality it is the Finnish Army emblem, which in itself is a variant of Finland’s coat of arms, but as it has a lion on a green field I chose it.
> 
> I again apologise for the ridiculously long space between updates, but my studies and life in general have left me with precious little free time and as I now have two other stories as well underway… Again thank you for your kind patience.
> 
> I also thank you for the kudos and comments! I only couple of weeks ago realised that this story and UTNS were both over two thousand hits and one hundred kudos, which is, like… WOOOHOO!
> 
> Thank you!


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